


LOVE GAME

by Baekmintrash



Category: NU'EST, Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Arranged Marriage, BaekMin, Dongho and Daniel cousins, Dongho is bad at feelings, Drama & Romance, Fake Marriage, Falling In Love, Forgive Me, Friendship/Love, Idiots in Love, Inspired by local Tv series, JRen - Freeform, Jealousy, M/M, Minki and Minhyun brothers, One-Sided Attraction, Ongniel, Past Minron, Rating will probably change, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers, This isnt new story, aşk oyunu, be patient with me, it is really really slow burn but you will like it, lgbt marriages are quite normal, onghwang besties, read the tags, sorry for jihyo-daniel fans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2020-11-27 00:58:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 85,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20939663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baekmintrash/pseuds/Baekmintrash
Summary: Hwang Minhyun- the heir of the Hwangs EmpireKang Dongho-a worker living with his mother and brotherFate dragged Hwang Minhyun and Kang Dongho, two males who don't know each other into a fake marriage.It was just a game in the beginning but... Would it be just a game in the end?





	1. Love game

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear reader,  
firstly before starting to this ff, you should know that this is not a new story but a continuation of the one that I had orphaned before. If you have seen the same story twice, I am sorry. But I have decided to add the first 20 chapters which I have posted before, here to create a whole work. Therefore, if you have already read the first chapters, thanks for dealing with my dissatifying authoring and waiting for this ff patiently.  
I will update the story monthly. Love u all

“Yah Guanlin. Wake up. If the boss sees you are sleeping on the table you were supposed to clean, we will all be kicked out. Lin-ah!!" Dongho whispered trying to be silent as possible as not to make their boss hear them. Guanlin woke up with a start and said too loud not to be heard with his sleepy voice.  
“I-I am not really sleeping, I sw-swear to God I wasn’t sleeping.” tall boy said smoothing his strands and cleaning the both side of his mouth with his hands.  
“ Sshhhhsshhh!!!! Be quiet!! you idiot. It is me” Dongho trying to shush his friend looked around and thanked to God their boss didn’t hear anything. “Go home and sleep a little. We will deal with the rest” he whispered.  
With a relief, Guanlin let out a sigh and said “I am fine... Dongho hyung!” trying to open his sleep-swollen eyes.  
“Yaaah!!!!! go and rest a little bit. You …”  
He didn’t let Dongho finish the sentence.  
“Ok ok, I am going hyung, good night and ------Thank you” Guanlin chuckled and clasped his hands behind his back to take off the apron with a cute and sleepy face.  
“Don’t wander around. Just go home and rest” the tall boy nodded.

  
“He has been doing day and night shift for 3 days, he must be really tired” said Daniel, Dongho’s cousin on his father’s side. They were co-workers at a well-known café in Gangnam. Dongho nodded with acknowledgement.

“Hmm, he must be”  
“Aren’t you tired? You should rest, too Dongho.”  
“Don’t worry Niel. Evil never dies” he said laughing at himself while waving at Guanlin who was trying to walk out of the café without making their boss realize. Dongho turned his face to Daniel who was tall, brawny but cute with bunny-like front teeth.  
“Let’s endure it for 15 minutes more and then go home.” Dongho smiled to his cousin with a tired expression while walking towards the counter. At that exact moment, the café’s glass door was opened with a smooth click. Both Daniel and Dongho hoped this would be the last customer of this tiring and long day. Nevertheless, both bowed at the customer and said  
“Welcome….”

  
\----------

“Welcome Mr. Hwang” said the tall and incredibly attractive barman. “Would you prefer to drink the usual one or something else?”  
“The usual”Minhyun said scanning the every corner of the bar which he had seen for God-knows-how-many-times. Life was hard to endure. Being Hwang, being an heir, being CEO, being forced to get married to someone you don’t love….. Breathing, blinking, speaking, eating, drinking...Everything was hard.

Minhyun released a defeated sigh and covered his eyes with his right hand, rubbing his temple. He sighed again and tried not to recall any second of the argument with his father, not to think about his soon-to-be-spouse. He was very content with his life just an hour ago._ An hour ago..._  
\-------------------------------  
“Dad!!!” Minhyun yelled like he wanted to throw away his lungs. Standing in the middle of the big hall “I don’t love him. I don’t want to marry him and I won’t. I will do anything that you expect of me, anything but not this marriage.” W_hy was breathing so difficult right now? _  
Mr. Hwang turned his face to his son and said  
“You had to think that before your scandalous boyfriend slapped your face in front of the all Korean Magazines and before your stupid slapped face appeared on each newspaper on every land of Korea”  
“Dad it is not like you th…”  
“It is exactly like I think, son.” Mr. Hwang cut off.  
Minhyun fought to keep his expression steady locking his eyes with his father and said  
“I can’t even stand him leave alone love, dad”  
“You will love him as time passes” Mr. Hwang said dismissively turning his gaze the folder in his hands.  
“I am not ready for marriage” Minhyun gave a try again with his waning voice.  
“We have been waiting for you to be ready for this marriage for 3 damn years, Minhyun. But what have you done so far? You have just messed around with all men and women, deceived by your face and your loads in the banks. That is enough. We have tolerated your silly actions as your parents so far but we won’t anymore. You said you didn’t like women. I gave up on being grandparent. I accepted that and now I am offering you a husband. I am getting older, Minhyun and I just want to settle things up when I am still breathing. So, I am not going to eat any excuse that you put on the table, son. If you want to stay as Hwang and my son, you are going to marry Seo-Jun sooner rather than later and I will not have to see your pictures in the newspapers every day. Don’t even dare to mention postponing it, either”

“YOU CAN’T MAKE ME MARRY HIM” Minhyun snapped. Mr. Hwang sinking into the armchair looked up Minhyun. He stood up leaving the folder on the table and started to walk out of the hall. Then he suddenly stopped walking and turned his gaze back to Minhyun. He tilted his head and scowled at his son.  
“Try me!!! Minhyun. Do you have courage?”  
Minhyun wavered clenching his fists. He didn’t have courage, Even though he knew it, staying silent was a large burden on his heart.  
“Tomorrow we will announce your engagement with Seo-Jun during a party. Get ready” without giving any opportunity to Minhyun, Mr. Hwang went out…

Minhyun was left out of breath in the middle of the hall. Alone with his angry and soon-to-be-spilled tears…

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Someone patted Minhyun’s back and snapped him out of the memories conquering his mind.  
“Yaaah Hwang Minhyun.. What are you doing here like an old and alone man drinking out of his mind?”  
“I am just thinking about my wedding invitation card’s design to be able to make it fancy for all Korean high society.” said with a dismissive but anguished expression on his face.  
“What!!!” Seongwoo said not sure about what he heard.  
“What the shit are you talking about Minhyun? Are you drunk out of your mind?” he kept incredulously.  
“To be clear, Seongwoo, I am getting married, my friend. And now I am inviting you personally to my engagement and the wedding ceremony, which has been already arranged in a week after the engagement.” Minhyun said and sniffed scornfully. Seongwoo arched his brows at his best friend still not sure about what Minhyun was talking about.  
“Alright, I am changing my question then. Are you sober, Hwang Minhyun?  
“Yaaah!!Seongwoo!! I am telling you about my marriage ceremony and you are still questioning my alcohol tolerance” Minhyun arched his brows in a fake disbelief and kept  
“This is serious, Seongwoo. They want me to marry Seo-Jun as soon as possible. The pictures on the newspapers were the last drop of my father’s patience. They have leverage, Seongwoo and their patience ran out. He even threatened me with disinheritance." circling his index finger around the rim of the glass filled with liquor.  
“Minhyun-ah they have been trying to marry you to Seo-Jun for 3 years. What can they do at worst? They are bluffing. If you don’t want to marry Seo-Jun, then don’t.”

  
Without giving any thought, Minhyun pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed the number which he shouldn’t have. The moment phone was picked up, he said---truly shouted  
“Dad, I am not going to come to the engagement party or whatever it is and I am not going to marry Seo-Jun whatever you do. I really don’t care about being Hwang. If necessary, I am ready to overcome all difficulties made up with your own hand.”  
He couldn’t feel the oxygen in the air he felt like he was drowning under a large amount of water. But he succeeded it and said finally  
“I will choose whom to marry. Myself. Not you or anyone else in this universe.” and he hung up the phone pulling the collar of his shirt with a sigh out of relief like someone who managed to get his head out of the water. Minhyun looked up his friend, Seongwoo and smiled. Seongwoo smiled back with his handsome and elegant face. Ong Seongwoo was his childhood friend, his mood-maker, and his partner in crime. What would Minhyun do without him? Probably nothing..

Hours were ticking away. Time for Minhyun to face with his father was approaching step by step. Whatever happens, he made up his mind. He wasn’t going to marry anyone without his own approval.  
Seongwoo blinked at him gesturing Minhyun to make him glance at a tall and slim blonde girl who was already ogling Seongwoo with her hungry stares. Minhyun smiled at his friend and nodded. He watched Seongwoo walking away with the blonde girl god-knows-where.  
After drinking one more shot, Minhyun pulled out his credit card from his wallet to pay the bill and passed it to the barman. After a few moments, the barman returned with a worried face and said  
“Accept my apologies, Mr. Hwang. But the payment couldn’t be made. I think your card is out of use”.  
Turning his gaze at barman from the liquor Minhyun pulled another card and handed it over to barman.  
“Try this one” he said. After a couple of minutes, barman returned.  
“The payment couldn’t be still made, Mr. Hwang. And … And I have just received a call from the valet to inform you about your car was taken away by The Hwangs Holding.”  
“Wh- what? Minhyun froze in amazement. Then it hit Minhyun mercilessly. His pulse started to beat as fast as possible and he started to feel an overwhelming anger in his whole body making every hair stand on end. Gritting his teeth, he tumbled onto the chair and said  
“Dad!” he run his fingers through his hair and pulled it. He opened his wallet and paid the heavy bill in cash.  
“You are an idiot, Hwang Minhyun. Couldn’t you wait just a little bit to snap at your father? Oh my fucking God.” He said speaking to himself. He opened his wallet again and saw nothing but a bunch of cards which were probably out of use now.  
After a few minutes, he stood up and trudged towards the group of the people who were dancing mindlessly. The smell of sweat and perfume hit Minhyun’s nose as he approached the exit passing among the people savoring each other while dancing. He held his breath and walked out of the club. He breathed out closing his eyes and trying to calm his heart down. He squinted up the sky expecting to see the stars but he couldn’t see any because of the Gangnam’s colorful lights.  
“If you really exist, you have to help me.” Minhyun said still looking at the sky and breathing in and out. He started to walk but didn’t know where to go. He just wanted to walk, just wanted to see the stars, just….

\----------------

“Finally, it is over.” Dongho said while he was trying to lock the door made of glass. He sighed with exhaustion. Daniel smiled at him with his cute expression and said

“Thankfully” After being sure he locked the door properly, Dongho breathed out and rubbed his nape with his hand while moving his shoulders upwards downwards to loosen the aching muscles.

“I feel like I am going to die.”

“Don’t die before going home. I can't carry you.” Daniel said throwing his arm around Dongho’s shoulder.

They started to walk. This was the most pleasing moment of those days. At the end of a tiring day; walking, talking, and smiling recklessly with Daniel, his cousin and also his friend.

“Did you see the blonde girl? ” Daniel asked with a mischievous grin on his face.

“Who is the blonde girl?” Dongho responded the question with a question innocently not able to understand Daniel’s teasing.

“The one who drank liters of coffee to make you notice her. Now I see drinking liters of coffee doesn’t work on you” Daniel said and burst into laughter. Dongho punched his cousin’s shoulder to make him stop laughing.

“What?....... Dongho, I was really worried about her. I swear to God, she will not be able to drink and eat anything for at least 2 days. You should have seen her face when you passed by her table without noticing her poor attempts at flirting and paying any slight attention” Dongho pressed his hand onto his mouth as an attempt not to show Daniel his own grinning.

“Says the man who all girls in Gangnam……."

His sentence was left half as his phone started to vibrate in his pocket. He pulled out his phone and looked at the ID with a puzzled face.

“Mr. Park is calling,” Dongho said looking at Daniel. Mr Park was the owner of the café, and their boss. He was a man in his fifties, gray-haired, tall, carrying the handsomeness of the median age era on his face. He had both compassionate and affectionate personality. But when it comes to the business, he had hard principles.

Dongho picked up the phone wondering whether there was something wrong.

“Hello”

“Hello, Dongho, where are you?”

“We have just left the café, Mr. Park, is there something wrong?”

“No, Dongho, I forgot my wallet on the counter in the café. Would you mind taking and bringing it to me?

“Of course, Mr. Park”

“I will wait for you in front of COEX, Dongho. Thank you”

“You are welcome. Mr. Park. Good night”

Dongho pouting turned his face to the Daniel “You heard. You go; I will be at home in 15 minutes. OK?"

“OK, see you at home.” Daniel said smiling but disappointed since he wanted to keep teasing his friend.

Dongho turned back to get the said wallet. He unlocked the glass door and entered the café. He saw the wallet, took it and went out after locking the door just as 10 minutes ago. He sighed wondering when he would lay in his bed hugging his little brother, Jinho. When he reached COEX, Mr. Park was waiting for him there. He returned the wallet to Mr. Park and started to walk back to home. Home.. his lovely and small home.. With his mother and his little brother. After they lost his father in a terrible car accident 2 years ago, they had to re-start their life. It was hard. Really hard for all of them. For his mother, for his brother and for him. Dongho stopped going university and started to work although his mother objected to his decision strictly. She had cried begging to Dongho not to quit the school for days. He didn’t regret it a moment even if he had to give up on his big desire, music. Back then he had thought he couldn’t live without it. But fate taught him the other way sadistically. He despised hearing his little brother whimpering in his nightmares, seeing him looking at the men who were holding their sons’ or daughters’ hands, hearing his mother’s mourning at some nights, hearing her silent tears, seeing the pain replaced in her eyes on that black day more than the idea of giving up on his dreams. So, he quitted. Time tended to heal every wound but… death was something that the time couldn’t heal. Although he knew it wasn’t healing, it was just being accustomed to the pain; he was glad to see his mother started to smile more, plant flowers at the small garden in front of their house again, and have small talks with neighbors, murmur a song while cooking. He was glad to see his brother had fewer nightmares and started to hold Dongho’s hand more tightly when he saw a man with children. They got accustomed. They learned to live happily with their pain. Dongho shook his head trying to throw not-so-fascinating thoughts away and grinned imagining his little brother sleeping in front of the window waiting for him. He quickened his steps with the thought of hugging his brother while lying on his comfortable bed. He kept walking until skyscrapers replaced with small huts, colorful Gangnam lights with pale and waning street lambs, highways with alleys and blind streets. When he was about to turn last bend, a whimper full of pain startled him out of his thoughts. After a moment, he heard a man shouting

“You ….son of bitch” and then kicks thrown at something or someone. Whimper and breath. _Someone_ Dongho thought. They were kicking someone. Before quickening his steps with his all might towards the whimper, Dongho heard another man saying

“As expected, fat cats like him don’t carry cash. Take the watch!!!!” 

“LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!!!!” Dongho shouted out of his lungs and attracted all stares on him except one when he finally reached the resource of the voices. In an alley surrounded by three muddy and ugly- yellow painted walls.

_What a day_ he thought.

\------------------------------------------------

Minhyun fell to the concrete floor with the force of the punch on his jaw. He groaned with pain feeling like throwing away after tasting his own blood and swallowing a mouthful of it. He could feel the bruises and blood flowing from his elbows and knees under his black suit. _What a day_ he thought. Marriage, Hwang, father, inheritance… Everything was flowing in his mind. And now this……….Thankfully, he wasn’t a man who would give up immediately. He grinned looking at his own blood on the floor and suddenly jumped on his feet and threw his strong punch to the man with red hair whom Minhyun thought as the gang’s leader. He felt the crack of the bone under his clenched fingers. It was clear that Minhyun broke the man’s nose and he became extremely satisfied with his punch. Twisting in pain, leader fell to the ground.

“You…..son of bitch” one of them shouted when they realized their leader’s nose had been broken.. Minhyun suddenly felt two pair of hands grabbing him tightly by his shoulders and arms. After a moment his arms were stretched out while Minhyun was still looking at the male on ground. He fought to release himself from two males’ iron-hold. He was sure his arms would be bruised heavily. While he was trying to escape their tight grab, the man with cracked nose stood up and stared directly at Minhyun’s eyes with grudge. He sniffed and some blood came out like snot. Then he started to trudge towards Minhyun who was being hold at the place. When he approached enough not leaving his gaze from Minhyun, he suddenly kicked his ribcage with full force which consumed all oxygen in Minhyun’s lungs. The red haired male spat on the ground while Minhyun collapsed on the concrete floor out of breath and folding his hands over his chest.. _Breathe_ Minhyun thought. _You have to breathe_. Everything went black for just a moment.. He shook his head and tried to breathe in despite the excruciating pain in his chest. He tried to remind himself how to breathe properly He didn’t know how much time he laid there to regulate his breaths. Maybe seconds, maybe hours…

Then he felt hands on him and red haired one leaned down and whispered into Minhyun’s ear. “I would prefer do more interesting things to you. What a pity” Minhyun could feel his hot breath against his ear. He wanted to throw away. The leader straightened up and said scornfully

“As expected, fat cats like him don’t carry cash. Take the watch”. Then he felt someone touching his wrist.

At that exact moment, he heard a voice, rough and angry. 

“LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!”

Minhyun couldn’t find the strength to raise his head in order to see who owned that voice but he was grateful to whomever.

Dongho caught three man’s eyes. The one who had curly hair bended over the man lying on the floor and was trying to take off the watch; the one with red hair had a cracked nose and was standing with the third one who crossed his arms over his chest. Without a second thought, he ran towards to the man with curly long hair. Dongho caught him from the back of his ugly green T-shirt and threw him onto the red haired one. Both of them fell to the ground with groan. Without letting him react, he punched the third one with his all strength and watched the man’s falling to the ground in agony. Dongho stood protectively in front of the man who was lying on the floor. And then he said menacingly.

“If you all don’t leave here in 10 seconds, I swear to God, there won’t be any unbroken bone to move in your shit bodies when you wake up tomorrow.”

All of them looked into Dongho’s eyes and they stood up slowly. The red haired male threw a glance at Dongho rancorously again. But Dongho didn’t avert his eyes. Threatening and decisive. He was watching every movement carefully in case any threat, any small move, any flame to attack.

And they left..…Finally… …..Dongho sighed with relief seeing all three men leaving as he was too tired to clench his fist let alone _break any bones_. He turned back to the male lying on the floor and bended over him. It was the first time Dongho truly looked at his face and the first thing he thought was _“handsome”_ …_Even with a beaten face_. Dongho felt an urgent instinct to brush his hair strands away from his face to see more clearly. He had dark brown fox- like eyes, pale skin and full lips placed under his perfect round cheeks. His light brown hair was covering his brows which made him look more boyish. He had a tall structure, probably taller than Dongho, and broad shoulders. And also really good looking even in his muddy black suit. Dongho could swear both men and women had been slavering for this attractive and tall man.

_Anyway,_ Dongho thought.

“Are you alright?” he asked and wrapped his right hand around the man's waist to make him sit.

Minhyun felt the man’s hard arm muscles clasped tightly around his waist even over the fabric. He tried to sit, moaning with pain and said “I am OK. Thank you.”with his strained voice. He raised his head to look at the man who saved him and _who had hard muscles_. Literally Minhyun wasn’t expecting that. He was expecting to see a man older and……. and maybe less handsome one. He was expecting anyone but not this man. The man in front of him had incredibly handsome features and glowing with his white T-shirt and ripped blue jeans even in the shades of night. He had light brown eyes and black hair falling over his thick brows. Small face with full lips. He was just a little bit shorter than Minhyun but had a broader structure. Clearing his throat to put aside the thoughts about the man who saved him, Minhyun kept

“I m really sorry, you got into scrape because of me”

“No it isn’t but are you sure you are alright? Don’t you need to go to the hospital?” he said worried checking Minhyun with his eyes.

“Not really, it is just a light punch and kick. It is nothing really crucial. I can deal with it” Minhyun said smiling. “Anyway, here is not really suitable place to introduce myself but I am Hwang Minhyun. The CEO of the Hwangs Holding.” While Minhyun was expecting to learn this handsome man’s name, the said man arched his brows cutely and suddenly started to laugh in a _loud_ voice. Minhyun stared at him with a confused face trying to understand what was so funny. He struggled with his instinct to elbow the man to make him shut.

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Hwang. I am Donald Trump the president of USA.” he countered back trying to stop his laughter.

_Of course he wouldn’t believe it _Minhyun thought. But holding onto his pride “ I don’t have an intention to show you my ID card, _Mr. Trump. _Anyway, could you please lend me your phone for just a moment?” Minhyun said irritated. Amused by Minhyun’s irritation, Dongho grinning teasingly pulled out his phone and handed it to Minhyun and he said derisively. “What happened to your latest and highest technology phone? Mr. Hwang”

Minhyun frowned and pointed Dongho somewhere on the concrete floor and Dongho turned his glance to where Minhyun pointed and saw some electronic pieces scattered on all ground. While Dongho was looking at the floor with frowned brows, Minhyun dialed the number of the only person he could think; Seongwoo . As soon as the phone was picked up, Minhyun said hurriedly. 

“Seongwoo, I don’t care wherever you are or whatever you are doing. You have to come and pick me up. I am in…” he looked around trying to make sense of the place.

“Gangnam, near Cheongdam railway station” Dongho said. 

“You heard it. Seongwoo, hurry up.” and Minhyun hung up the phone and thanked to Dongho while returning the phone to him. “You are welcome.”

They waited for 15 minutes more. When Seongwoo came with his fancy red car to pick Minhyun up, Minhyun turned his back and said looking into Dongho’s eyes “Thank you”. Dongho bowed and watched them going. 

“Who is that hot guy?” Seongwoo asked when he pressed the gas. “Donald Trump” Minhyun said with an unintentional angry voice recalling Dongho’s laughter and his teasing face. “What!!!!!” Seongwoo said laughing. Minhyun said 

“I should have made friends with who would worry about his friend’s well being, not with the ones who ask the silly questions about the hot boys.” with an irritated tone.

Seongwoo kept laughing said “Accept it he is hot. ” Minhyun rolled his eyes.“Now it is time to tell me about your wellbeing” Seongwoo kept.

Dongho sighed after watching Minhyun getting in the car. Finally he would go home and sleep dead. Just when he started to walk, Dongho felt something clicking under his left foot. He looked below to see what it was and saw something silver. He leaned down to take it.


	2. Are you crazy?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am really sorry for deleted comments :(

Dongho’s eyelids were resisting not to be opened despite the weight he was feeling on his chest. The only thing he remembered he went up the stairs and tumbled into the bed without taking off his clothes as soon as he entered the home last night. _What time is it?_ he thought and felt a desire to throw a glance at the clock but he didn’t have the strength to open his eyes let alone turn his head right to look at the clock placed on the nightstand. When he managed to open his left eye, he raised his head very slightly to see the reason of the weight on his chest and he saw a pair of little arms clinging to his body. His head hit the pillow with a sound _puff_ and he closed his eyes again. “Hhhhyyyuuuuuunnng, wake up”. Dongho protested with a groan trying not to open his eyes, sunlight leaking into the room from the little gap between brown curtains and little arms shaking him violently weren’t helping, though.

“Yaahh Jinho-yah. Hyung is very tired. Let me sleep a little more. Hımmmm?” He said without opening his eyes.

“Noooo” Jinho protested shaking Dongho more violently with his short and thin arms. “Hyung, you promised me. We are going to the amusement park today, aren’t we? You forgot it, right?” Jinho said with a voice ready to turn into sobs.

“Aaahhh” Dongho remembered the promise he made with his brother. Today he was free and he had promised he would take his little brother to the amusement park. “OK OK. I woke up” Dongho said opening his eyes and he was amused with his brother’s pouting cute face.

“Mom?” Dongho asked still lying on the bed with Jinho on his chest. “Mom is preparing breakfast for us.” Jinho said still clinging to his older brother.

“Then, time to get up. We don’t want our mom to get angry, right?” Dongho freed himself from Jinho’s arms and raised his heavy body from small but comfortable bed groaning and yawning. He walked towards wardrobe placed across the bed and took out a black T-shirt and a pair of jeans. He threw them onto the bed and hugged his brother. They went down the wood stairs, Jinho in his brother’s lap and Dongho placed his little brother on one of the chairs circling the round table in the middle of the kitchen. His mother was cooking the last piece of pancake which Dongho liked the most. The smell made his stomach growl because of the lack of food in it. He hugged his mom from her back, resting his head on his mother’s shoulder and said

“Good morning”

“Good morning Dongho”. She said smiling at his son. When she finished cooking, she put the pancake onto the plate and the pan into the sink. She sat down the table amused by her both sons’ gaze at the pancakes hungrily.

“So you are free today, right? Daniel?”

“Daniel has to work today; I am the only one who has freedom.” Dongho said making a V sign and started to savor pancakes.

“Daniel came over yesterday night and he wanted to play with Jinho but he was too excited to play along even with Daniel.” She said raising her brows teasingly and kept grinning “He waited for you in front of the window all yesterday night until his eyelids couldn’t bear it anymore.” Dongho smiled with a mouth full of pancake and looked at his brother who was sitting next to him

“Hyung said we would go to the amusement park today” Jinho said clapping with his little hands and swinging his legs with excitement under the table.

“Yes, we will go but …………but I have something to do before we go there.” Dongho said afraid of the reaction his brother would give. Thankfully Jinho just pouted with his thin lips, he stopped clapping and swinging his legs. He looked at Dongho’s eyes disappointedly. Dongho felt too much affection to handle. He grinned, reaching out his brother and ruffled his hair.

“Just for one hour. I promise. Then I will come back and we will go wherever you want.” Dongho said struggling to wipe the disappointment on his brother’s face but Jinho kept pouting with a ready-to–cry face and Dongho decided to play his last card. He leaned down and whispered in his brother’s ear.

“And we will eat ice-cream you like most as much as you want. But this is a secret between you and me, don’t say anything to mom. OK?” Jinho’s eyes sparked with excitement and nodded pressing his little hands to his mouth. Dongho became satisfied with his victory. He started to savor his pancake before going up the stairs to bath and change his clothes. He had somewhere to go.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------

Dongho stared at the building in front of his eyes with amazement. _Wow,_ he thought. “THE HWANGS” was written with huge dark golden letters at the top of the building covered with black glass. After a few minutes of amazement, he stepped towards sensor fitted swing door made of glass. He entered the building and saw many people in suit showing their ID cards to pass across from turnstiles which let the people pass with cheerful beeps and green lights all around the very high ceilinged hall. He looked around with wide eyes and O shaped mouth. After a few minutes of silly amazement, he realized a man in black and chic suit approaching to him. The man asked Dongho politely when he came near enough

“How can I help you, mister?” Dongho trying to hide his amazement asked

“Is there someone here named Hwang Minhyun?” The man in black looked at him like he saw an alien. Dongho knew he asked the wrong question as soon as he saw the expression on the man’s face. He cleared his throat and said stretching out the watch

“Anyway, this watch belongs to Hwang Minhyun. Can you return it to him?” The man took the watch from Dongho’s hand and Dongho bowed to the man before turning his back and starting to walk towards the door. The man asked raising his hand

“Wait a moment. What should I say when I am asked about who you are?” Dongho turned his glance at the man and said

“Kang Dongho, my name is Kang Dongho” Dongho bowed again and turned his back to go out but he stopped and said “Aahhh wait, I think it will be better if you say Donald Trump” Dongho grinned and left the man behind him with a bewildered face.

\-----------

Minhyun was sitting in his office with his best friend. He couldn’t sleep all night thinking about what he should do. In the early morning, he had left Seongwoo’s house and he had gone to his father, apologized and told him that he would marry before slapping the door harshly. In a few minutes he got back the keys of his cars, credit cards, the name ‘Hwang’, the headline of CEO, the office…...

“So you are really marrying with Seo-Jun.” Seongwoo said to his best friend with amazement.

“No, I will not marry him” Minhyun said with a decisive and loud voice.

“I really can’t understand what you are thinking, Minhyun”

“I will marry to someone but not Seo-Jun”. Minhyun explained thinning his lips in determination.

“Please tell me you are joking. Have you gone crazy? Hwang Minhyun. What does that mean for god’s sake? What about your parents? Will they let you marry someone else?”

“I have thought about it all night Seongwoo, I can’t deal with my father since it is not a fair play. But all is fair in love and war and I have just realized it has been a war between my parents and me so far. I don’t want to marry Seo-Jun and I will not. If I marry him, my life will not be mine anymore and I will have to live a life I don’t want. I just need someone reliable, honest and clever and also who is willing to stay married with me for 6 months and divorce then.”

Seongwoo confused asked “Soooo, you are telling me it will be a fake marriage, aren’t you?”

“Yes, exactly. This is what I am saying and nobody will know about this fake marriage. Everyone should think it is love. ”

“Alright, next question. Why 6 months?”

“I need six months to start my own business and hopefully my parents will not force me to marry again. Divorce trauma or something like that.” Minhyun said winking his eye and clicking his tongue.

“What if he or she doesn’t want a divorce after 6 months?”

“That is why I need someone reliable and someone who is willing to sign a marriage contract. Anyway just tell me whether you will help me or not”

Seongwoo, surprised by his friend’s determination, grinning said “You don’t need to ask to know my answer” They stared at each other before pulling out their phones. After 2 hours of calling every person they could think, Seongwoo said

“Yaah Hwang Minhyun... What did you do to them? We have called all South Korea but when they heard your name, all of them hung up the phone on my face.” Minhyun gritting his teeth said

“I have spent thousands of dollars on them. May they choke death on it!”

“Hwang Minhyun, cursing doesn’t handle the situation now.”

“At least it soothes my anger” Minhyun snapped and Seongwoo rolled his eyes. Minhyun sighed taking his head between his hands

“Then …..”

“Then???...” Seongwoo waited curiously for Minhyun to keep up with a solution.

“There is just one way.”

“Don’t dare to pretend mysterious Minhyun, spit it out now”

“Marry me, Seongwoo” Minhyun said with a teasing grin on his face.

Seongwoo said disappointedly “Anyone in this universe won’t believe we are in love and you are not my type, you scumbag” Minhyun laughed at his friend’s cursing. Minhyun sighed leaning back the leather armchair

“Seongwoo, I am getting engaged tonight and we have a week before I am forced to choose the pants to wear under my groom’s suit.”

“Minhyun, we will be unable to settle the matter like that. We have to find someone who doesn’t know you and your filthy bed stories.” Seongwoo said clicking his fingers.

“Someone who doesn’t know me, someone reliable who won’t tell anybody about the fake marriage. Someone clever who can handle the situation. Someone honest who won’t violate the agreement and demand more money. And someone handsome.”

“Someone handsome?” Seongwoo grinned at his friend and kept “Why do you need someone handsome?”

“Nobody will believe me if I marry someone ugly, Seongwoo.”

“Yeah right, certainly you need someone handsome” Seongwoo kept teasing his friend. It was Minhyun’s turn to roll his eyes.

At that exact moment they heard a knock at the door and Mr. Jung, the secretary entered the office closing the glass door behind him.

“Mr. Hwang, a young man brought this just a moment ago and said this belongs to you” Minhyun looked at the secretary’s teasing face and then his hand and saw a silver watch.

“What is this? Watch?..” he tilted his head and looked at the watch frowning. Then Minhyun recalled yesterday night. Club, stars, punch, pain, Donald Trump… He smiled looking at the watch. And then something has changed in his head. He raised his head and said

“He brought the watch back. ……..He brought the watch back.” Seongwoo and Mr. Jung were trying to make sense of what Minhyun was murmuring. Minhyun suddenly turned his surprised face to Seongwoo

“This watch is worth of thousands of dollars but he brought it back. Someone reliable, honest, clever and…. and handsome” He was talking to himself smiling.

“Where is he now? Secretary Jung” Minhyun suddenly turned his body to his secretary and asked with the sparkles in his eyes

“ He has just left, Mr. Hwang”

“Did you ask his name?”

“He said his name was Kang Dongho and then said something like Donald Trump” Minhyun laughed loudly and immediately ran to the window to see where Dongho was. He saw Dongho was walking towards the bus station. Minhyun opened to the glass door and rushed out of the office. He ran towards the elevator and punched the button

“Co- come come come, damn it” this was the first time he cursed at elevators. He heard Seongwoo shouting “Minhyun, what is happening?” but he didn’t have time to explain. He made his way to the stairs and went down with his all strength and speed. When he finally made his way out of the building, he started to run towards the bus stop Dongho was waiting at.

The weather was really boiling hot. Dongho regretted wearing a black T-shirt that made the hot hotter. When he finally took cover under the shadow of the bus station with the ladies carrying umbrella as a protection from the boiling sun, he sighed with the relaxation of little coolness. He looked at his watch. The bus was about to come. Suddenly he realized people waiting in the station started to look at one direction murmuring something. Dongho turned his glances at the direction people were looking with their surprised faces and saw Hwang Minhyun running with his incredibly long legs towards the bus station. Dongho could swear he hadn’t known that someone could be so handsome while running. His long strands were falling onto his brows and then they were scattered around his forehead with every long and fast step.

Minhyun slowed down when he approached enough. Dongho was looking at him with wide eyes. _Cute_ Minhyun thought. _Dongho with perfect O shaped mouth, raised brows, opened wide light brown eyes._

“Yo-you brought the watch back” said Minhyun putting his hands onto his knees. He was out of breath.

“Yes, shouldn’t I?” Dongho asked with a puzzled expression. Minhyun breathed out and straightened looking into Dongho’s eyes and said

“No, it is not. Anyway …I –I just wanted to thank you.”

Minhyun tried to screw up his courage, Dongho looking into his eyes with a cute surprised face wasn’t helping though. He wetted his lips with the tip of his tongue and said

“There is a well-known café nearby. How about drinking a coffee or something cold? And that will give me a chance to thank you properly”

“Thank you for the offer, but I really have to go.” Dongho said looking at the bus arrived at the station a moment ago.

“I insist” Dongho turned his gaze to the man

“Really thanks. But you don’t need to thank for something like that. I really have to go” Dongho said thinking about his little brother waiting for him and bowed. He turned his broad back to Minhyun and started to walk towards to the bus which was waiting for the passengers to get on.

Minhyun not knowing what to do watched Dongho going towards _the damn bus._ He wouldn’t marry Seo-Jun, he wouldn’t lose the war against his father. He wouldn’t watch his victory chance sliding out of his hands; he would choose whom to marry. He shook his head to clear all thoughts, breathed deeply and then he did the last thing he should have. He raised his head and

“MARRY ME, KANG DONGHO” he shouted.


	3. The beginning

Dongho lowered his right foot he had prepared to step inside the bus near his left one. He could feel the bus driver’s curious gaze on him but he was rooted on the spot. For just a moment, he thought he was unable to comprehend fully though the words were echoing in his mind over and over. Marry me Kang Dongho… Marry me... Marry me. If his ears and brain weren’t playing a trick on him, literally the man whom he had met just a few hours ago was proposing to him at that exact moment. He felt something inside his chest but he couldn’t count on even his feelings now. Was it anger? He wanted to move but his limbs couldn’t respond to his commands. His feet were like glued to the floor. They were resisting moving.

He snapped out of his thoughts when he heard someone inside bus probably bus driver saying “Hey, aren’t you going to get on?” Dongho was just able to raise his hand looking at the closing door with a hiss and after a moment the bus started off with the passengers grumbling inside. He was left with his thoughts, his unfunctional limbs and a man who had proposed to him a moment ago. He looked at the bus leaving a thick and black smoke behind bewilderedly. And he continued to look until the bus lurked out of his sight. He sighed with anger gritting his teeth. When he finally collected his thoughts, he turned his glares at Minhyun and pressed his lips together hardly arching his brows as an attempt to make the taller male understand that was a bad joke. Tall and incredibly good looking in his indigo blue suit, Minhyun started to move towards Dongho who didn’t avert his eyes even once. He was really frustrated at this man and determined to give him a piece of his mind.

Minhyun could see Dongho pursing his lips into a thin line with an overwhelming anger. He could feel his pulse started to quicken frantically with his every step. One step one beat, one step two beats, one step four beats. God damn it._ Why did he propose a man he has met just a few hours ago? Why did he propose a man can knock over a bear with his punch?_ Minhyun thought. In fact, he wasn’t willing to be punched by this man now. But that wasn’t the case as he could see.

The cars were whizzing on the highway while people were passing by without paying any attention. When he finally reached Dongho who was literally harrumphing, they locked their eyes with each other and a few tense seconds passed before Minhyun asked gulping

“Dongho, can we talk for a moment?”

“This should have been the first sentence you uttered before proposing me in front of a busload of people.” Dongho retorted smiling crossly and turned his back starting to walk away as quickly as possible. For the first time, Minhyun thanked God for having long legs and for having courage. At least he hadn’t been punched yet, right? The taller one caught Dongho’s arm by the elbow and slightly squeezed it with his long fingers. Dongho looked down at Minhyun’s hand on his arm and narrowed his eyes smiling. What a bold movement Dongho thought. He fought with his urgent desire to punch this brave man.

“Just for 6 months” Minhyun’s long fingers started to sink into Dongho’s flesh when his grip tightened. He didn’t want Dongho to leave him. He was desperate. He needed Dongho. He needed this marriage. Dongho turned his gaze back to Minhyun from their clenched arms and yanked his arm off Minhyun’s hold. Minhyun’s arms started to swing loosely at his sides while Dongho kept walking again. Minhyun jogged after Dongho wondering where he found this courage and said with a haste

“Let me explain, please. I am sorry it is my fault. I shouldn’t have done that. I am really sorry but I need you. Just for 6 months, Dongho. This will be a fake marriage between you and me. Nobody will know about it. Nothing will happen between us. You will go on your own life and I will go on with mine. After 6 months you will want a divorce”

Dongho turned his gaze to his left and they caught each other’s eyes. Minhyun could see Dongho’s patience was wearing thin gradually.

“So, this is not a bad joke. You are serious” Dongho said with widely-opened eyes.

“Yes, marry me” Minhyun answered back immediately.

“Just for 6 months, Dongho. I need this marriage” He repeated. And taking a deep breath and blinking non-stop as always when he was anxious he kept

“I know it sounds crazy. But I need you. We will stay married for 6 months and you can get everything you want. House, car, money as much as you want…Everything… The only thing you have to do is to pretend you are in love with me. It is just a game. A love game”

“Correct me if I am wrong. You want me to stay married to you and pretend I am in love with you for 6 months. I can have anything I want in return for this fake marriage. Nobody will know about it and nothing will happen between us. After 6 months we will divorce.”

Minhyun nodded swallowing and wetting his lower lip with the tip of his tongue. Dongho stepped towards Minhyun and grabbed two sides of his jacket and pulled Minhyun closer. Minhyun could feel Dongho’s hot breath on his face.

“On the top of that, you want me to marry a man I have just known literally for a few hours. Open your ears and listen to me carefully, Mr. Hwang. At that exact moment, I am really trying hard to hold myself back not to punch your face, Hwang Minhyun or whoever you are. If this is a joke, it is really shit but if it is not a joke, let me tell you something.”

Minhyun could see the anger flickering in the shorter man’s eyes. Minhyun could swear his glares could tear everything off.

“I am really disgusted by people like you who count on their bank accounts too much and who can taunt someone about marriage. And yes this is really crazy. Not to mention you want to marry someone you don’t even know. And lastly, if you follow me once more, I will not hold myself back. Did you get what I am saying?” He left Minhyun’s jacket’s lapel pushing him away and Minhyun staggered backward open-mouthed.

Dongho turned his back and started to walk away leaving defeated and resigned Minhyun behind. He hailed a taxi and told the taxi driver his address. He decided not to think about this mad man. As soon as possible he wanted to go home to spend his free day with the one he loved most in this universe.

\---------------------------------------------

Dongho knocked at the wood door and as soon as the door was opened, he fell back to the ground onto his butt. He groaned with the pain on his back and freed himself from a pair of arms.

“Yahh… Jinho” Dongho said putting his hands on each side to support himself to stand up.

“You are late. Hyung.” Jinho retorted pouting.

“No, I am not” Dongho defended himself shaking his clothes from the dust and looked down at his brother.

“Are you ready to go?” he kept turning his gaze at his mother smiling and waiting at the doorsill.

“Yes I am ready, let’s go hyung” Jinho said with a voice lacking patience. He grabbed Dongho’s hand with his small ones and started to tug his older brother. While Dongho was resisting the small thing tugging at him, he heard his mother shouting behind them.

“Take care and don’t be late” and then closing of the wood door.

They were looking at the colorful fun rides with amazement half an hour later. Jinho was clapping his hands with excitement. Children with their father or mother were running around with their vivacious laughter. Everywhere was full of the chuckle of happiness which made Dongho smile. Cheerful songs could be heard from every corner of the park. Every fun ride was full of its capacity. Dongho couldn’t remember the last time he spent time at an amusement park. He bent his knees to sit and grabbed his brother’s thin arms with his huge hands.

“Now, which one?” Jinho looked around with his cute widely opened eyes in excitement preparing his finger to point. Dongho was utterly glad to see that excitement in his little brother’s eyes. He could consent to bestow his all free days to his brother if he would see sparkles in his eyes again.

*

It was getting darker and darker. Colors of the fun rides had become undistinguishable with bare eyes although they were lighted up with thousand tones of vibrant colors. Compared to morning, the number of people had decreased to large extent but it could still be counted as crowded. There were too many children laughing, eating ice cream, and tugging their parents backward and forwards. When the stop signal of bumper cars rang with earsplitting sound, Dongho hugged his brother and got off from the small car walking towards the exit. As soon as Jinho was down, he started to pull Dongho’s shirt and pointed a huge fun ride mechanism making screaming people swaying from side to side. Dongho grabbed Jinho’s hand and made him turn his face to Dongho.

“Jinho-yah, it is time to go back. And this is not suitable for children at your age.” He said pointing the warning written on the plaque near the huge mechanism.

“Let’s not make mom worried” Jinho pouted and Dongho sat down to be able to look into his brother’s eyes and kept

“If we go home now, we will come here again as soon as possible. OK?” Jinho raised his head chuckling in happiness and looked at Dongho.

“Pinky promise?”

“Yes, pinky promise” Dongho stretched his pinky finger folding his other fingers. Jinho crossed his finger over Dongho’s.

“Let’s go” Dongho said grabbing the small hand. They started to walk. The bus station wasn’t far away from the amusement center.

“Did you have fun today?” Dongho asked his brother. Jinho swinging his free hand looked up his hyung and said

“Yes” with a cheerful voice. Dongho couldn’t hold his chuckle back and whispered

“Don’t tell anything to mommy about the ice creams we had eaten today. OK?” Jinho hummed nodding his small head. They reached the bus station and started to wait. Jinho put his head against Dongho’s arm and Dongho pulled his brother into his lap patting his hair.

“Dongho” Dongho heard someone calling out his name and turned his face towards the voice. He stood up from the seat and landed Jinho down.

“Jisung hyung, Sungwoon hyung” Dongho smiled at his friends after pulling them into a tight hug.

“How are you doing? Dongho”

“Fine. You?”

“You know; same” Ha Sungwoon said dismissively.

“What are you doing here?” Yoon Jisung asked Dongho switching his glares between Dongho and Jinho

“I came to the park with my brother” he said to his friends raising Jinho’s hand holding his own. Jisung patted Dongho’s back and commented with a sigh

“I thought he was your son. I would almost punch your face thinking –waah he didn’t let us know his marriage not to mention a child-” Dongho let out a loud laughter when Sungwoon elbowed Jisung’s ribcages. He groaned with pain and turned his face to the shortest male

“Yaaah what the fff..” Sungwoon didn’t let Jisung complete the sentence

“Don’t dare to swear near a child. And you are his friend, you should have known he had a brother, idiot” Sungwoon said rolling his eyes.

“How should I know?” Jisung argued back. “Maybe by sleeping less when we met with our friends” Sungwoon snapped at his housemate bending his knees and patted Jinho’s head.

“It is not same there. No fun you know; the university. We miss you Dongho” Jisung said while watching Sungwoon patting Jinho. Dongho couldn’t say anything. He had his words stuck in his throat so he chose just to smile at his friend’s sincerity. Sungwoon stood up and said

“He was very small and now he is a grown-up man. Children are really growing fast” Dongho grinning and looking at his brother said

“Yes, he is 7 now.” Jinho was looking around lost his interest in adults’ conversation. Jisung throwing his hand over Sungwoon shoulders said

“We have moved to a new house, you should really come over one day, Dongho” Dongho grinning said

“I will certainly come.” At that exact moment, Jinho tugged at Dongho’s hand and he yelled. “Hyuuungg. Cat…” In a split second Dongho felt the small hand sliding out of his hand, he heard a brake squeak and then crashing sound.

He gasped for breath. Despite an unbearable pain squeezing his heart, he found the courage to turn his face to the road clenching his hands until they were blue. He saw an image which he would sacrifice his life not to see it. A small body lying on the road in the pool of blood.

*

Dongho stepped forward gasping for breath. Every step was making the scene bloodier, more real, and more excruciating. His limbs were shaking violently as if they didn’t want to move forward anymore. When he approached enough to see Jinho’s face, he collapsed onto his knees in the middle of the blood-soaked road putting his hand under his little brother’s head. The concrete floor was hard right? The blood was polluting the small white shirt. He tried to clean the blood stains all over the little thin fabric of shirt with his free hand.

“Jinho-yah! Open your eyes look at me. Hyung is here” He hoped Jinho would listen to him and would open his eyes. He waited for a small reaction; just a small movement but there was none. he felt the hot liquid spreading across his hand and Jinho’s small body as Dongho tried to wipe off the blood. He looked at his bloody hand making him want to throw up.

“Jinho yah I told you to open your eyes. Mom is waiting. Jinho-yah” He whispered patting Jinho’s hair washed in blood. Without realizing he felt hot tears rolling down his face. Something was trying to pull off his heart from his chest and destroy it. _Not this time_ he thought. _Not again…Please… Not again… Not again. _ He heard Jisung shouting at Sungwoon and telling him to call the ambulance.

“No please. No. No. No. ” he exclaimed grabbing Jinho’s small head and pressed it against his chest. He wasn’t able to recognize his surroundings anymore. The only thing he felt is the unbearable pain in his chest. He didn’t know how long he sat down hugging Jinho’s small body before hearing the grisly and shrieking noise of ambulance. He couldn’t see anything and anybody except Jinho’s small figure until Jisung grabbed his arms and hauled him upwards “Look at me, Dongho. Look at my eyes. He will be fine. Trust me” with a sharp voice. He nodded not being able to look at Jisung and biting his lips too hard to draw blood. While paramedics were lifting Jinho’s body placing him onto the stretcher, he dashed away his tears. His little brother would be fine. He believed that. He wanted to believe that and pulled out his phone to call the only person he could think.

\-------------------------------------

Seongwoo looked at his reflection on the mirror for the last time and tried to tidy his strands. He had chosen a black suit which made him look more elegant and mysterious for Minhyun’s engagement. He let out a defeated sigh still looking at his reflection and left his bedroom turning off the lights. The tall man made his way towards the main door to leave for the engagement party at the Hwangs estate and closed the combination-locked door making the keypad, placed on the left of the door, spread a red light

When he made out of the building, he got into his car and started it off. He was feeling an excruciating ache in his head. His temples were throbbing and he didn’t know the reason. Maybe because of the shots he had drunk with the blonde girl, maybe because of his unwillingness to witness Minhyun’s unhappiness. What could they do? This war was against Mr. Hwang, the man who owned half of South Korea. They had lost this war without even trying to win and Seongwoo had to watch Minhyun, his best friend losing it. With these not-so-fascinating thoughts in his head, he suddenly pressed the brake after pulling the car and turning the engine off. He sighed and closed his eyes leaning on the headrest. After a few minutes of resting, the tall man got off the car deciding to drink coffee and made his way towards the small café beside the main road. He opened the glass door with a smooth click and walked towards the counter with the hope of making the headache subside a little.

“Welcome” a tall boy said with a gummy smile.

“Can I have the strongest coffee you have, please?” Seongwoo said with a sigh leaning on the counter and rubbing his temples with closed eyes. _This damn headache._

“Of course, please wait here a little, it will be prepared soon” the tall boy said with a voice spreading happiness. When Seongwoo stopped rubbing his head, he opened his eyes with a sigh and looked at the collar name tag attached under the tall boy’s shoulder: Lai Guanlin

“Daniel Hyung, a black espresso” Guanlin called out to a male facing away.

“OK. I am preparing” Daniel said with a cheerful tone. Seongwoo was surprised at how they could be still so energetic and happy in this late hour after working probably at least for 10 hours. _Some people are really fascinating_ Seongwoo thought. The said man Daniel turned his face to Seongwoo and bowed smiling with his bunny teeth.

Seongwoo froze. Literally, everything froze for just a moment. This man could be the most beautiful thing he had ever laid his eyes on. He was tall and he had broad shoulders and muscular built. His round face with chubby and round cheeks was perfectly balanced with his full lips. The upper lip trying to cover his front teeth but failing. His light brown hair falling onto his eyebrows was making him look more attractive. He was the definite description of perfection and Seongwoo couldn’t fight his urge desire to stare. He forgot the ache in his head maybe thanks to the smell of the coffee lingering in the air or thank to this man smiling at him.

The noisy ringtone of a phone snapped Seongwoo out of his thoughts. After a moment he saw Daniel pulling out the phone from his pocket and answering the call with a smile on his face probably after looking at the ID. The phone was pressed between Daniel’s shoulder and ear while he was trying to prepare a black espresso for him. Seongwoo felt something strange. He couldn’t identify the reason but he felt a strong desire to be on all ears. 

Daniel said “Dongho, are you trying to make me turn green with envy?” with a grin on his face. His cousins were having a great time at the amusement park and he was working his ass off. Just a moment later, Daniel’s beautiful grin faded away and the glass in his hands fell down to the well-cleaned white floor scattering all around and leaving dark coffee stains and pieces of glass behind.

“Dongho! What happened? Dongho!!” Daniel spoke in a loud voice. He stood aghast without uttering any word for 30 seconds but then he shouted at the phone “Listen to me. Where are you now? Tell me where you are now, Dongho!!!” pointing out every word.

“I am coming” he clasped his hands behind to take off the apron quickly and he threw it onto the counter running out of the glass door leaving Seongwoo and Guanlin behind worried.

\--------------------------------------------

Minhyun heard a knock at the door. He was sitting at his armchair in his bedroom front on to the big pool covering the front garden. Someone opened the door; he didn’t need to look at the door to see who it was. His mother with her well-dyed wine red hair and a chic dress which was chosen among the thousands for Minhyun’s engagement.

“Haven’t you gotten ready yet?” Minhyun lifted his head and “Soon I will be” he said dismissively. She hummed and turned to leave. When his mother pressed the door handle to close it, he called out

“Mom” she looked at her son from the doorway without leaving the handle and asked “Yes?”. “This is the first time you don’t back me up” 

“Do you want to know the reason?” she said leaving the door handle and closing the door behind her and she started to walk slowly towards Minhyun in her classy high-heeled shoes creating annoying ticking sound.

“Yes” Minhyun retorted back.

He sat down on the bed and his mother sat near him. She held her son’s hand looking at his eyes. _In an almost affectionate way_ Minhyun thought. _Almost_. He fought his desire to yank his hand free from his mother’s hold.

“I have been dreaming of the day I would see your marriage since you were a child. I have counted on you about you would find someone who will be suitable for our family.” 

“I would if you let me” he said still trying not to pull his hand away.

“You are a grown-up man, Minhyun and look at your around once. It is full of ordinary, simple, shadowy men and women.”

“You don’t know any of them” Minhyun argued back.

“It doesn’t matter. I couldn’t wait until the day one of them would be the reason to embarrass our family.”

“What about love, mom? I don’t love Kim Seo-Jun”

“So I can assume that you think I was in love with your father while we were getting married but it is not like what you think. The most crucial thing is the family tree. Love is for the stupids, Minhyun and it is destined to be consumed one day. You don’t even want to hear what people are talking about us because of you. Thanks to this marriage, our image in all Korean society will get better. Both your father and me will be happy.”

Minhyun turned his face away from his mother and smiled bitterly. “Yeah, this is really big deal, right? Society. What about my happiness, then?”

“Kim Seo-Jun is a man suitable for our family. You both match each other well. And it is your time to be a truly-grown-up man, Minhyun. We have been just ensuring it” she stood up to leave. Minhyun rubbed his head to appease the ache; she stopped in the middle of the room and kept with a smile turning her face to her son

“I am sure you will thank me one day.” It was the last drop. Minhyun could feel the smoldering anger inside his chest.

“You thought exactly like that while you were sending Minki off abroad by force, didn’t you? Mom. He would be grateful to you, he would thank you one day.”

“Minhyun!” she retorted scowling at his son. “Your language!”

“I am just asking” was the last sentence she heard before slamming the door harshly. Minhyun heaved a sigh.

“You think we will be grateful to you one day. But we are sorry, mom. That day will never come.” He stood up and looked at the people in chic suits and dresses gathering around the pool to celebrate Minhyun’s unwanted-fate from his glass wall covering his room from south to north.

\-----------------------------------

Dongho felt the hard and cold wall behind him and slid down slowly drawing his knees up. He didn’t have strength to stand anymore. He looked at the white walls surrounding him thinking he hated the smell in here. The intense smell of penicillin. Running of nurses in green, the beeping noise that could be heard from every room, the earsplitting squeal of ambulance reporting another life was about to slide away from this world’s surface. Cold, matt, blood freezing. Dongho knew Jinho hated the hospitals as much as he hated. Again his gaze lingered on his bloody hand. His little cute, most precious human being… His little brother’s blood. Hot liquid started to fall down from his face unintentionally and spoke to himself.

“I should have held him tighter. Harder. I shouldn’t have left his hand.” And he jumped on his foot turning his face towards to the wall and started to punch the wall hard. Daniel sitting on seat stood up and ran with his all might.

“Dongho!!! Stop it” Daniel shouted. “Dongho!!” when he approached him, he held Dongho’s shoulder squeezing and shrugged him away from the damn wall leaking blood on its smooth cold surface.

“For god’s sake” he trudged towards Dongho and took his cousin’s hand blooding and bruising heavily to examine. “Oh my God, you idiot” Daniel hissed biting his lower lip. Dongho gripped his shirt with his left hand and buried his face into Daniel’s shoulder and Daniel let him pour out all feelings. He patted his friend’s head letting him cry as much as he wanted, not being able to prevent his own silent tears, either. 

They had been sitting at the seat placed in front of the surgery room for 2 hours. The waiting was torture for his soul. He leaned his head against the wall and closed his eyes for a moment. The image was the same; small body lying on the road and blood stains on the thin and small shirt. He opened his eyes not standing to see the same scene over and over. Daniel felt Dongho’s discomfort and said throwing his arm over his friend’s shoulders as an attempt to comfort him“He will be fine, I am sure. Stop thinking and imagining bad things. Hmm?” Dongho nodded with a sigh.

After another terrifying half an hour, the glass door of the operation room was finally opened with a sliding noise and a doctor in green came out. Dongho gasped for breath but was able to run towards the doctor, Daniel behind him with the hope of hearing something good. The gray-haired doctor took off the respirator with a sigh and said after breathing out

“Unfortunately the broken ribs impaired the tissues of some crucial organs and he had already lost too much blood when he arrived here. His heart stopped once but we managed to re-pulsate it and we made blood transfusion for excessive blood loss. He will rest in the intensive care unit until tomorrow and we will operate another surgery for the un-repaired tissues”

Daniel squeezing Dongho’s shoulder said “That’s, you are saying he will be fine right??”

“I am sorry but we can’t say anything certain until the end of the surgery that will be operated tomorrow and I want to have an appointment with his_ guardian_” 

“It is me” Dongho said with haste. "I-I am his brother."

“Could we talk privately in my room a little?” Dongho looked at Daniel’s eyes with a worried face and started to walk behind the doctor. When they turned the bend, the doctor opened a white door opening into a room consisting of one wood table, several armchairs placed in front of this table. The old doctor gestured Dongho to sit down while he was wearing his clean white apron. After wearing his apron, he sat down on his armchair with a sigh. The old man said “I will keep it short and get right down to it.” The doctor gulped with sadness and kept

“Mr. Kang, you have to pay the hospital bill until the surgery tomorrow otherwise, we can’t operate it and I am really sorry to say that but your brother can’t stand it one more day”

*

Dongho closed the door leaving old doctor inside the room. _Whatever happens, he would protect his brother. They would get out of here happily whatever it costs_. He returned to the front of the surgery room. Daniel was sitting at the same seat and Dongho sat down near his cousin drawing his knees up and wrapping his arms around them. A moment later, he heard his mother’s voice and saw her running towards them. She stopped in front of Dongho who stood up but couldn’t raise his head to look into his mother’s eyes and then he felt a slap on his face.

“I told you to take care of him” She yelled out of her lungs. Daniel hissed and shouted “Aunt!!!!!”

“I am sorry” was the only thing Dongho could say Then he felt his mother’s head against his chest sobbing heavily. He could feel the hot tears being poured onto his shirt. “Ssssshhhhh, he will be fine. I promise I will take him out of here healthily” he wrapped his arms around his mother.

“She can’t handle that, Daniel. Not again.” Dongho kept looking at Daniel’s eyes “I can’t handle that, either. I have to do something” They were walking in the garden illuminated with street lamps.

“This is the only option.” Dongho said as if he was trying to convince himself.

“Dongho! What option are you talking about? Look! whatever you have to do, let’s do it together. Hmmm?” Daniel said. He couldn’t make any sense of what Dongho was talking about.

“It is not something we can do together, Daniel” Dongho turned his gaze at his friend.

“You are scaring me, Dongho!”

“I have to go, I can’t wait anymore. I don’t have time” Dongho started to run towards the exit of the hospital ignoring Daniel’s shouting. He beckoned a taxi and said

“To the Hwangs Estate”

\-------------------------------------------------

Minhyun, his mother, and father were welcoming the quests accompanied with classical music masterpieces. Cocktail tables wrapped with white high-quality fabric and white ribbons were located poolside for every guest. Waiters in their chic suits were trying to treat what they had on their round tray carried over their shoulders to the ladies and gentlemen. 

Music had started to press Minhyun’s soul as hours were ticking away. His head was throbbing maybe because of the noise maybe because of dirty glares he had won from his soon-to-be-fiancé all night. The clinking liquor glass, polite laughter screaming wealth, ladies competing in fashion, businessmen searching for ideal collaborators. All of them were here to celebrate this damn engagement.

Minhyun saw Seo-jun trudging towards him with his long legs and when he approached enough, he whispered to Minhyun’s ear “I said to you one night stands wouldn’t make me give up on marrying you, I said to you I wouldn’t give up on you whatever you did. Try to cheer up a little. This is our engagement party, Hwang Minhyun or should I say my dear husband?” he said smirking and this smirk made Minhyun squeeze his fists.

“Ladies and gentlemen” Mr. Hwang called out drawing all attention onto him. “Today my dream came true. I would die in disappointment if I couldn’t witness this day. I want to see my son Hwang Minhyun with Kim Seo-jun for life. I hope their togetherness will last forever.” Everybody started to clap. Minhyun gritting his teeth looked down at the rings in his father’s hand. He sighed and took off the ring from its box and made Seo-jun wear the ring. Seo-jun grinning took off the ring from its box. Minhyun stretched his hand and then they heard the bodyguard calling out someone.

“Sir! Please, sir you can’t enter if you don’t have an invitation card.”

Everybody turned their gaze at the man who was standing across the poolside.

Mr. Hwang asked “What is happening there?” with a confused expression. On the other hand, Dongho locking his eyes with Minhyun who was too surprised to react shouted loud enough to make everybody there hear it:

“HWANG MINHYUN!!!!!!! I HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT YOUR PROPOSAL…….. AND I ACCEPT IT”

Kim Seo- Jun said with a worried face “What does that mean Minhyun? What proposal is he talking about?” and Kang Dongho was the one who responded to these questions.

“MARRIAGE PROPOSAL” he said with a decisive voice. Minhyun suddenly started to run into the crowd towards Dongho and the last thing he heard was the click sound of a fallen ring. When he came near Dongho, he entwined his fingers with Dongho’s and said against the crowd.

“I am sorry but this engagement will not happen.” The last person Minhyun saw before running with the man who had saved him twice was Seongwoo, his hands in his pockets, and he was trying to hide his smirk.


	4. It is over

They started to run in the backyard full of tall trees and colorful flowers lightened with huge lambs that could only be seen in ancient castles. Dongho threw a glance at their interlocked hands while running and trying not to bump into a tree.

“Let go of my hand, I can walk without your holding it.” Dongho said with a frustrated tone. Minhyun with a confused face “What?”

“My hand!!!” Dongho pointed out raising their entwined hands to the air. Minhyun leaving Dongho’s hand free with a blush on his cheeks said “You really have great time inception.” He was smiling with a relieved face like someone managed to survive a war.

“I got it now; you were trying to get rid of this engagement, right?” Dongho said with an incredulous expression.

“You are really intelligent!!” Minhyun snapped back with sarcasm and kept “I am really wondering what you thought about the reason for my eagerness to marry you.”

“First sight love, maybe” Dongho teased him with an anguished smile looking around and he saw a huge iron garage door moving upwards.

“I am not in a mood to laugh at your bad jokes; I will not be surprised if my dad comes out of the house with a pump-rifle to shoot us to death. So, just once without resisting do what I say and get in the car.”

“Where are we going?” Dongho asked stopping to move.

“Just get in” Minhyun said with his getting-thinner-and-thinner-patience while holding the car door open. Dongho rolled his eyes and got in the car hastily while Minhyun sat down on the driver’s seat in a hurry and started it off.

“I would almost be engaged” Minhyun talked to himself with a smile on his face and kept giving short glances at the man sitting near the driver’s seat. 

“With Seo-jun” he let out a relieved sigh turning his gaze at Dongho again for a short time and said

“You have saved my life twice”

“I really don’t have interest in being your full- time-saver.” The shorter male snapped back and

“I just need money. Now… As soon as possible.” he said without looking at Minhyun.

“I am just wondering. What changed in a few hours? As much as I remember you are disgusted by the people like me who count on their bank accounts” Minhyun said turning his gaze at Dongho with an answer-expecting face. Meanwhile, Dongho just gritted his teeth and stayed silent watching the blurring trees and buildings. That was the last sentence uttered before the drive was buried in silence.

After half an hour, Minhyun left a briefcase full of money into Dongho’s lap who was sitting in the car for ten minutes. _Life is too much easier for some people_ he thought looking at the case._ Signing some papers is enough to have a bag full of money._

“Exactly as much as you want. If it is not enough, we can get more tomo---” Minhyun said pulling Dongho out of his thoughts.

“It is enough” Dongho cut him off closing the bag and letting a sigh he kept “What will we do now?”

“That is the plan. If my dad doesn’t shoot me to death before I can find time to explain, I will talk about you and I will tell him that I love you and want to marry you.

“And he will allow??”

“I don’t know. He wants me to marry all in all. I don’t think he will care about who it is. If we manage to marry, you know the rules. We will stay married for six months and then divorce” Minhyun said without leaving his eyes from the road. Dongho turned his head to the window and started to watch quickly -flowing street lamps. Minhyun realized Dongho’s silence

“What happened? Is there something you didn’t like?”

“No. It is just strange. You know…This all fake marriage thing and I really don’t know how to explain it to my family”

“I know it is hard but think it as a game. This will make it easier.” Dongho didn’t answer and Minhyun kept with an anxious voice thinking Dongho would give up. “Dongho, I am asking for the last time. Are you in or out?” Dongho turned his gaze at Minhyun and then the bag in his lap. _There is no other way_ he thought.

“I took this” pointing the bag, Dongho said “And I have no other option.” He sighed and kept “Let’s give it a shot” Minhyun satisfied with the answer he heard nodded.

Dongho turned his eyes to Minhyun again and asked gulping “Can you do me one more favor?” Minhyun was astonished by this man’s handsomeness one more time and felt the blush on his cheeks because of the not-so-close-closeness.

But….But _there is something else, something wrong in his eyes _Minhyun thought. It was pain… Yes, pain could be seen in Dongho’s eyes clearly. That made Minhyun feel uncomfortable. He tried to resist his urge to hug the shorter male to destroy all the pain, causing Dongho to look at him like that and he wondered whether it is related to Dongho’s accepting the proposal. He wanted to ask so many questions starting with the bandage wrapped around his right hand but instead, he said without stopping to look at Dongho’s eyes

“Sure. What is it?”

*

“Here?” Minhyun asked looking around and trying to make sense of the place. It seemed like a forest.

“Yes, just give me 5 minutes. I will come back” Dongho said and Minhyun turned the engine off leaving the headlights on. Dongho opened the door and got out and disappeared into the forest. Meanwhile, Minhyun looked around once more. There were no houses, no buildings, just streetlamps lined up beside the earth road. He looked at the watch. It was 4 a.m. which meant it had been 5 hours since he had run away with Dongho. The tall male rested his head on the steering wheel and closed his eyes thinking of the events and calculating what he should say to his father. He raised his head and rubbed his face with his hands. Had he really done the right thing? Deceiving everyone? Lying about the marriage? With the hope of getting rid of these thoughts, he got out of the car and felt a chilly wind made him tremble. He sat on the car’s front bumper looking upwards at the sky. It was getting lighter blue as time passed. He stepped towards the direction Dongho went wondering why they came here, a forest.

After a few steps, he stopped with a wide-opened mouth. He had made sense of the place at last. It wasn’t a forest. It was a graveyard.

Dongho made his way towards the forest where he had come hundreds of times in these two years. Every time he got exhausted, every time he got happy, every time he got sad, every time he got angry, every time he got too tired to go on …He could recall every rock on the road, every tree stretching towards the sky, every person visiting here, and every name written on stones to remind the living ones who laid there. The sun leaving an orange line on the east was about to rise and that made seeing the names easy for Dongho’s eyes.

He stopped in front of the stone he wanted to see and let out a sigh raising his head to look at the name. Kang Jisuk …

“It has been long time, right?.... Dad…” he looked at his hands biting his lips and closed his eyes. “Are you OK? I am not OK if you ask me. I really miss you. In fact, we really miss you. Mom is crying every night looking at your pictures on the wall, she doesn’t want us to see her crying but you know I have good ears……… Are you angry with me? I know you are……” his voice turned into a whisper and he couldn’t utter a word for a few seconds.

“I am sorry, dad.” The gentle but cold breeze grazing Dongho’s bare skin made him shiver.

“I am sorry for having tattoos done without asking your permission” he smiled bitterly and kept ignoring the chilly wind. 

“I am sorry for using your credit card to throw a party. You don’t remember, right? But I remember. You had to give half of your wage to the bank.” Tears started to fall down.

“I am sorry for shouting at you to study music at the university. But I didn’t know back then it wasn’t worth hurting you” 

“I am sorry for making mom cry today.”

“And I am sorry……………” he gasped for breath.

“I am sorry for not being able to protect Jinho” he started to sob but kept ignoring his tears falling down non-stop

“I am sorry for accepting a fake marriage. But you know, right? There is no way to save him. Just for six months. Forgive me, dad, please forgive me” he shrugged his tears away and looked at the name once more. He knew his father would forgive him. He had always been an affectionate man. He had always forgiven his son whatever he did. When Dongho had broken the neighbor’s window... when he had picked a fight in the school... when he skipped the school to go to the beach... when he had tattoos without asking... when he left the house to study music…Every time… He knew his father would forgive him again.

But Dongho didn’t know there was one more person who was listening to him; a man who ran away from his own engagement a few hours ago. 

Minhyun turned back with quick steps and got on the car. He leaned his head on the headset and breathed out. Although he didn’t know the reason, He didn’t want Dongho to see him listening. He didn’t want Dongho to know he heard everything he had said to his father. Maybe because he thought Dongho would be angry. It was something special and Minhyun shouldn’t have heard any word.

*

Dongho heaved a sigh when he closed the door of the accounting office in the hospital. He left the handle and leaned on the closed door. The sun had risen after they left the graveyard with Minhyun. He looked at the yellow rays leaking from the huge window and causing the white floor to look more vibrant. _Jinho will be fine… Mom will be fine…. Everything will be just fine_ he thought and started to walk towards the elevator.

Daniel jumped on his foot as soon as he saw Dongho walking towards them.“Yah Dongho. Where were you? She asked you a million times and I couldn’t give a proper answer.” Dongho looked at his mother’s small figure sleeping on the seat leaned on the wall.

“I just needed to see someone” Dongho said without leaving his gaze on his mother.

Minhyun knocked at the wood door of the room he had just entered in urgent situations. This was urgent, right? At last, he would have to face with his parents about the events at the engagement party. After he heard his dad’s angry “Come in”, he opened the door and saw his mother sitting on one of the leather armchairs located across the wood table, his father reading some papers carefully and a man in a suit standing beside his dad. Minhyun was sure he saw this man somewhere. Ohhh!! wait… he was the family lawyer. Shit!!

“Oh come in, Minhyun. We were just talking about you.” His father said with a serious tone. Minhyun gulped closing the door behind him. He looked at his mother and realized they hadn’t changed their clothes which meant they had waited for Minhyun all night.

“Dad!” 

Minhyun stepped back when he heard his father’s slamming his fist on the table.

“Who do you think you are? What the hell do you think you are doing? Disgracing us?” he turned his gaze at the lawyer and said in frustration.

“Tell me, lawyer! What should I do for a disinheritance lawsuit?

“Yah Junwoo. Calm down. What are you talking about?” his mother said with an anxious tone

“I know very well what I am talking about.” Minhyun was struck with consternation. He asked in a daze.

“You will really disinherit me?”

“Why are you so surprised? Hwang Minhyun? You should have thought that before you had held your one night stand’s hand and ran away from your engagement.”

“He is not my one-night-stand. I will explain everything, Dad. I love him and I want to marry him.”

“You? …Love?... What do you know about love? You don’t know anything except messing around this club, that club. If Seo-Jun was my son, I swear I would shoot you to death.” His father’s voice rose higher. Meanwhile, Minhyun was on the edge. He could feel the anger spreading in his body. He breathed out with the hope of holding himself back.

“I told you I didn’t love Seo-Jun million times. Have you ever listened to me once? Before you forced me to engage with Seo-jun, I proposed to him. I love him and I will marry him”

“Why didn’t you tell me you love someone else before?”

“I was scared of your reactions.” Minhyun started to shout.

“You? Scared? Come off it” his father shouted back shrugging his hand in the air.

“Alright. Stop it now” Minhyun’s mother said. She turned to Minhyun and asked “Who is he?”

Minhyun sighed and said “He is not like us. I mean…..I mean he doesn’t have loads in the banks or cars and a _respectful_ family. He is a worker”

“What!!!” his mother yelled with a horrified tone.

“I was scared of that exact reaction” Minhyun rolled his eyes.

“How am I supposed to react when you want to marry a worker?” His father covered his face with his hands to calm down and turned his face to his wife saying “Seo-Eun ah. Just a moment.” Then he turned to his son and said with a loud voice “Is it true? You love him?”

“Yes, I love him” Minhyun said without thinking. His father was looking into his eyes searching for a sign of lie.

“What are you talking about? Hwang Minhyun. You can’t marry someone like him.” His mother started to shout this time.

“Stop it, now.” Minhyun was surprised to hear his father’s angry voice. He was more surprised to realize that his anger wasn’t for him but for his mother.

“No! I will not.” She yelled out of her lungs.

“You were angry with me just a moment ago. And now when your son wants to marry a worker, you have changed your mind?” She turned to Minhyun ignoring her husband.

“If you marry him, I will be the one who disinherits you.” She said and turned her back to leave the room slapping the door.

Minhyun gritted his teeth and turned to his father who was looking at the slapped door “Whatever you do, I will marry Dongho” Minhyun said meaning every word of it and went out. When he closed the main door, he breathed out and got in his car to take the road towards Seongwoo’s house.

*

The screen on the wall was turned off after 2 hours of unbearable waiting. Daniel and Dongho looked at each other while his mother was already in front of the sliding door. The doctors in green came out and Dongho held his breath. One of them took off the white mask and said

“The surgery was very successful. We managed to repair all damaged tissues. According to our guess, he can be discharged from the hospital in 5 days. His being too young will accelerate the healing process”

The doctor tapped his hand on Dongho’s shoulder with a smiling face and went. Dongho felt his mother’s head on his chest and he wrapped his arms around her and said

“It is over”

“It is over” he repeated for himself this time and let out a relieved sigh.

*****

The small café was bursting at seams. Couples being flirtatious, office workers reading some papers, university students taking notes while drinking their coffees, friends chatting …

“Daniel, one coffee mocha, one espresso with a muffin” Dongho said with haste. He shot a glance at Guanlin who was clearing the table high school students had left a moment ago and looked at his watch. It was 1.28 p.m. which meant the time to leave came. He clasped his hands behind him to untangle the knot. After taking his apron off, Dongho turned his face to Daniel who was trying to prepare orders at a hurried pace.

“Niel!! I am leaving. Can you deal with it?” Dongho asked with a worried face.

“Hmmm. I can. Don’t worry. You have to go. See you” Daniel smiled at him without leaving the glass in his hand. Dongho made his way towards the manager’s office, he knocked at the door and heard Mr. Park’s “Come in.” He opened the wood door without getting a foot inside said “Mr. Park, you know Jinho is being discharged today. May I go to the hospital now?” Mr. Park raising his head from the papers on the table and smiling

“Of course, you can go. Don’t come tomorrow morning. You can have a day free”

“Thank you, Mr. Park. Have a nice day.” Dongho closed the door behind after bowing.

“Guanlin! Daniel! See you.” He waved at his friends who were smiling at him in return. When Dongho closed the glass door with a smooth click, he breathed out loudly. The sun was sparkling in the sky not letting a cloud to create a shadow. He looked at the whizzing cars, walking people, the crowdedness of the city. Without waiting a moment more, he hailed the first taxi he saw and said the hospital’s name after getting on.

……………………..

When he laid his eyes on the room number 364, Dongho heard a thin shouting noise coming inside the room

“Jonghyun hyung, you are cheating. Scissors cut the rocks, so I won it.”

“Jinho-yah No! No! Rocks break scissors, so I won it.” He heard a grumbling noise again “Rock-paper-scissors…. Rock-paper-scissors.” Dongho couldn’t fight with his laughter anymore and knocked at the door.

“Hi” Dongho said not trying to hide his amusement. As soon as Jinho saw his brother, he started to complain, with a pouting face

“Hyung… Jonghyun hyung is cheating.”

“Ok. Ok. You won it” Jonghyun said standing up from the bed with a smiling face and walked towards Dongho. When he came near enough, he whispered “He got that mulish personality from you.” Dongho looked at his friend with an astonished and snappish face.

“What!! you were just like him” Jonghyun said and burst into laughter a moment later looking at the taller man’s expression. Dongho was his childhood friend, they had grown up together. They were together when they skipped the lesson for the first time, they were together when they had drunk their first soju, they were together when they fell in love, and they were together when they cried….

Dongho couldn’t fight his smirk back, too. He elbowed his friend’s ribcage and won a painful sigh.

“Time to go home, Jinho- yah” he said. Jinho raised his head and said with happiness in his eyes “Really?”

“Yes. Mom is waiting for us”

“Scary doctor uncle can’t find me in our home, right?”

“No, he can’t find you” Dongho said with a glimpse in his face. He clapped his small hands and Dongho started to take off the hospital clothes from Jinho while chatting with him about the meals his mother had prepared for them.

Meanwhile, Jonghyun was watching his childhood friend and the man he loved chatting with his brother. The man he had fallen in love a long time ago. The man he had dreamed of every night…

*

They sat around the table in the kitchen and started to savor all the dishes. Jinho was swinging his legs with excitement while his mother was heaping all plates with a happy smile on her face. Daniel and Jonghyun started to full their mouths humming in delight.

Dongho looked at his mom and collected his courage. He had to tell. He had to tell it sooner or later because he had wanted time from Minhyun until Jinho was discharged from the hospital and today was the day he had to tell his mother about the marriage.

“Mom! I want to tell you something.” Her curious stares directed from her plate to her son. Daniel without stopping to chew raised his head realizing the tension in Dongho’s voice. Dongho gulped and “I –I have a boyfriend and I want to marry him.” said with one breath. Jonghyun dropped the fork in his hand which caused a flapping sound after hitting the surface of the plate. He clenched his fist without realizing and hid them under the table. Something was ripping his heart. Every cell in his body could feel the pain spreading from his chest.

“What!!” Kang Minah said with a puzzled expression.

“I- I want to marry” Dongho repeated although he knew it wasn’t a real question. Jonghyun gasped for breath while Daniel scrambled to his feet pushing the chair he had sat on and said “Yah Dongho. Why didn’t you tell me you had a boyfriend?” Failing at the attempt of hiding disappointment and anger in his voice “I- I cou- I couldn’t find an opportunity to talk about it” he shuttered.

“Dongho, how did you meet? Who is he? How long have you been together?” his mother asked in one breath. “I….we… how long?...we have been together for almost 6 months” Dongho said cursing at himself why he didn’t think he would be attacked with the questions “How did you find time to meet? We are almost together 7/24_” This damn Sherlock Daniel!!!_ “You are creating time when you love” Jonghyun lowered his head looking at his clenched fists under the table. _No! No! This can’t be true._

“Who is he?” his mother asked with a careful tone. Dongho could feel his mother’s curiosity. “Hwang Minhyun.” Daniel repeated the name again silently and then with opened wide eyes he said

“You are not talking about the heir of Hwangs, the son of Hwang Junwoo, are you? It is just coincidentally the same name.”

“No, I am talking about him, Hwang Minhyun; the son of Hwang Junwoo,” he turned his face to his mom and kept “He wants to meet with you, mom” Jinho not understanding what the adults were talking about kept eating his meal and tried to clean the food stains on his small t-shirt.

“Ok. Your word is the most crucial for me. If you love him… Why don’t you invite him to dinner tomorrow?” Dongho sighed with relief “OK.” Jonghyun jumped on his feet attracting all attention on himself “Thanks for the meal. Good evenings” he bowed and made his way towards the door without looking at Dongho’s face. The last thing he had heard Dongho’s calling out for him before he slapped the door.

“Jonghyun-ah!!”

\----------------------

“His father died two years ago. He has one little brother named Kang Jinho and is living with his mother and brother. He quitted the university after his father’s death. He has been working in a small café for a year and a half. He is hardworking, clever and has a good personality. He is being liked too much. I searched everywhere that I can but I couldn’t find anyone who thinks badly about him. His friends, teachers, even his neighbors… Mr. Hwang.”

Mr. Hwang stood up from the armchair located in front of the table tidying up his clothes and walked towards the man holding the yellow folder in his hands.

“Such a boy…. with my son. Interesting” he said smiling satisfied with the information he got and stretched his hand to take the folder.

*

He looked at his wife sitting across the long table which was located in the big hall and had too much food on it for two. He took the napkin after putting aside the fork and knife and cleaned the sides of his mouth.

“I have talked with Minki. He was very angry with me because he had run out of money”

“He could work and earn his own money. Everybody abroad lives like that” She answered back dismissively.

“Don’t you miss him? Seo-Eun-ah”

“He is my son Junwoo, of course, I miss him but he doesn’t miss us, does he?” She said meaningfully.

“I wish he could be here” Mr. Hwang sighed and kept “Anyway, in fact, I would tell you something else”

“I have got some information about that boy”

“Which boy?” She asked while she was cutting the roasted meat without looking at her husband.

“The boy your son loves. Dongho” she raised her head at last.

“What is your aim?” She asked with a serious tone leaving the fork and knife from her hands onto the plate and raising her chin up.

“I investigated him. Seo-Eun ahh. He is quite and an honest man”

“So??” she was waiting for her husband to keep. A few tense seconds passed between them.

“So I think he is already way out of Minhyun’s league. He is much better than our son”

“I can’t let someone like him marry my son, Junwoo. Don’t you listen to me? How will we explain that? Pictures in newspapers, articles on the net. -Son of Hwang Junwoo married with an ignoble man-” she started to yell. Mr. Hwang fought with himself to keep his expression steady. He closed his eyes while squeezing his temple with his forefinger and thump.

“Now, it is your turn to listen to me, Seo-Eun-ah. Hang on my every word. Don’t be judgemental about the people you don’t know. And whatever you think, we will go for dinner to meet his mother in the soonest time to decide the marriage date. I don’t know whether you would prefer to buy yourself a new dress or go upstairs to cry nonstop. I don’t care actually. I don’t want my son to be unhappy and curse at his parents for his unhappiness. And now I am going to let Minhyun know that he can marry Dongho.” He stood up from the long table leaving a fuming wife behind.

Minhyun breathed out for the last time and knocked at the door. Dongho had called him yesterday night and told him his mother wanted to invite him to the dinner. The door was opened and he saw Dongho’s broad structure. “Welcome. Minhyun-ah” he said with a warm smile. Minhyun’s mind felt blank as soon as he saw that man’s smile that could be replaced with the sun. He shook his head with the hope of getting rid of his ridiculous thoughts and gulped. Then it hit him. _He is playing the love game. It is just a game._ He couldn’t understand the reason of the sadness he felt in his chest but Minhyun tried to smile back.

“Hyuuung” Minhyun saw a child looking at him with sparkling eyes between Dongho’s legs. He looked up towards Minhyun with an adorable face. _Miniature Dongho_ he thought.

“Who is he? Hyung” he asked without stopping to look at Minhyun curiously.

“I am Minhyun. You?” Minhyun said kneeling down to see Miniature Dongho’s face more clearly.

“I am Kang Jinho”

“Nice to meet you Jinho-yah.” Minhyun said smiling and stretching his hand to little Dongho to shake hands. Jinho looked up to his brother and Dongho nodded. Jinho shook hands with Minhyun. Dongho with a genuine smile said to him

“Come in” Minhyun stepped forward and saw Dongho’s mother walking towards him with a warm and smiling face. He was more surprised the moment she pulled him into a hug.

“Welcome, Minhyun-ah.”

“Th-thank you” Minhyun shuttered. Dongho pressing his lips together tried not to laugh at Minhyun’s puzzled face.

\-------

After an hour and a half, they were drinking their coffees in the sitting room. Jinho was sleeping in Dongho’s lap who was petting his little brother’s hair. Minhyun’s glares were slipping to the man every time he moved his hand to pet Jinho’s hair. Minhyun was fascinated by the look in Dongho’s eyes when he was looking at his brother. _He will be a great dad_ Minhyun thought without leaving his stares on them.

“Dongho-yah how about putting Jinho into the bed?” he looked at his mother who was drying her hands with a puzzled face and turned his gaze to Minhyun. He was afraid of leaving Minhyun alone with his mother.

“Mom!!”

“Dongho, please. I know you don’t want to leave him alone with me but I want to have a word with Minhyun” she said smiling. That was the thing Dongho was scared the most. He carefully stood up capturing Jinho into his arms who threw his hands around Dongho with a grumbling noise and he started to walk towards the stairs. Mrs. Kang looked at her two sons affectionately. When Dongho got out of their sight, she turned her gaze back to Minhyun who gulped with the thought of what he would hear.

“Look Minhyun. Dongho is my precious. He looks tough but actually, he has a really soft heart. He is clever but pure. He believes in people too easily and I saw some pictures of you in the newspapers today. Unfortunately, I can’t say I really appreciated them….. I just want to say: if you will break his heart in the future, give up now. Because I don't really care about who or whose son you are. He wants to marry you and I can’t stop him because it is not something that I can decide. So think it well, please” at that exact moment they heard Dongho’s quick footsteps echoing in the sitting room. Mrs. Kang cracked a smile. Minhyun stood up from the armchair and said with a soft voice after Dongho sat beside him.

“It is late. I had better go. Mrs. Kang. Nice to meet you and really thanks for everything” he bowed and walked towards the door.

“Nice to meet you, too Minhyun-ah” They walked with Minhyun to the door. Minhyun opened the door and turned his face to Dongho. Minah left them alone thinking they needed some privacy. Dongho closed the door behind them and they started to walk towards the Minhyun’s car. A few silent moments passed and Dongho was the one who broke the silence.

“I don’t know what she told to you but don’t worry about her”

“No, it is not a problem”

“I guess this got out of our hands. We started a strange game. If I knew this would be so difficult…”

“It is not easy for me, either but….”

“But there is no turning back now, right?” Dongho completed the sentence Minhyun couldn’t. “I guess so…. In fact, it is just 6 months”

“Yeah, just 6 months. It will fly.” Dongho said as if trying to convince himself.

“Anyway let’s turn back to the main problem”

“Yeah, dinner with parents. We have to get it over safely. A small mistake can destroy everything” Minhyun said sighing in anxiety.

“Yes, how about your parents?”

“Well. My dad is really willing to take you as my husband but my mom is having difficulty in accepting it.” Minhyun smiled recalling the moment his father had entered his room and told him he could marry Dongho. He looked at the shorter man’s eyes and said in a serious tone.

“Dongho! I want a promise from you about there will not be any problem tomorrow evening or everything will be ruined”

“Don’t worry. I will try my best” they looked at each other’s eyes for just a moment and Dongho said

“Good night, then”

“Good night. See you tomorrow” Minhyun got into his car and pressed the gas while Dongho was going back home.

\-------------------------------

Dongho breathed out nervously when he saw the black and fancy car stopping in front of the house. Pale street lamps were trying hard to lighten the house. He, his mother and Daniel were waiting for their guests getting off the car in front of the main door. When they approached enough,

“Welcome” his mother said lightly bowing to her guests. Hwang Seo Eun was staring around with judging eyes.

“Here, come in” his mother gestured with a smiling face. They all went into the sitting room. Dongho felt Minhyun’s mother sizing him up which made him extremely self-aware and move unsettlingly. After half an hour of small talk, Mrs. Kang invited Mr. and Mrs. Hwang to the table for the dinner. She took the plate in front of Mr. Hwang and put the meal. Then she stretched her hand to take the plate in front of Mrs. Hwang but was stopped with a motion

“Thank you. But I won’t eat anything” after she stopped Mrs. Kang, she pulled a napkin from her own bag and started to wipe the forks and knives in front of her husband ignoring his irritated stares. Dongho gave Minhyun a puzzled and disappointed look. He saw the irritation in his mother’s face. Meanwhile, Minhyun was biting his inner cheeks from frustration. His mother had gone too far.

Hwang Junwoo cleared his throat and trying to suppress the tension in the air pointed out Daniel and asked “This young man??” Dongho was the one who responded to this question. “He is my cousin on my father’s side.” Daniel slightly bowed. Mr. Hwang smiled at Dongho warmly while Kang Minah sat on the chair after serving the food.

“Mrs. Kang! Thanks for everything. You know the reason for our visit. The young ones love each other and want to marry. If you ………” his sentence was cut off with a loud phone ring. Mrs. Hwang pulled out her phone from the bag and answered it.

“How are you, dear?...... What are you doing there? Me? I am out now. It has been a long time, right?” Minhyun whispered “Mom” across the table. She ignored her son. Mr. Hwang turned his angry glares at his wife and cleared his throat again. The tension in the air was rising by the time.

“Anyway, I have to hang up now. I will call you later, honey.” she put the phone back. Mr. Hwang smiled and turned his face to Mr. Kang again. “If you approve of this marriage, we want to decide on the marriage date at your convenience.”

Mrs. Kang shot a glare at her son and forced a smile. “I have talked to my son. He loves Minhyun and anytime…” her sentence was cut off by Mrs. Hwang “This is a really strange conversation. As if you won’t approve” she said raising her chin up and looking at Mrs. Kang arrogantly.

“Seo Eun ah” Mr. Hwang said with a warning voice.

Dongho saw his mother clenched her teeth and she said “I don’t approve”

Minhyun looked at puzzled Dongho. “What!” Mrs. Kang stood up from the table with haste and said: “You have troubled yourself to come here but I don’t approve of this marriage.” Looking at Daniel she kept

“Daniel, show the way our guests out” Minhyun was staring at Dongho’s eyes with a horrified face.

“Mom!!!!!” Dongho made everyone in the room look at him.

“Our guests are not going anywhere. I will marry Minhyun whatever happens” he said gulping. He could see the disappointment and anger in his mother’s eyes. She looked at her son's eyes clenching her jaw.

“Wish you happiness then” she stepped back scraping her chair against the floor and started to walk towards the stairs in a hurried pace leaving Dongho behind.


	5. I will not

Dongho looked at the dim light leaking from the doorsill which meant his mother was still awake. He breathed out with the hope of screwing up his courage. Without giving any second thought, he knocked at the door and opened it not waiting for any response. Kang Minah was embroidering at the armchair located beside the lampshade. He walked towards his mother and kneeled down beside the armchair stretching his hand to hold his mother’s hands. When Minah felt the touch, she raised her head and looked at her son with a bitter smile.

“Mom!...” Dongho whispered but she cut him off pointing out the embroidery “I could finish it in a day before. But now I can’t. It takes at least 2 weeks to finish one. I am getting older, Dongho.” she cupped Dongho’s face affectionately looking into his eyes and kept “I haven’t prostrated myself before anyone. But everyone will prostrate before time. There is nothing I can do about that. But I will try to hold my head up high until my last day.” Dongho opened his mouth but she stopped him with her hand “It is up to you to marry him. But don’t wait for my approval and calling him as my son-in-law.” She stood up leaving the embroidery frame onto the armchair and went out from the room leaving Dongho with soon-to-be-spilled-tears

*

He closed the door of his room and went down the stairs. “Mom, I am leaving” he said in a loud voice enough to make his mother hear him. Jinho was still sleeping and the sun was leaking into the house from every hole it could find and making to sleep hard.

“Ok. Take care!”

He cracked a smile with the thought of his mother had already forgiven him. Just for 6 months, he repeated to himself and then he would tell everything to her kneeling down and wishing for her forgiveness. Breathing deeply he opened the door and went out shooting a glance at the blooming yellow, red, purple flowers his mother had planted into the small garden. And to the tall and old tree stretching out the sky for years. God knows how many times he had taken a nap under it, how many times he had fallen to the ground from it making his father take him to the hospital…

The moment he got out of the garden Dongho saw Jonghyun walking away.

“Jonghyun-ah” Dongho called out. He was sure Jonghyun heard his voice but his friend quickened his steps without turning his face to the source of the voice. Dongho was calling him once in an hour after the dinner but Jonghyun wasn’t responding to any of them. He even tried to send messages but they were stayed unresponded, too. This time Dongho wouldn’t let Jonghyun escape anywhere. He didn’t know the reason of Jonghyun’s motive for behaving like this but… he didn’t want his friend to escape from him. If there was something wrong, they should talk. They were friends for years after all. He jogged after him and captured Jonghyun from his shoulder and made him turn his face towards Dongho intemperately.

“You punk! I am worried. Why didn’t you pick up my calls?” he said with a high voice.

After Jonghyun recovered from the shock of the pull, he started to press his lips together hardly because he knew he would say something he shouldn’t have if he started to talk. He was just looking at Dongho’s eyes without uttering a word.

“You scumbag!” Dongho said not leaving to stare at his friend. Jonghyun felt an excruciating pain in his chest. For years, he had been growing love inside him for this man. It was stupid of him not to confess, not to exclaim his love to this thickhead man in front of him until now. Dongho sighed and cleared his throat with the hope of calming down and said

“Anyway….” he realized Jonghyun’s silence and

“You are coming, right? To the wedding?” he asked with the aim of breaking first his friend’s silence and then the ice between them.

“No, I am not” Jonghyun yanked his shoulder off Dongho’s grip. Dongho was puzzled but managed to say;

“Yah Kim Jonghyun! Your friend is marrying. You have to come”

“I won’t” Dongho stepped back with the Jonghyun’s shouting. It was the first time Jonghyun spoke with him this way. He was the friendliest person he had known. Jonghyun never talked in a loud tone with anyone, he was always optimistic even in the worst situations. He was cute and had a good personality made everyone he had met love him in seconds.

Dongho said with a worried voice “Jonghyun-ah, what is the problem? Is there something wrong?”

“Yes, there is something wrong. Do you want to hear it? Do you want to learn what the problem is?” Jonghyun retorted back using high voice again.

It was enough. Dongho’s patience ran out and he started to shout out of his lungs “Yes, I am really wondering why my friend isn’t answering my calls or not responding to my messages. Let alone running away from dinner suddenly. Let alone trying to escape when every time he saw me. Let alone not giving any logical reason for not attending my wedding. You shit!!.”

“I am fucking in love with you. And I don’t want to see you marry someone else. Is it logical enough?” Jonghyun shouted back with a trembling voice and eyes brimmed with tears.

Dongho rooted on the spot trying to make sense of what he heard and shuttered “Wh-what!!”

“I am….. in …love…. with you, Kang Dongho. It is too late, I know. It is my fault not to tell you up to now. But… but I didn’t know you had an interest in wealthy snobs” Jonghyun said pressing every word to make Dongho understand each of them and letting his tears fall down.

As soon as Dongho felt his legs again, he started to walk away breathing heavily with the shock of what he heard. “I love you” was the last thing he had heard before speeding up his steps and leaving Jonghyun behind crying in the middle of the road.

He snapped out of his thoughts when the glass in his hand slipped and shattered into pieces making everyone in the café look at him. “I am sorry” he mouthed and bowed. Daniel went out from the counter leaving the espresso on the stand and walked towards his friend

“Dongho, are you OK?”

“Yes. I am” He answered sighing. Daniel looked around and called out Guanlin.

“Guanlin, can you clean here?” the tall boy nodded and Daniel captured Dongho from his left arm dragging the broader man into the kitchen. After he closed the door behind them, he said “You aren’t OK. Dongho. What is wrong?”

“I am OK. There is nothing wrong. Daniel” Dongho said trying to understand what Daniel meant

“Have you started to hide some things from me?” Daniel asked crossing his arms over his chest.

“What are you talking about, Niel?” Dongho said pretending dismissive. Daniel sighed and _it will not be easy_ he thought

“Ok. I will try it to make sense. Jinho had an accident. You didn’t tell me anything about what you had talked with the doctor that day. You said you had to do something and ran away somewhere coming back in the morning. And then the day Jinho got discharged from the hospital you said you had a boyfriend and wanted to marry him.”

“Daniel!!! I am not getting what you mean”

“Let me finish it, Dongho! And you are doing something you haven’t done even once until now. You are standing up to your mother. I watched you all night. I couldn’t see any little sign that shows you are in love with him. What is happening, Dongho?”

“Where the hell did you get this idea from? I love him” Dongho asked trying to hide the panic rising in his chest.

“I am your friend. I know you. So, don’t try to fool me Dongho. The only thing I saw yesterday night was anxiety in your eyes. As if you made a mistake and don’t want anybody to know it. Is it right?” Daniel expecting Dongho to answer honestly

“I am telling you for the last time, Daniel, I love Minhyun. I really don't get I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” Dongho said with an angry voice and turned to walk away hoping Daniel would bring up the subject never again, but…

“Dongho!!!”

“Daniel! Stop!!” Dongho retorted back and went out of the kitchen he was dragged by his friend.

*

Mr. Hwang looked at his reflection on the mirror and fixed his tie. He went down the stairs and walked out towards to the breakfast table set on the poolside. Mrs. Hwang was already sipping her tea reading a fashion- magazine. He pulled the chair and sat down saying

“Good morning”

“Good morning” she said turning the page without looking at her husband. After a few minutes of the silence, Mr. Hwang said

“I informed public relations consultants. They have started preparations for the wedding. I am just asking. Do you have any idea about where we should hold the ceremony?” he asked his wife while filling his mouth with the bacon.

“I can’t make all Korea laugh at me holding the ceremony somewhere out.” She retorted back with a sullen expression. “Just hold it here”

“In the house?”

“Yes, in the house. Fewer guest, less gossip” she said allusively opening her eyes wide and pressing her lips together.

“Let it be so then. Do you have something to say about the invitation cards?”

“No! Do how you know”

“Alright, suit yourself” he stood up from the table taking his jacket hanging down from the chair and made his way towards the chauffeur.

*

Dongho tumbled onto the bed. This was a tiring day both physically and mentally. His thoughts were lingering on his mother, Daniel, and Jonghyun over and over causing an unbearable headache. He covered his eyes with his arm attempting to obstruct the yellow and dim light leaking from the lampshade. And then he heard the creaking sound of the door and small steps. Jinho sneaked over his brother.

“How was your day?” Dongho asked without opening his eyes and started to pat Jinho’s hair with his free hand

“Fine, I played football with my friends and my mom made a cake for us. There were grapes in it. I will want a cake with watermelon next time.” Jinho said with excitement. Dongho smiled and raised his arm from his eyes to look at his brother. “I don’t think she can make a cake with a watermelon, Jinho-yah” Jinho opened his eyes wide lifting his head.

“Why? If it can be with grapes, then it can be with watermelon, too”

“Hmmm, I don’t know but I didn’t see a cake with watermelon anywhere.” Dongho said scratching his head and thinking the possibility of the cake with watermelon.

Jinho hummed. After a few moments of silence, he called out his brother again with his sleepy voice

“Hyung… my friends say you will marry”

“Yes, I will” Dongho said sighing

“Really? But they say when you marry, you will not live with us anymore” Dongho froze and stopped patting his brother’s strands. Yes, he would probably move to Hwang's estate because there was no way Minhyun to live here. He heaved and said “Yes, I will not. But….But you can come to visit me whenever you want, I can come here, too” Jinho hummed and Dongho started to pat his brother’s hair feeling his soft locks under his hand again. After a few minutes, he saw Jinho’s sleeping face tempting to right and his parted lips in a cute way making him crack a smile. He was feeling his eyelids were getting heavier and heavier, too. While his conscience was about to slide into the sleep, he heard a car horn making him open his eyes. Dongho raised Jinho’s head carefully from his chest and replaced a pillow under his brother’s head after standing up from the bed carefully. He stepped forward the window and saw Minhyun getting off the car. He went down from the stairs to go out. His mother was washing the dishes. “Mom. I am going out for a few minutes. It is Minhyun” He said gulping. “Ok.” his mother nodded and dried her hands onto the towel hanging down from her kitchen apron. He quickened his steps towards the door and opened it. Minhyun was waiting for him leaning on the front of the car. Dongho closed the door behind him and when he approached enough, he opened his mouth to ask Minhyun why he came. But as if Minhyun knew Dongho’s question, he said “I came here to give these” stretching the invitation cards to Dongho who looked into the taller man’s eyes and reached out the cards.

“So, we are really doing this” Dongho whispered without leaving his glares on the cards. “Yes.” Minhyun said with a decisive and louder voice making Dongho raise his head and looked into Minhyun’s eyes again.

“Good night.” Minhyun said with haste and got into his car not waiting for Dongho’s response. He pressed the gas breathing out to calm his heartbeat. He didn’t know the reason why his heart was beating when he glared into this man’s eyes but he knew he had to get rid of it.

-

Dongho got into the house and sat on the armchair putting the cards on the coffee table in front of the television. He breathed out and _just for 6 months _he thought. _Just for 6 months._

“Dongho!” he startled from his thoughts when he heard his mother calling his name.

“Yes” he turned his face to his mother who was looking at the invitation cards on the table.

“Minhyun brought these?” she walked towards the table and took one of them in her hand.

“Yes.” His mother smiled and said leaving the card on the table “I have to show you something. Come with me.” His glares slid to the invitation cards again while standing up from the armchair. He sighed and went after his mother. They went upstairs and stopped in front of the room Dongho hadn’t entered for years; his dad’s workroom. He had tried to sneak into it many times but he had ended up being caught by his father every time he attempted. After his father’s death, Dongho didn’t even think about looking into the room. “Mom!!! I don- I don’t want..” he turned his face to his mother gulping and shaking his head but his mother cut him off.

“This is the last present from your dad, Dongho” she unlocked the door with a key and opened it with a creaking sound. As soon as the door was opened, Dongho smelled the wood and dust but couldn’t see anything until his mother switched on the lights. The first thing he had realized was his father’s pieces of equipment on a stand. Equipment for carvings; a special knife, a chisel, a gouge and then he saw a lot of furniture lining along the wall.

“After he came from the workshop, he had always come here to design furniture even if he had been very exhausted…… He had always dreamed of the day you would marry and place these in your house” Dongho stepped forward the first furniture; a wardrobe and touched its surface and all carvings. These still smelled like wood and his father who must have spent too much time to create these beautiful carvings. He wanted to cry; he wanted to shout; he wanted to exclaim but he couldn’t.

“These are yours, Dongho. Tomorrow I will send them to your new house” she wiped a single tear flowing down from her cheek and left the room leaving Dongho behind. His eyes caught one pair of wood duck carvings facing each other standing on the shelf. He rubbed his chest with the hope of stopping the thing trying to pull his heart out. His father had been in this room for months. For him. For his marriage. For his _fake_ marriage.

*

Dongho looked at himself in the mirror. His hair neatly combed to the right, freshly shaved face, his suit chosen among the thousands … The day of the wedding came and he should accept that he was totally stranger to the chic world of chaebols... He smiled bitterly and thought _you can’t get always what you want_. He heaved closing his eyes across the mirror. His mind was full with his mother’s disappointed gaze, the smell of the wood, Daniel’s speaking and Jonghyun’s confession. Everything was swimming before his closed eyes. Is he doing the right thing?

No, it is not right. Deceiving people, lying to the parents, marrying a man you didn’t know…. His thoughts were divided with the knock at the door.

“Dongho??” he heard Minhyun’s voice. “Yes”

“We have to go. The guests are waiting for us” Dongho breathed out and opened the bathroom’s door meeting Minhyun in a groom’s suit. He was incredibly handsome with his tall structure made him fit into the suit very well. His flawless and pale skin shining in the black suit. His long and white neck that would make the most beautiful creature in the universe envy him. And his Adam’s apple popping up and down when he gulped. _Maybe if we met in another situation_…

Meanwhile, Minhyun’s heart started to beat in a hurried pace as soon as he laid his eyes on Dongho. He fought with his urge to size that man up but failed. Broad shoulders stretching the upper part of the jacket, waist wrapped tightly by the buttoned jacket, thick thighs and the trousers surrounding them flawlessly and then his face. His parted hair not falling onto his thick brows making his face look brighter, his light brown eyes harmonizing perfectly with his pale but lightly-tanned skin, and his full lips… Minhyun couldn’t keep his eyes off Dongho’s lips.

He closed his eyes one moment and said clearing his throat “Are you ready?”

“No. You?”

“No….let’s go then.” Dongho nodded and they started to go down the stairs. When they reached the main door, Minhyun looked at Dongho eyes and stretched his hand. Dongho understood what Minhyun meant and they interlocked their hands before going out into the crowd. Like partners in crime trying to get strength from each other’s existence.

The tables covered in silky white sheets were lining alongside the huge pool. Each table had splendent candelabras. There were huge flower bouquets lined on the clear blue water. Candles were placed poolside creating a midnight-summer-night ambiance. White tables, trees, and clear blue pool were harmonizing with each other magnificently. The guests sitting on the tables and waiters offering the food and liquor on their trays. Everybody started to clap when they appeared on the door. Dongho looked around and said without looking at Minhyun “This is too much for a fake marriage.” Minhyun leaned towards Dongho’s ear and whispered with a nervous smile on his face “Dongho, I guess you sometimes forget it. This is fake just for us. To them, it is real. So try to smile a little not to make people think this is a funeral.”

“Ok. Boss.” Minhyun rolled his eyes while Dongho was looking around to see Daniel but he couldn’t.

*

Seongwoo saw Minhyun and Dongho went out from the estate holding each other’s hands. And then Minhyun whispered something into Dongho’s ear with a smiling face. Seongwoo cracked a smile at the scene and thought_ they would really suit well if it was real_. He snapped out of his thoughts with a smooth touch on his shoulder and turned his body towards it. He saw Hae –Won in a low-cut dress making her look sexier. She had a tall and slim structure beside a flawless and white pale skin. She was a woman that everyone could crave for. He wrapped his arm around her slim waist and she whispered occupying Seongwoo’s space almost making her lips brush at Seongwoo’s lips.

“It has been a long time. Right? Do you want to drink something to relax at my place or your place after the wedding?” she drew an invisible line over Seongwoo’s arm with her slim finger and grabbed it with her hand. Seongwoo shivered from the touch making him close his eyes. When he reopened his eyes, the first thing he saw a man passing by with his friends. A man smiling with his cute bunny teeth. A man who was a café worker. A man Seongwoo had dreamed every night for a week. He froze again like the first time he had seen this man smiling at him in a coffee shop. He wouldn’t let him escape anywhere this time. He wouldn’t let this man who made Seongwoo’s heartbeat rise crazily run away like the last time.

Seongwoo answered back yanking her hand from his arm and unwrapping his left arm around her waist “I guess I found my Cinderella. I am sorry but no interest in drinking something with you” he made his way towards the man he had seen in this blessed café leaving a pouting woman behind.

*

Time was flying. Dongho’s head started to ache from the music and drinks. He knew his alcohol tolerance was low. But he wanted to drink maybe with the hope of getting rid of the thoughts in his mind. His mother, Daniel, Jinho, Jisung, Sungwoon, his friends from the neighborhood and university had come and sat on their respected places.

He breathed out turning his face to Minhyun and said looking into his eyes “Minhyun, I want to tell you something. I think I will not….” He was cut off with Mr. Hwang’s thick voice

“Dongho!! Minhyun!! The ceremony is starting. Hurry up!” They both looked at the owner of the voice. Minhyun stretched his hand to Dongho and they started to walk towards the registrar. When they reached their supposed places, the registrar cleared his throat making everybody bury in silence. Dongho could feel every stare at him causing his hands to sweat excessively. He couldn’t hear anything as his ears were drumming until the old registrar started to say

“Do you, Hwang Minhyun, take Kang Dongho to be your lawful wedded husband, to love, to honor, and to cherish?"

“Yes, I do” Minhyun said with one breath.

“Do you, Kang Dongho, take Hwang Minhyun to be your lawful wedded husband, to love, to honor, and to cherish?"

Dongho caught his mother’s eyes. Everything was flowing into his brain. His mother’s disappointed glares at him, his father’s room, Daniel’s attempt to speak; Jonghyun’s crying in the middle of the road… everything. It was wrong to deceive people. It was wrong to lie. What would happen worst if he said no?

Then his glares slid the small creature in front of Daniel, his little brother. The recall of crashing sound, red liquid on the road, the pain he felt on his chest, his mother’s tears, the doctor’s face when he had gone out the surgery, the white door, red lights on the screen in front of the operation room…..

He looked at Minhyun who was waiting for Dongho’s answer with begging eyes and breathed out.

“Yes, I do” he said. Whatever happens, he wouldn’t regret accepting this game as long as he knew it saved his brother.


	6. I am tired

Jonghyun’s glares slid onto the card in his hand again. The card announcing Dongho was getting married… The card announcing he wouldn’t have any chance with the man he loved anymore… The card announcing he had to give up on his love... He smiled bitterly without leaving his gaze on this damn card.

He heaved and looked at the huge entrance of the Hwangs estate reflecting on his decision but ready to enter in his black and chic suit. What was he doing here? What should he do? Should he go in or not? Was he a masochist? He was repeating these questions in his mind over and over but his legs stepped towards the door abruptly and he found himself walking among elegant and chic ladies and polite gentlemen holding their hands kindly. He handed the card Daniel had compacted into his hand last night to the guards waiting at the door. The guards showed the way and one of them said

“Here you are, sir.”

He started to walk on the paving stones cobbled between the lines of the huge trees and saw the crowd drinking liquor and snorting at white tables, talking with each other, dancing accompanied by the outstanding classical music masterpieces at the poolside. His limbs suddenly settled on his spot stopping moving as they weren’t listening to his brain commands anymore. He couldn’t make his way any further as he didn’t want to witness something he shouldn’t have but his eyes were searching for Dongho unintentionally. When they spotted on the man he loved, the pain he had been fighting for 6 days flickered again. An excruciating pain spreading from his chest to every cell in his blood.

Dongho was extremely magnificent in his groom’s suit. His hair, face, broad shoulders, tall structure… And then Jonghyun’s glares slid down…. down onto the hand holding Dongho’s hand tightly. Hwang Minhyun’s hand… Hwang Minhyun’s hand…_I could be the one holding it right now_ _if I could manage to be brave earlier_ he thought and this thought made his eyes brim with tears. He couldn’t stop gazing hypnotized at their intertwined hands. He was feeling like his all bones crashed and excoriated. He made a mistake coming here. He shouldn’t have. Absolutely he shouldn’t. But his limbs weren’t responding to his desire to run away, either. He was glued to the spot watching the man he loved for a long time. Dongho took a glass from the tray of a waiter passing by and drank the whole glass with one shot. But Jonghyun knew Dongho didn’t like drinking at all. Even in the small clubs, he would prefer soda or coke. He remembered a day he begged Dongho to drink just one sip at one of the home parties with their friends.

When he started to feel his legs again, Jonghyun stepped back staggering and disappeared between the trees. He leaned on a tree and breathed out to get rid of the wrath clenching his heart. Suddenly he found out the reason why he came here. He should see with his own eyes the man he loved for years got married to someone else or he wouldn’t believe it at all. His childhood friend, his hero, his dependable man …He heard the registrar clearing his throat after the music stopped.

_“Dear guests, we have been invited here today to share with Hwang Minhyun and Kang Dongho a very important moment in their lives. They have decided to live their lives together as husband and husband."_

“Do you, Hwang Minhyun, take Kang Dongho to be your lawful wedded husband, to love, to honor, and to cherish?" Jonghyun’s heart started to be crushed under a massive burden. Breathing was really hard.

“Yes, I do” he heard Minhyun saying and closed his eyes waiting for Dongho’s. He was feeling like he was trying to struggle in a swamp but he was getting in deeper and deeper at the end of the day.

“Do you, Kang Dongho, take Hwang Minhyun to be your lawful wedded husband, to love, to honor, and to cherish?" Every word was pressing his soul. He waited for Dongho’s answer but it didn’t come. There was silence. He could feel the pressure in the air. Silence and then silence again. Dongho wasn’t saying -Yes-. _Maybe_ Jonghyun thought and then he heard

“Yes, I do” he couldn’t feel his legs anymore making him kneel down wrapping his hands around and started to sob heavily but his sobs mixed with the loud applause and stayed unheard.

“Why are you crying?” He heard someone asking with a soft and affectionate voice. Jonghyun raised his head and looked at the man who kneeled down next to Jonghyun leaving the suitcase on the pavement and leaning on the tree.

“I was just 17 when I was sent abroad by force because I was in love with a man I shouldn’t. I don’t even remember his face now.” The man smiled bitterly meanwhile Jonghyun was struggling with his non-stop tears without looking at the stranger.

“I couldn’t return home for 7 years as my parents bought every man in this country. I was sent back from the airport crying, shouting, struggling so many times that I forgot the number.” Jonghyun could feel the pain leaking from the man.

“And now my brother is getting married……but I learned it from a fucking website. Nevertheless, I am not crying. I will fight until the end. You have to fight with whatever made you cry like that, too. Believe me, life is not as hard as we have thought. Every bad has its worse”

Jonghyun stood up from the ground and looked at the young man still sitting on the ground. He was beautiful with pale and smooth skin shining under the lamps, heart-shaped lips, and chocolate- brown hair. The stranger scrambled to his feet shaking the dust with his hands and looked at Jonghyun’s eyes stretching his hand to shake.

“I am Minki; the second son of Hwangs. You?”

Jonghyun smiled contrasting with his teary and swollen eyes and answered shaking hands with Minki

“I am Kim Jonghyun; a simple man in love with the man your brother officially got married now.” He turned his back to leave this damn estate and heard Minki dragging the suitcase on the paving stones causing a rattling noise.

*

Minhyun sighed with relief when he heard Dongho’s "Yes" and whispered ‘Thank you’ while Dongho was making him wear the wedding ring. He looked at the silver round thing surrounding his finger. He had just escaped from an engagement ring a week ago and now he was wearing a marriage ring. _What a fucking contradiction _he thought smiling. They turned their face to the officiant and

“By the power of your love and commitment, and the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and husband!............. You may kiss each other” Dongho raised his head to look at Minhyun’s eyes with a puzzled face and wide eyes. He hadn’t thought the kiss even once. _Damn it. Of course, the marriage kiss. _Minhyun stared back at Dongho’s eyes. But he was feeling every stare like arrows on them. Smiling nervously Minhyun stepped towards Dongho with haste and whispered into his ear.

“Dongho, it is just a kiss. It will not last long and please don’t look at me like you want to murder me” Dongho shot a glance at the crowd briefly. Everyone was waiting for their kiss. _Minhyun is right. It will not last long. Just a small kiss. I should. I can. I promised him. This is real for them. For my mom. For Daniel. _Dongho breathed out and stepped in Minhyun’s space with confidence erasing the nervous and puzzled look on his face suddenly. The shorter man smiled at the taller and looked into Minhyun’s dark brown eyes. The latter’s heart started to beat almost unsettlingly making him gasp for the breath. He wasn’t expecting that Dongho would be the one who initiated it. While he was struggling with his heart beating out of his chest, he felt Dongho’s big hands sneaking around his neck extremely-slow but extremely-delicate and sensitive. Minhyun could feel his hairs stood on the end with that simple touch. He couldn’t remember any time he felt like that. Maybe he had kissed hundreds of women and men but this feeling was extremely new to him. Everything about this man whose eyelids closed and who was approaching to Minhyun’s face by every slow split second with his lightly parted lips was extreme. Minhyun felt a strong urge to crush their mouths hardly and devour this man’s lips until both of them begged for the breath but his body, his limbs, his heart, his brain didn’t let him. _It is just a kiss_ he thought. _Just a simple kiss._ He closed his eyes, too with the hope of calming down a little bit. He could feel Dongho’s hot breath licking his skin sensitively onto his face and he felt the brush of Dongho’s lips onto his upper lip slightly. Minhyun was really trying hard to control his desire to feel more and deepen it. He gulped and parted his lips unintentionally. Minhyun couldn’t control his limbs and he wrapped his arms around Dongho’s shoulders yanking himself closer to his official husband. At that exact moment, they heard someone shouting towards them. Minhyun untangled his arms from Dongho’s shoulders opening his eyes out of breath. _Why was he out of breath?_ _It wasn’t even a kiss. God damn it._

Everyone’s attention slid from the couple to the man shouting out of his lungs across the pool. “HEY!!!!!!!!” Dongho stepped back immediately taking advantage of the lack of the attention on them and the stranger dived into the pool causing a slashing noise and making some tea lights die from the overflowing water from the pool. He swam across the pool and stopped in front of the side Mr. and Mrs. Hwang standing at.

“Have you started without me?” he pulled himself out of the pool with clothes leaking water. Minhyun looked at the stranger and saw he was not anyone else but his brother.

“Minki” Minhyun said with a happy smile on his face and ran towards his little brother and pulled him into the hug not caring being soaked by Minki’s freshly-wet and cold clothes. Minki hugged his older brother tightly, too. They had missed each other too much to handle.

“Mom! Won’t you say welcome to your son?” Minki said with a meaningful voice after Minhyun released him from the hug. Mr. Hwang made his way towards his son and hugged him warmly. Minhyun gestured Dongho to come closer and Dongho made his way towards them. The taller man wrapped his arm around Dongho’s waist and said

“Minki, this is Dongho, my husband.” 

“Dongho, this is Minki, my little brother” Minhyun ruffled Minki’s hair and won a slap from his brother.

“Don’t..” Minki grumbled with a pouting face and trying to fix his strands. He stretched his hand to shake with Dongho and said

“So, you are the man who convinced my brother to get married.”Dongho blushed meanwhile Minki turned his face to his brother and kept “Minhyun! He is really handsome. Congratulations.” causing Dongho’s blush getting tenser. Minki leaned towards Minhyun and whispered, “I want to learn the details about how you convinced this man to marry you.” He turned his smiling face to Dongho and said hesitated

“And….. I saw a man named Kim Jonghyun in the garden just a moment ago. He didn’t seem well to me. I guess he was your friend.”

Dongho gasped for breath. The little smile on his face disappeared when he heard the name and that didn’t escape from Minhyun’s notice. He looked at Dongho’s sad expression. _There is something wrong. There is something wrong about the name Jonghyun making Dongho uncomfortable._

*

Seongwoo’s glares had been lingering on the guy named Daniel and the child clinging to him all night. _He is too young to have a child_ Seongwoo thought again trying to convince himself and _he doesn’t have a ring_…. _What if he forgot to wear it?_ Seongwoo huffed drinking the liquor he captured from one of the trays passing by.

The moment he had collected his courage to approach this magnificent and handsome man in a chic suit an hour ago, he had seen the child not leaving Daniel’s side even just for a moment. He was confused and frustrated. _Could he be married? …. Wait…. Maybe the child is his brother. Yes. Yes, he must be his brother… or cousin…or a friend’s child… _He stepped forward after leaving the glass on the table. He would at least introduce himself to this man today. The moment his legs started to move towards Daniel, everybody’s stare turned to a man shouting at the poolside. “HEY!!!!!” he turned his face to the man who drew everyone’s attention on him and saw who it was.

“Minki” he said in amazement gluing to his spot. Seongwoo couldn’t hold back his laughter after seeing Minki diving into the pool. His eyes slid onto Minhyun running towards his brother with a smiling face. When Minki had been sent abroad, Minhyun had cried for 2 days non-stop accusing himself of not being able to do anything. It had been fucking 7 years since the last time they had seen Minki. He trudged towards them and heard him saying to Dongho

“And….. I saw a man named Kim Jonghyun in the garden just a moment ago. He didn’t seem well to me. I guess he was your friend.” Seongwoo touched Minki’s shoulder making him turn and said

“Welcome to your home.” hugging the man tightly. “Thank you. Seongwoo” Minki said smiling and hugging the tall man back.

After half an hour, the music started again and Seongwoo approached the table and the man he was watching an opportunity to speak with.

“Good night. Can I sit here?” he said trying to hold onto the self-confidence decreasing more and more with every second he looked at Daniel’s face. The man cracked a gummy smile at Seongwoo and said “Good night. Of course. Here you are” with his deep and impressive voice. Seongwoo gulped and pulled the chair next to Daniel’s to sit down. He was watching Dongho and Minhyun in full attention. The pairs were dancing slowly at the space beside the pool. Daniel turned his face to the table and took the glass in front of him and drank a sip. Seongwoo cleared his throat and opened his mouth to say something but Daniel stood up from his chair causing a disturbing noise and walked towards the other side of the round table. Towards a girl… a beautiful girl... He stretched his hand and said “Could you give me the honor of dancing with you? Im Nayeon-shi” The girl smiled with a cute expression and accepted putting her small hand into Daniel’s big hand.

Seongwoo stood up from the table with haste and turned his back fuming. He would certainly think of the offer Hae Won had made again.

*

“Here you are sir.” the hotel staff said while opening the door. Dongho looked around. It was really unnecessarily exaggerated. Everywhere was filled with tea lights and flowers. The room had a glass wall causing the feel of the city underfoot. It had a huge and comfortable bathtub surrounded with flowers and candles inside the room. Fruits and high-quality wines were lined on the coffee table near the double-sized bed. “Wow! It is really too much for a fake marriage” Minhyun said cracking a nervous smile and looking around.

“It went well right. The ceremony” Minhyun said loosening the tie with his finger and rambling in the room.

“You don’t have to do it.” Minhyun turned his face to his _legal_ husband sitting on the bed and said “What??” with a confused face trying to understand what Dongho meant 

“You don’t have to speak with me when we don’t have to pretend as lovers” Dongho repeated looking at Minhyun who was standing in front of the bed on which there were many kinds of flowers. 

“You are really strange” he said loosening his tie completely and throwing it onto the bed 

Dongho frowned and asked “Why?” 

“I don’t know. It was really fun but you didn’t even smile once let alone speak to someone. You were silent all night.” the taller man said plopping to sit down on the bed next to Dongho without looking at his face. 

“What do you expect of me? Be wild with joy? Walk around guffawing?” Dongho retorted back. 

“Maybe... Anything except standing as still as a statue.” Minhyun answered back with teasing and dismissive tone. 

“Let me remind you. We are in this fucking hotel room because we both have to play this game.” The shorter man started to shout 

“Why don’t we have fun while playing it?” 

“Life is just made up of joy for you, right? Marriage is a serious thing. I can see that it is not so for you but it is the most crucial day in many people’s lives. Have you ever thought of that?” Minhyun opened his mouth to tell something but Dongho 

“And…. I wasted my mother’s dreams for something fake. And my dreams, too. So I think it is quite normal not to walk around laughing at every ridiculous sentence.” Minhyun stood up from the bed taking off the jacket and making his way towards the door 

“Seongwoo booked one more room. I am going there. Comfort yourself” but he stopped before opening the door, he asked the question that had been lingering in his mind for a few hours- He really shouldn’t have but couldn’t appease his curiosity. 

“I am really wondering…” Minhyun left the door handle and turned his face to Dongho 

“Is there something special between you and Jonghyun guy Minki mentioned?” 

Dongho looked at Minhyun’s face with a puzzled expression and he opened his mouth to say “No” but he instead said 

“It is not up to you” with a snappy tone. Minhyun bewildered by Dongho’s anger, he shuttered 

“Rig- right. It – it is not up to me.” He opened the door and went out towards the next room Seongwoo booked.

*

The car stopped at the familiar front garden. Dongho got off the car and looked at the estate he had been twice before – the first one when he ran away with Minhyun from the engagement, the second one when he got married to the same man. He would live here for 6 months. It was huge and magnificent. Dongho would probably miss his small, wood and lovely house. His bed, the table in the kitchen, armchair across the television, the tree in the garden and the table under it, flowers his mother planted… Everything… he would miss everything. 

They made their way towards the inside of the estate. Dongho exhaled and stepped forward. When they stepped into the house, Mr. Hwang jumped to his feet leaving the breakfast table and moved towards Dongho with open arms saying

“Welcome… Welcome to your new house Dongho” he pulled him into the warm hug. “Thank you” he bowed with a genuine smile. He wasn’t expecting this warm welcome as he was an unwanted son-in-law. Mrs. Hwang stood up from the table, too and hugged Minhyun with a smile. When she released Minhyun from her hug, she stretched her hand to Dongho to shake hands with a sullen and grimaced face. Mrs. Hwang said “Welcome” in a cold voice.

Dongho could feel the disapproval, disdain, and disgrace in her voice but he said “Thank you” and shook hands with Mrs. Hwang. He turned his face towards Mr. Hwang when he heard the old man calling out his name.

“Dongho!! We have a very significant meeting that I will need Minhyun in the company. So I want him to come with me. Do you mind..?” Dongho said in a hurry “It-it is not a problem for me.” Mr. Hwang smiled and said “See you in the evening, then” before making his way towards the main door. Minhyun turned his back to go after his dad but he stopped and turned his face towards the shorter man. He leaned gulping towards Dongho and kissed him on his cheeks wrapping his hand around his husband’s waist.

“See you” Minhyun said and made his way thinking it was just a cheek and trying to calm his heart down.

After Dongho heard the closing sound of the door, he turned his face to Mrs. Hwang who had already replaced her spot on the breakfast table.

“Your room is upstairs. The room across when you go up.” she said with her familiar cold tone and kept sipping her tea without looking at Dongho. He started to go upstairs and opened the door of the room Mrs. Hwang had described. The room across the stairs…it was really well designed and furnished modernly. A wall was made up of glass from end to end making possible to see all front garden and pool. In the middle, there was a king-sized bed. Every spot in the room lighted with every size of lampshades. The two nightstands were placed at two sides of the bed. Colorful armchairs were located across the television. He stopped looking around the room after seeing his baggage at the corner of the wall. He closed the door and descended the stairs with his baggage in his hand. Mrs. Hwang was reading a magazine at the armchair placed in the middle of the huge hall and a middle-aged woman in a maid uniform was clearing the breakfast table. Dongho walked towards the armchair and cleared his throat to draw Mrs. Hwang’s attention on himself. When she raised her head from the paper she was reading, Dongho said

“Mrs. Hwang. I am sorry but I think you led me to the wrong room. My baggage was over there but the furniture my mom had sent here was not.”

“Oh yes, they brought them yesterday. The ones with carvings. Right?”

“Yes. Which room are they in?”

“Unfortunately, they are not in this house, Dongho”

“What!” Dongho said in a puzzled face.

“Dear, you see there are some certain colors and designs in this house. They didn’t suit well here. So I sent them into the warehouse in the garden.”

“But..” he was cut off Mrs. Hwang’s sharp voice

“Dongho, let’s be more clear…………. I have spent months to create a style in this house. So if there is a need to decide something on the design of the house, as you see, my decisions take the precedence of the others. So, I am sorry to say that but I will not take them to this house.” Dongho froze just a moment to perceive completely what he heard. He clenched his teeth and

“Then…… wherever they are……….. I will sleep in there” Dongho said and turned his back to go out of this huge _damn_ house. He squeezed his fists with the hope of holding his tears when he slapped the main door behind him. They were the last thing his father had left for him. They were the last thing smelling like his father, as his home… And he wouldn’t let anyone disrespect to his father’s memory. This was the only thing he could do. He looked around and saw a small and wood warehouse among the trees. The tall man made his way towards it and touched the old wood door which was unlocked. He opened the door with his simple touch causing a screeching noise. When he stepped into it, the dust-filled his nose and made him cough non-stop for a few minutes. He ran towards the small windows hurriedly and opened them one by one to fell the wind filling into his lungs and his cough started to wane. He looked around again and saw all the furniture placed in the room randomly and lifted the white sheet over them making some more dust fly. He cursed at himself as he didn’t learn anything about how to clean from his mom. He didn’t know he would need it one day and cleaning was the one he hated most. Dongho breathed out and rolled up his sleeves to start. At least he could clean here enough to sleep without coughing to death.

He placed the last shirt into the wardrobe and looked at his watch. It was 5 p.m. which meant he had been cleaning in this house for 7 hours. He groaned with exhaustion and threw himself onto the bed. His all muscles were aching and he knew tomorrow it would be worse. He shot a glance at the room again and _they are really beautiful_ he thought with a warm smile. Dongho suddenly tumbled out of the bed with groaning and went towards the wardrobe to take some clean clothes. After putting on the fresh ones, he went out of the warehouse with the aim of rambling in the huge garden and making the house fill with more oxygen from the open windows and the door. It was really fascinating and a kind of a garden that people could see in the fairy animations. Every kind of flower harmonizing well with each other, every height of trees, twittering bird sounds…

After a few steps, he saw an old gardener trying to prune the withering violets. Dongho made his way towards this old man and said

“Good evenings” the old man stood up and said bowing “Thank you, sir”

“Oh no, don’t trouble yourself. Go ahead. My mom likes flowers, too” He said crouching next to the old man and smiling at him warmly.

“My name is Dongho, Kang Dongho. Yours?” the old man turned his face to Dongho and opened his mouth but they both heard Mrs. Hwang’s voice at that exact moment and stood up when they saw her approaching with her heels making a disturbing sound.

“Mr. Park!!! There are some roses that need to be pruned at the back of the garden.”

“Of course, Mrs. Hwang” the old man said and went towards the back with haste after collecting his all equipment.

“Did you like the garden, Dongho?” Mrs. Hwang trudged towards him with a smiling face.

“Yes, it is really beautiful,” Dongho said with acknowledgment and standing up.

“But its care is really difficult, too. So, we don’t occupy our employers’ time by speaking with them much.”

“I have just…”

“If you behave warmly to them, they will be spoilt to retard their works.” Dongho opened his mouth to argue back but Mrs. Hwang kept with a grimacing look on her face.

“I know it sounds ridiculous to you because you are a worker, too”

“Yes, it sounds absolutely ridiculous to me. But not because I am a worker……… but because I am a human-being” Dongho stepped forward to go back to the warehouse without waiting for any response. He wouldn’t regret what he said to Mrs. Hwang because she had been trying to insult him. He opened the door and tumbled into the bed.

.

.

Dongho opened his eyes with the sound of the door opening and then closing. He stood up from the bed rubbing his sleepy eyes and heard the same sound of heels. _I won’t retort back whatever she says_ he thought. _I won’t say anything. I won’t say anything_ he repeated over and over in his mind. And then he saw the familiar red tone of the hair at the doorsill. She looked around and turned her face to Dongho.

“_If it is well with you_, we decided to eat out tonight” Mrs. Hwang said.

“Ok.” Dongho nodded.

“Minhyun and his dad will go there as soon as the meeting ends. You and I will go there together. Can you be ready in an hour?”

“Yes.” Dongho said looking into Mrs. Hwang’s eyes.

“I left the clothes suitable for the restaurant we will go….. _In your room_. Anytime you can come and take them.” She sized Dongho up sullenly and went out from the warehouse. Dongho sighed and looked at his wardrobe.

*

“Here you are Mrs. Hwang” the chauffer said and ran to the car in order to open the door. Dongho was waiting. Mrs. Hwang trudged towards Dongho and said with a judging tone

“You didn’t wear the clothes I had left in your room”

“I am fine like that. I will be more relaxed” He was wearing a basic black T-shirt and black jeans.

“If you hurry up and wear them, I can wait”

“No. thanks, I am fine.” Dongho insisted but he saw a smirk grazing her lips and that made him feel uneasy.

“Alright,” she said and got in the car. 

After half an hour, the car stopped in front of a luxurious restaurant and the door was opened by a man in a suit. “Welcome Mrs. Hwang” the man said bowing and Dongho got off the car. _Life of the rich... Being known wherever you go_ he thought and made his way towards the pavement going to the mentioned restaurant. The man in suit averted Dongho suddenly and stopped him with his hands

“Excuse me, sir” he said and Mrs. Hwang “He is with me” said turning her face to the man. Dongho was trying to make sense of the situation and the reason for being stopped. The man kept with a worried expression,

“Mrs. Hwang, accept my apology but I can’t take the sir in with these clothes.” Dongho looked at Mrs. Hwang with wide eyes and a confused face while she was smirking which made Dongho furious and he said in an angry voice clenching his teeth “OK. Good night, then” and turned his back to hail a taxi to get away from this hell.

“Dongho!!!” he heard Minhyun calling out for him and turned his face to his husband. When Minhyun approached enough, he asked “Where are you going?” capturing Dongho’s arm to prevent his husband from going anywhere.

“I am not approved of being taken in here. I guess, my clothes are not well enough to get into this restaurant.” Minhyun turned his face to the man in the suit and said in astonishment

“Come on. Chef. We are regular customers. You know.”

“Mr. Hwang. I can’t do anything about that.” The man said bowing his head. Minhyun sighed and asked turning his face to his mother

“Mom. Didn’t you tell the rule of here to Dongho?”

“Ask him.” she argued back with a dismissive and meaningful voice. “Are you happy with what you have done, Dongho? ……If my father hears that, he will murder them or he will murder me. He will certainly kick up a fuss…We have to do something. We have to find a way.” He turned his face to the valet and

“Can you bring my car immediately?” He said giving the keys to him and turned his body to Dongho.

“Wait for me in the car” Dongho looked at Minhyun’s face without moving and Minhyun repeated with an angry voice “Can you go to the car now?” Dongho turned, rolling his eyes and walked towards the car.

“Mom. Don’t say anything to dad. I will handle it” Minhyun said wrapping his arm around his mother’s waist and they started to walk towards the table Mr. Hwang was looking at the menu. He pulled out a chair to make his mom sit down next to his dad. Mr. Hwang looked at his son and wife and “Where is Dongho?” he asked curiously. Minhyun clearing his throat said “He saw one of his friends at the door. He will come soon.”

“His friend? Here?” Mr. Hwang asked frowning.

“Anyway, I am as hungry as a bear. What are we going to eat?” Mr. Hwang kept looking at the menu with an indecisive face. Minhyun took out his phone out of his pocket stealthily taking advantage of his father’s focus on the menu.

“Hello. Seongwoo!” he said to the phone and kept after drawing his father’s attention on him.

“We can’t come..” He waited for a second and “What can I do if you threw a party for us? What! All my friends came? Five people from abroad?” Mr. Hwang raised his head from the menu and looked at his son listening to his conversation carefully.

“I would but we promised to eat out with my parents. We can’t come. Seongwoo, I am sorry. Have fun!” he separated his phone from his ear and replaced it in his pocket again. Now it was time to wait and as he guessed after a few seconds, Mr. Hwang looked at his son’s face and said “Minhyun, if you want, you can go. We can come here every time.”

“No. We got married one day ago but Seongwoo arranged a marriage party for us today”

“You go really. Many people will be disappointed if you don’t” his father said. Meanwhile, Minhyun shot a glance at his mom who was smirking.

“Ok. Then. Thank you, dad. See you at home” he leaned to kiss his mother and she whispered “You are really…”

He made his way towards the exit and saw Dongho sitting inside the car. After sitting on the driver’s seat, he turned his face to Dongho

“I am really wondering…. Is that really hard to wear a suit? I really don’t expect you of giving up on your _dependable_ jeans but just for a few hours you could wear a suit.” He started off the engine. Dongho sighed and answered back

“Wearing clothes that don’t belong to me is not my thing.”

“Lying is not my thing…” Minhyun retorted back making Dongho smile teasingly and say in disbelief “Really?”

“NEVERTHELESS, I am lying.” Dongho stayed silent for a few minutes and realized they were not going the route for home

“Where are we going?” he asked in disappointment. He wanted to go home and lie on the bed forever.

“I will introduce you to my friends” Minhyun said looking at the front.

“Friends? …I am sure they are really great people.”

“Maybe, they are not great but at least they can smile and speak….. unlike you.” He said the last part in a low voice but Dongho heard it

“Ha, you didn’t like my chat??? Tell me the subject then and I will talk about whatever you want”

“Listen to me carefully. I am telling the subject. Not to speak until we arrive at the place. How is it?” Dongho shrugged his shoulder and said

“Hımmm. There probably wouldn’t be any better subject”

“I think so, too” this was the last sentence uttered burying the drive into the silence.

It was very crowded. The music was drumming into Dongho’s ears causing his temple ache. He liked the music very much but not in places like this. He liked it when he was listening to it while walking at the riverside. He liked it when he was composing and drinking his coffee at the same time. He liked it when his mother murmuring a song while she was cooking or taking care of flowers. He liked it when they danced with Jinho and Daniel at home childishly….

He didn’t like these places at all, either. Sweat and overwhelming perfume smell lingering on the air. And people were dancing and rubbing themselves against each other seductively. The dim light was making Dongho’s eyes sting. The smell of smoke and liquor …. Seongwoo snapped Dongho out of his thoughts touching his shoulder. Dongho raised his head and stopped rubbing his temples.

“Dongho, I want to ask you something. Do you have any acquaintance named Daniel?” Dongho looked at Seongwoo questioningly and shouted to make Seongwoo hear him.

“Yes, he is my cousin. Kang Daniel. Why did you ask?”

“Nothing” Dongho raised his brows and kept looking at Seongwoo meaningfully. Seongwoo cleared his throat and said

“Really. It is nothing important” trying to be convincing. He leaned Minhyun’s ear after Dongho’s attention got disturbed and whispered trying to be unheard by Dongho “I have learned something in these 8 days.”

Minhyun waited for his friend to keep wondering what Seongwoo would say.

“The Kang family is really hot.” Minhyun smiled and elbowed his friend’s ribcage.

“Anyway, what will we drink? It is my treat” Seongwoo asked with a cheerful tone. Minhyun turned his face to his friend and said “I… vodka” Seongwoo waiting for Dongho’s request “I won’t take anything” he nodded and ordered the requests.

Time hung heavy on Dongho’s hands. He was feeling like he had been here for 2 days. But it had been just half an hour after he had entered here with Minhyun. The ache in his head was getting worse as the time tic tacked. The people inside became drunker and the liquor smell in the air was getting heavier and more suffocating. The people’s movement had already turned into the attempt of seducing each other. He turned his gaze at Minhyun and Seongwoo who seemed to be pleased with their spot and the place. They were laughing at something and messaging someone…. Seongwoo raised his face from his cell phone at last and said

“I am bored. Let’s go another place” Minhyun nodded and gestured Dongho to go out. Dongho breathed out heavily when he went out but he had been dragged another _damn _club just after half an hour. Different place, different lustful people, different music but same sultry air, same heavy smell and same sweltering temperature.

Minhyun on the phone said “Yes, we will. How is there? Hımmm, see you then.” He hung up the phone and put it into his pocket and took a sip from his round glass full of liquor. Seongwoo turned to Minhyun and said showing the screen of his phone to his friend “Jaehwan is asking for us. Let’s go there and disturb him” with an evil smile on his face. Minhyun smirked and approved by nodding his head and turned his face to Dongho

“Dongho…”

“LEAVE ME HOME” Dongho wouldn’t bear being dragged one more club tonight.

“Why? We are just hanging out with frie..”

“You are not just hanging out with your friends but hanging out with the clubs. Visit all clubs and bars, see everyone until there is no one out there you didn’t send messages and speak ridiculously. And I am going nowhere but home” He stood up from the table making a scratching noise with the push of the chair. Minhyun jumped on his feet, too puzzled by Dongho’s sudden anger.

“Dongho, where are you going?” Minhyun captured the shorter man by his shoulder and stopped him

“To find a place where people speak face to face with each other” Dongho yanked Minhyun’s hand off him and made his way to the exit.

*

The car stopped at the huge garden lightened with huge special lamps. Dongho opened the door of the car parked at the garage and went out looking at Minhyun who was closing the driver’s door.

“You didn’t have to come with me”

“That would be a really logical reason for my dad to kill me, then”

Dongho smiled at Minhyun. His eyes disappeared between his cheeks and brows. _His fascinating eye smile… _Minhyun thought. They walked together in the garden and Dongho said “Anyway. Good night” and he made his way towards the opposite way he should. Minhyun with a surprised face

“Dongho, where are you going?” this was the third time he had asked this question to this man today. _What an unpredictable man._

“To my room” Dongho answered back dismissively.

“You don’t mean ……………the warehouse, right?”

“I mean it.”

“Dongho! You are pushing my limits. That means I have to sleep in there, too”

“I know” Dongho said in a dismissive tone and turned his face to the warehouse stepping forward. He opened the door and looked at his cleaning masterpiece with a proud face. Minhyun came in after him and said looking around the old warehouse.

“It was ten years ago when I had come in here.” Dongho went into the bedroom and took off his black t-shirt leaving his upper body bare suddenly. Minhyun wasn’t expecting that. His words stuck in his throat causing an immense silence. His eyes were fighting with him to look at every detail and watch Dongho’s movements with bare chest open-mouthed. It was enough to make his heartbeat crazily just to look at this man’s eyes and now... His bare upper body with three tattoos too-much-well-harmonized with his broad shoulders and structure. He gulped and blinked too many times trying to look around with the attempt of taking his eyes off this man. Dongho leaned down and get off a white t-shirt and put it on in seconds. 

“Wi-will we sleep in the same bed?” Minhyun asked shuttering and then cursed at himself. Dongho pointing out the room said “I am sorry but we don’t have any other bed here. So…Yes, we will.” Dongho turned his back and tumbled into the small bed. “Don’t worry. I will stay loyal to the game rules”

“No- no, I-it is not” Minhyun shuttered again and his ears turned into crimson red suddenly. Minhyun knew Dongho would stay loyal to the rules forever but ……as to himself, he was not sure. He was not sure he was able to control his strong desire to touch this man. He was not sure he was able to stop himself not to kiss that man’s every inch hard.

“You can wear anything from the wardrobe” Dongho said and closed his eyes with a tired sigh. Minhyun was afraid of moving. After a few minutes of standing up in the middle of the room without knowing what to do, he stepped towards the wardrobe and chose an oversized t-shirt and shorts. He took off his suit and wore them in the darkroom. Every second he stepped towards the small bed Dongho in, his heart was beating like it wanted to go out from his chest. He prayed to the god Dongho couldn’t hear its beating. He raised the sheet and slowly sneaked into the bed feeling the temperature leaking from Dongho’s broad body. Without moving and breathing, he waited for 1 minute and turned his head to the man who had already fallen into the dreamland. He knew it would be a sleepless night as soon as he heard they would sleep in the same bed. It would be an absolute sleepless night.

The sun was leaking in from the small window across the bed. Dongho opened his stinging eyes from the sunlight and looked at the bed. Minhyun was not there. He had probably got up early and gone to the Hwangs Company. He got off the bed grumbling and opened the door of the wardrobe to choose what to wear.

After a few minutes, Dongho heard a groaning voice from the garden and he went out. It was Mr. Park grubbing with a shovel. “Why did it wither?” the old man was murmuring in front of a small tree with yellow and brown leaves not noticing Dongho was looking at him

“Mr. Park, good morning…..What happened?” Dongho asked with a smile on his face and his hands on the pockets of the trousers not to feel the chill of the morning wind.

“This tree withered, sir.” The old man said gesturing the small tree in front of him.

“I will visit my mom today. If you want, I can bring you a sapling” the younger man said.

“Thank you. I will really appreciate it, sir” the older one said smiling and bowing.

“See you in the evening, then.” Dongho turned to the warehouse with the excitement lapsing into his chest. He would see his brother, his mom, Daniel, his friends, his neighborhood, his home… 

Dongho turned the last bend and saw his mother’s crouching figure pruning the colorful flowers in the small garden. Daniel and Jinho were playing under the old tree. He looked at them and thought _just 6 months_. He would be in this scene after just 6 months. He stepped towards them and called out “Mom” Mrs. Kang raised her head from the pot and fell the small shovel from her hand to the ground. She stood up and stepped towards her son, meanwhile, Jinho yanked himself off Daniel’s hands and ran towards his brother on his thin legs with his all might… Dongho opened his arms and kneeled down capturing Jinho from his armpits and placing his brother into his lap. He breathed in the smell of his brother and kissed him countless times. He belonged here. He certainly belonged here. “Hyung.. Hyung ” Jinho repeated over and over wrapping his arms around Dongho tightly. A few moments later, He felt his mother’s small hands wrapping his waist and hugging him.

“Welcome. Dongho-yah” he smiled and placed Jinho on the ground and hugged his mother properly. “Thank you, mom.” Jinho was tugging at his trousers and clinging to him. He raised Jinho into his lap again and walked towards Daniel, his best friend with a smiling face meanwhile, Daniel trudged towards Dongho and when he approached enough, he punched Dongho’s shoulder and said

“We missed you, dumbass” Dongho placed his brother on to the ground again and pulled Daniel into a bone-crushing hug.

“I missed you, too”

They were sitting on a sheet spread over the ground under the tree after a few minutes. Dongho had missed everything about his home, his family, his friends… he looked around and closed his eyes for a moment. Jinho was resting his head onto Dongho’s crossed-legs and speaking about the game he played with his friends yesterday.

“Mr. Park is looking for a worker instead of you. Don’t say anybody you heard it from me but he is really upset.” Daniel said making Dongho laugh. Mrs. Kang sat down on the sheet after washing her hands got dirty from the soil.

She crossed her legs, too and held Dongho’s hand. Dongho could see the hesitation on his mother’s face. “Dongho, is-is she nice to you?” she asked with one breath. Dongho knew she would ask that. He smiled at her and said “Mrs. Hwang is really nice to me. Don’t worry”

“The furniture ... How are they? Did they suit well into your room?” Dongho froze but he regained his composure quickly and said smiling and feeling a pang of immense guilt inside his chest

“Y- Yes, they are really beautiful. Minhyun liked them much, too” Mrs. Kang smiled warmly at her son.

“Mom, I need a sapling. Do you have any?” Dongho said with the attempt of changing the subject.

“Yes, I have. Just wait a little” she stood from the ground went towards the back of the house. Dongho stood up, too. Daniel asked “Where?” when he saw Dongho started walking towards the house.

“I will make coffee for us.” 

Daniel said jumping on his feet “Wait. I will come, too” Dongho opened the door and looked around his real home. He turned the bend to go to the kitchen and looked at the round table in the middle of it. He could fell Daniel shadowing him. Dongho knew his best friend would ask him some _crucial_ questions. He opened the cupboard and started to take out a cup waiting nervously. Daniel spilled the beans at last.

“What happened? Tell me. How is he? I mean in bed?”

“I was just waiting curiously for the time when you would ask these inevitable questions” Dongho answered back teasingly turning his face to his friend.

“Dongho!! Don’t dare to fence or change the subject. Is he good?” Dongho stayed silent and kept taking out cups.

“Are you bottom or top?” Dongho left the cups on the countertop and turned his face to Daniel who was looking at him curiously and waiting for the answers.

“You know… I won’t answer these questions, right?” Daniel rolled his eyes in disappointment and said puffing “I know…I know. You killjoy!”

The sun was started to set down on the west side of the sky. Jinho’s eyelids were closed on Dongho’s lap probably because of the exhaustion. Dongho raised the small head from his lap and placed it on the sheet trying not to awake his little brother.

“Mom, I should go” his mother raised her head and looked at his son with a bitter smile. “Ok.” She stood up and hugged her son handling the sapling in his hand. Dongho smiled at his mother and leaned down to kiss Jinho and inhaled his smell.

“Don’t forget to visit us, Ok? Guanlin really misses you.” Daniel said hugging his friend. Dongho turned his back and walked towards the exit of the small garden. He didn’t look back because if he had, he wouldn’t be able to return the Hwangs estate. He clenched his fist and walked forward without turning and looking back.

He started to walk looking around on the road his childhood had passed. The trees swinging from the wind and making a peaceful hushing noise. The pavement stones god knows how many times he had fallen on. He was missing everything and he knew he would miss every time. He turned the first bend and saw the alley he had seen Minhyun for the first time. He smiled bitterly and when he turned his face to the road, his eyes spotted on Jonghyun, his childhood friend walking towards him. He probably hadn’t seen Dongho yet.

“Jonghyun” the broader man called out. Jonghyun raised his head and caught Dongho’s eyes for a brief moment. No, he wasn’t ready for that. He wasn’t.. and he didn’t know when he would be ready to get over the pain. He thought of running back but he was sure Dongho would follow him. _His mulish personality_. There was the only option. He quickened his steps and passed by Dongho whose musky smell filled into his lungs. He didn’t look at him, didn’t speak with him, and didn’t laugh with him. He just passed by ……………like a stranger…

Dongho wanted to run after Jonghyun and stop him but he fought with his urge clenching his fists and teeth. Jonghyun would never forgive him. But Dongho had always seen him as a close friend nothing more. Nevertheless, that was making Dongho feel pain and guilt in his chest. _Maybe_ he thought. _Maybe if he hadn’t got married, they could try it. _Because he didn’t want to lose his childhood friend. Because he didn’t want Jonghyun just to pass by. Because he didn’t want to be stranger and invisible for Jonghyun.

Dongho looked from behind his friend walking in a hurried pace. _His life had changed drastically in one week. He got married to the heir of Hwangs kingdom and moved to an estate leaving his mother and brother behind. He quitted his job at the café. He learned Jonghyun’s s feelings for him and now they weren’t even looking at each other’s faces_. Dongho was dragged out of his thoughts with the hiss of the bus he should get in to return the estate. He raised his foot to get in…

*

Dongho looked for Mr. Park as soon as he entered the huge garden and saw a younger man watering the plants and trees. He asked after approaching enough to the man in a gardener outfit.

“Excuse me. Where is the other gardener?” Dongho asked still looking around

“As I know, there is just one gardener in this house, sir and it is me.” Dongho stopped looking around and answered back with a slight smile on his face.

“No way. I spoke with him this morning, Mr. Park”

“I have started to work in the place of him. He got dismissed, sir.” Dongho’s smile disappeared suddenly. He really couldn’t comprehend the meaning of the words he had just heard for a few split seconds and couldn’t know what he should say. He was feeling a frustration swelling inside him. _It shouldn’t have been that easy to fire someone._

“I- I get it. Thank you.” Dongho said and kept “Can you please plant this?” stretching the sapling to the gardener

“Of course.” The new gardener took it from Dongho who made his way towards the estate instead of the warehouse. He entered the hall and approached the armchair, Mrs. Hwang, drinking coffee while reading some magazines.

“Mrs. Hwang. You fired Mr. Park??”

“I prefer the word –dismiss-” she raised her head from the magazine just a moment and turned to it again.

“You _dismissed_ him because he has_ just_ talked with me!!!!!” Dongho said in an accusing tone. “No, it is not. I didn’t like his labor” she said in a disturbingly dismissive way without looking at Dongho’s face.

“As I can see, he was a safe pair of hands and adept in taking care of the garden”

“He was too sentimental at work and that means failure everywhere in the world.”

“But..” Dongho was cut off with her sharp voice. “I don’t need to ask for your permission about the house works, do I?” Dongho sighed and bit his lower lip from frustration.

“No!!! You don’t need to ask. You don’t need to do anything.” He said and turned his back to go out.

*

Minhyun’s glares slid on Dongho who was turning the meat across the plate with a thoughtful face and not eating anything. They were having dinner at the big hall. Minki was out with his friends. Minhyun opened his mouth to call Dongho but his father was faster.

Mr. Hwang asked with a loving voice “Dongho! Didn’t you like the meal? If you want, we can have something else prepared” Dongho raised his head from his plate towards Mr. Hwang and said in a grateful manner.

“No. it is delicious. Thank you. I was just thinking about something.”

“Are you happy with your new home? Did you get used to it?” Mr. Hwang kept. Dongho with a small smile on his face said

“I am trying”

“Of course. It is not easy to leave parents behind. You have a little brother, too. Right?” Dongho opened his mouth to answer but Mrs. Hwang cut their small talk with her serious voice.

“Junwoo, while you are having a talk, the meal is becoming colder.”

Dongho closed his mouth leaving the fork and knife onto the plate slowly and said “In fact, I am a little bit tired. May I go to my room?” turning his face to Mr. Hwang

“Of course. You must be tired. Go and rest a little” Mr. Hwang said in a fatherly way.

“Good night” he said bowing and stood up the table making his way towards the main door to go to the warehouse.

Mr. Hwang raised his head from his plate when he heard the closing sound of the main door. Minhyun and Mrs. Hwang looked at each other nervously. Mr. Hwang sensed the anxiety in the air and asked straightening his body on the chair.

“Why did he go out?” nobody answered his question and he looked into his wife’s eyes directly.

“I guess there is something you have to tell me. What is happening Seo Eun ah., hmm?” Mrs. Hwang raised her head and left the fork and knife on the table and said staring back at his husband

“The furniture his mother had sent didn’t match well with the room so, I sent them into the warehouse.”

“So, he is sleeping in there???” Mr. Hwang said in disbelief waiting for an explanation. 

“Yes” Mrs. Hwang said in a sharp tone. Minhyun was feeling something bad would happen.

“Did he sleep in there yesterday night, too?” he was clenching his teeth. “Yes.” Mrs. Hwang said in the same dismissive way without looking at his husband. Minhyun wanted to interfere as he could see the anger rising in his father.

“Dad..”

“Stop it now” Minhyun was cut off with his father’s high and angry voice. Mrs. Hwang stood up and slammed her fist down on the table.

“There are rules in this house. Don’t dare to back him up. Junwoo. ” Mr. Hwang started to trudge towards his wife and said when he approached enough to look into her eyes

“Don’t dare to tell me what I should do. Never again”. Minhyun stood up from the table and made his way towards the door and went out to catch Dongho without anyone noticing him

“You didn’t even listen to me once for years.”

“They will be placed in their bedroom. That is it.” Mr. Hwang said in a decisive and sharp voice “No” Mrs. Hwang shouted at her husband.

“Yes, they will be. Or I will pull down this house onto your heads.”

“So this is your understanding. I chose even the vase over there among thousands. Don’t try to teach me what I will do in the house.” She slammed her fist down on the table again. Mr. Hwang stepped towards the vase his wife pointed out and shouted back

“Is it? You say you chose this among thousands.” He took the vase from the coffee table into his hands looking at it just a moment and threw it onto the floor suddenly making it fall to the pieces. Mrs. Hwang hissed and looked at the pieces scattered around like sand on the floor in a horrified face. He took two candlesticks from the coffee table, too and threw them on the pieces of vase making the chinking sound worse.

“And this, too” he raised the coffee table over his head and threw it to the floor and went out from the hall leaving behind his wife with tears in her eyes.

Minhyun jogged after Dongho and captured him by his shoulder and pulled him harshly to make this man turn towards himself.

“Dongho!!!!!!What the fuck are you trying to do?” Minhyun shouted. After Dongho recovered from the pull, “DON’T ….RAISE …..YOUR …..VOICE” he shouted back to Minhyun yanking his shoulder off Minhyun’s hold.

“I WILL. It has been just 2 days. But you have already turned my life into a nightmare” Dongho smiled in a teasing way and said in a high voice.

“So, you are calling this_ a life_. I am sorry to inform you but it is just VILENESS.”

“LOOK!!!!! KANG DONGHO!!!!You are not someone close to me. And I am not close to you. So you don’t have a right to judge me, my friends and my mother. You don’t know us and we don’t know you. You are happy in your own life, we are happy in our own lives. I have made a deal with you. You knew my life. You knew how I live and you accepted it. Is it RIGHT?” Minhyun looked into Dongho’s light brown eyes waiting for an answer but he kept

“Either play the game according to the rules or...." his voice rose.

"... LET'S PUT AN END TO IT BECAUSE I AM REALLY TIRED OF THIS SHIT!!!!"


	7. He is mine

Dongho covered the last sheet over the nightstand beside the small bed and leaned down to take his baggage into his hands to make his way out. The door was opened and closed with a creaking sound. He passed the silent and dark garden lightened with huge and special lamps. The light wind was making the flower smell linger in the air and causing a swishing sound coming from the huge trees. It was a peaceful night. Dongho sighed and entered the big hall. The first thing he saw was thousands of glass pieces scattered all around the hall on the floor and then Mrs. Hwang sitting on the chair with red and puffy eyes.

He felt a pang of immense guilt. _Whatever happens, a woman shouldn’t have cried because of his behaviors._ Dongho started to trudge towards the woman who was staring at the pieces on the floor.

“Mrs. Hwang, I am sorry…….. I am really sorry.” He said. She raised her head and looked into his eyes without uttering a word.

“If it is well with you, I am going up to my room” he bowed and started to ascend the stairs slowly. Dongho looked at the room he had seen 2 days ago and made his way towards the built-in wardrobe from wall to wall. He left the baggage on the floor and opened the huge wardrobe which was filled with too many kinds of shirts, suits, trousers, watches, and accessories.

Minhyun opened the door with a soft click and saw Dongho placing his clothes into the wardrobe. After a few seconds of silence, the taller man said “I know, you are having a hard time. But just a few months. Hang on just a few months. Everything will be fine.”

Dongho made his way towards the king-sized bed and put a small frame on the nightstand turning his face to Minhyun standing in the middle. “I know. Don’t worry. There won’t be any problem from now on. I will play the game according to the rules.” Dongho said with a decisive voice and stared at the small picture of his little brother laughing playfully. “But….” The shorter man kept without leaving his gaze on the frame. Minhyun was waiting for Dongho to finish the sentence “I want them back”

“What??” Minhyun asked curiously. He couldn’t make sense of the words going out of Dongho’s mouth.

“I want them back after 6 months, the furniture. They are the last things I have from my dad and I won’t let them rot in a warehouse. ”

*

They made their way toward the breakfast table set on the poolside. The clear blue of the water, vibrant-green trees, the twittering sound of the birds, shining sun forming small diamonds on the water. Mr. and Mrs. Hwang had been already sitting at the table. When they approached enough, Minhyun said “Good morning” pulling his chair to sit down.

“Good morning” Dongho mirroring Minhyun with a smiling face. They sat on the table and Mr. Hwang asked after he put down the cup filled with tea on the table.

“Dongho! The furniture was replaced in your room, right?”

“No,” Dongho said and he kept immediately “But no need. In fact, Mrs. Hwang was right” Dongho turned his face to Mrs. Hwang and smiled.

“They don’t match well with the room. I guess I was too emotional. I am sorry for what I have done.”

*

“After an intense workday, music is the best” Minhyun said turning up the volume of the music in the car. Dongho sighed and asked

“Will we go out every night?”

“Actually I hadn’t planned going out tonight but my father insisted. I guess he will apologize from mom” Minhyun said smiling

“Can we…can we go to a place less noisy?”

“People are spending too much money to go to the places you don’t like, you know right?”

“I know, but this is their problem”. Dongho argued back.

“Hmmm. What happened to your promise about the rules? You backed on your word on the first night?” Minhyun said growlingly. Dongho heaved and turned his face to Minhyun. he had promised to this man, so…..

“Ok. I will have fun tonight. Don’t worry.”

“That is the spirit” Minhyun smiled satisfied with the answer.

Dongho stretched his hand to Minhyun and they interlocked their hands at the entrance of the club. The place was bursting at seams. Music was too loud and the smell….Some people were dancing in the middle enjoying the beat while some were drinking their liquors sitting on the bar chairs.

“Hello,” Dongho said to the crowd of the friends smiling and stretching his hand to shake. Minhyun walked towards Seongwoo and tapped his hand onto his friend’s shoulder.

“Hello,” Minhyun said and they sat at the table. Too loud music, too overwhelming smell and intolerable heat were disturbing but Dongho shook his head to get rid of these thoughts; he had promised himself he would enjoy this night.

After half an hour, Minhyun sipped from his round glass and stood up from the bar chair he had been sitting with Dongho silently and he made his way towards a handsome and young man dancing in the middle. A man watching Minhyun and throwing seductive glances at him since they had entered the club. Dongho knew Minhyun was a man everyone would crave for but this……….Dongho clenched his teeth and watched his husband walking towards the young and attractive man. Minhyun wrapped his arm around the man’s slim waist and nosed his long neck. Dongho turned his head to the other side. There was something wrong with his chest, making him bit his lips hard. He cleared his throat and closed his eyes trying to delete the scene from his mind or not to see anything more. It really disturbed him. _You will go on with your own life and I will go on with mine _Minhyun had said that day. Yes, they were married but it was not real. It was just a game so Dongho didn’t have right to be angry with Minhyun. _This is our deal... Deal….._ he repeated over and over in his mind still not looking at the dance floor.

Dongho snapped out of his thoughts with a light but sensitive touch on his hand. He drew his hand back from the stand and looked at who it was. It was an extremely handsome man with a tall structure and beautiful face. He was like he had gone out of the fashion magazines.

“I am sorry if I scared you” the man said in low voice and smirking with a confident face contradicting with his innocent beauty.

“No, I am not scared but…”

“This is your first time being in here, right? If you came here before I would certainly remember a man like you.” The man said smirking and sizing Dongho up which made Dongho move unsettlingly. He sat down on the chair and turned his whole body towards the broader man drawing himself closer. Dongho didn’t turn his face to the man but he felt the man’s hot breath grazing his side face.

“You seem bored. You don’t like places like that, right? Would you like to drink with me at my place?” the tall man said daring to put his hand onto Dongho’s thigh and squeezing the flesh slightly. Dongho bit his lower lip and looked at firstly at the hand on his thigh and then into the man’s eyes. His patience was wearing thin with every second he felt the man’s hand on him. _Should he punch him or not?_

*

Minhyun looked sideways at Dongho sitting beside him. He was wearing a deep V-necked shirt causing the tattoo to peek slightly and his muscles to be explicit. _I can’t.. .I shouldn’t…It is just lust. _He sipped from his liquor trying to take his eyes off his legal husband. Dongho leaned on the stand more and Minhyun’s eyes slid onto his V-necked shirt again unintentionally.

He was furious, he was sleepless. Minhyun had been watching sleeping Dongho and been trying not to kiss him hard in his sleep, touch every inch of this man’s body. _It is just lust_ he thought again attempting to convince himself. _Nothing more_. _If I satisfy my need, then this ridiculous feeling will be gone, certainly will be gone_ he thought. With that thought he sipped once more and without looking at Dongho, he walked towards a young man ogling him since he had entered the club.

_I will not look back I will not look back. I will get rid of this _ he thought and stepped forward decisively. The young man smiled at the taller one and Minhyun approached him more. He wrapped his arms around the young man’s delicate waist. _He is really handsome_ Minhyun thought. _Yes, I can … I should_ closing his eyes and drawing himself near to touch young man’s long neck with his lips. He inhaled his too sweet and overwhelming smell making the young man lean back to make room for Minhyun’s lips and nose. _That is not._ He wasn’t feeling anything. His heart wasn’t beating crazily. His hands weren’t sweating extremely or he was not gasping for breath. _God damn._ He raised his head from the boy’s neck and opened his eyes turning towards the bar stand unintentionally Dongho was sitting at and he untangled his arms around the slim waist. Everything froze at that exact moment. The moment he saw a man touching Dongho’s hand. His heart started to beat in his ears and he felt something clenching in his chest. Minhyun froze and breathed out deeply making the young man look at the direction Minhyun had been looking hypnotized

“What happened?” he asked curiously. Minhyun opened his mouth to answer but words couldn’t go out of his mouth. He could just say “I am sorry” and he made his way towards Dongho. While he was fighting his way out of the crowd dancing and rubbing each other seductively, the man put his hand on Dongho’s thigh approaching his husband more and more with every passing split second

“You seem bored. You don’t like places like that, right? Would you like to drink with me at my place?” Minhyun heard the man asking and he shouted

“Dongho!!!!” out of breath. Without giving any chance Dongho to answer

“We are going home, now!” he said and turned his face away from surprised Dongho to the hand still on his husband’s thigh. The tallest man seized on the hand grabbing and separating it from his husband’s trousers and threw it in the air making the man falter.

“Let me introduce myself. I am…….**his husband**” Minhyun said pressing every word and showing the ring at his finger. Without waiting any split second, he captured Dongho’s hand and made his way out.

“What was that?” Dongho asked after they got in a taxi. “Dongho! Everyone thinks we are married. So you have to be careful” Dongho smiled and tried hard to keep his words inside his mouth.

_So you don’t have the right to nose and kiss everyone’s neck then. You ….. _ but he stopped himself before uttering any word.

*

He raised his head from the file in front of him when he heard a knock at the door.

“Mr. Kim.”

“Come, Mr. Lee” Kim Seo- Jun said standing up from the chair and gesturing the man to sit down. Mr. Lee placed his body on the leather armchair in the office and opened the file in his hands.

“Kang Dongho. 25 years old. A worker in a café. He was living with his mother and brother before marriage. His father died in a car accident 2 years ago. So he started to work a café quitting his study in the university He has a cousin named Kang Daniel and a good friend named Kim Jonghyun...He usually hangs out with them but he hadn’t mentioned his relationship with Hwang Minhyun even once.”

“You said he has a good friend but he didn’t mention about Minhyun?” Seo Jun asked frowning and putting his hands into his pockets.

“Yes, Mr. Kim”

“Ok. Anything else?”

“And his brother had a serious car accident 2 weeks ago.” Kim Seo-Jun stopped wandering around and raised his head looking into the man’s eyes.

“Exactly when?”

“On June, 12th. He was accepted to the hospital at nine p.m.”

Seo Jun smiled bitterly and kept

“What a fateful coincidence. The day we would be engaged…... His brother had an accident but he is running to his lover to accept the marriage proposal. This is getting more and more interesting. Right, Mr. Lee?” He turned his steps towards the table and picked up the phone. After a few seconds, he said in a sharp voice.

“Put me through the administrators of Severance hospital. Now.”

*

Minhyun looked at his reflection on the mirror and asked Dongho sitting in the armchair and turning the pages of a magazine without throwing a glance at the pages.

“How was your day?”

“Fine” Dongho answered dismissively. “What did you do?” Minhyun tried again but...

“Nothing” the shorter male said

“Nice. So this is the end of our daily conversation as husband and husband. Then, let’s go”

Dongho raised his head from the papers and asked looking up Minhyun

“Where are we going?”

“We will meet with Seongwoo in the club we went to last night”

“What if I don’t come tonight? And you get a chance to have fun as you want.” Dongho asked with the hope of hearing Minhyun’s approval.

“You in; me out. My dad will absolutely kill me. No way. I don’t want to die at such a young age. Not to mention my mom’s Sherlock instincts.”

“I didn’t say I would be in” Dongho said hopefully and looked at Minhyun’s face.

“Where will you go?” the taller man asked curiously. In fact, he didn’t want Dongho to go anywhere without him.

“To the riverside. Han River. You can pick me up there when you want to return home, hmmm?” Dongho said smiling and staring at Minhyun with wide eyes. The shorter kept when he felt Minhyun’s reluctance “I can send you location”.

“Alright then.” Minhyun sighed and they went out of the bedroom to make their ways to the garage.

*

Dongho looked at the sky and saw many stars trying to lighten the darkness but failing. He sighed and glared at the man sitting on the bench and drinking beer while watching the river. Dongho sat beside the man and said

“Hello, Jonghyun-ah…”Jonghyun looked at the owner of the voice with a surprised face. The voice he would know every time, everywhere. The shorter man tried to stand up but the taller captured him by shoulders and said

“Don’t. Let’s talk, Kim Jonghyun” Jonghyun smiled bitterly. He was captured at last. He knew Dongho would corner him someday. The shorter man sighed and sat down without looking at Dongho’s face.

“It is really strange your being here. How did you find me?” Jonghyun asked circling the rim of the can with his slim finger.

“Daniel sometimes can be very useful.” The taller man answered back staring at the magnificent river view. Jonghyun cracked a smile when he remembered Daniel’s calling and asking him about his whereabouts insistently.

He was tipsy and light-headed but he knew he was not drunk enough to imagine Dongho. The man he loved was really here, sitting on the bench with him.

“You are here, by my side at this late hour.” he uttered sloppily, not looking at Dongho

“Yes, I am here… Like in the old days." Jonghyun felt the anger rising in his chest, making his blood boil in his veins._ How is it like in the old days? while you are married.... while I am feeling a contagious pain in my heart?_

“No! No! It is not!!!!” he snapped back unable to control his anger that trying to surface and made Dongho turn his face to him.

“Why? Because I got married?” Dongho almost whispered looking into his eyes, not leaving his gaze for a moment as if he didn't know the answer.

The shorter male smiled but asked desperately

“Why did you do that? Ok. I get it. I am just a friend to you nothing more but the man you got married? He is not someone you can want to marry. I thought I knew you very well but I was wrong. I don't know.... you, Dongho” murmuring himself. He was aware his raspy and drunk voice was getting slower and huskier.

“No, you are not. You are not wrong. I am still your friend. Jonghyun-ah." Dongho let out a sigh and kept not letting Jonghyun say anything.

"Just.....Life is wafting us to the places we don’t want to be and we can’t resist. It took and threw me into Hwangs. That is it.” Jonghyun's mind stopped functioning for a moment. What did that mean? _....To the places, we don’t want to be..._

“Didn’t you want to marry him?!!!” Jonghyun whispered almost in a daze created by Dongho's sentence._ I know him. There is something wrong_ . Something wrong with this marriage.

He turned his body to Dongho completely with a puzzled face and looked into his friend’s eyes with the attempt of searching for an answer.

Dongho cleared his throat and stood up from the bench in haste. _What the fuck was he thinking while he was spilling out? God damn_. Jonghyun was his friend for years, of course, he would catch every slight thing.

“Don’t ask. But believe me. I didn’t do anything wrong.”

The taller man made his way towards the main road and hailed a taxi praying for Jonghyun not following him. The moment he opened the door to get in, Jonghyun captured him by arm looking at Dongho with sharp eyes

“You don’t love him.” Jonghyun said. This wasn't a sentence that was uttered with wonder but certainty. Dongho yanked his shoulder off Jonghyun’s grab and didn’t let him speak more and said in haste before getting in the taxi

“Stop, please!! And go home safely”

*

Minhyun sipped the last drop of his glass and reached it up to barman again. His brain had already started to become unfunctional. The dim light was increasing his want for sleep let alone the slow music echoing in the walls of the bars. He leaned down closing his eyes and rested his head on his hands. A small but sensitive touch on his back made him raise his head and turn towards a man sitting beside him.

“Dance with me” he said leaning into Minhyun’s ear in a charmer and low voice.

“If I stand up, I will fall.”

“I can catch you” the man said using his seductive voice again and leaning closer. Minhyun felt the man’s hand sliding on his shoulder and the other one grabbing his hand. Minhyun felt the heaviness of the ring at his finger but his hand sneaked around the man’s waist and he started to caress the man’s back up and down. The man hummed and looked into Minhyun’s eyes for a moment before leaning down to catch Minhyun’s lips but the taller man reacted faster and drew himself back untangling his arms from the man.

“I am sorry. I am married.” The tall man rolled his eyes and stood up from the chair stepping forward to the dance floor. Minhyun watched the man moving away for a few seconds and rubbed his face with his hands in a furious way. _Is it really that hard to kiss someone else?_

After a few minutes, Seongwoo came near his friend and asked “Are you Ok, Minhyun?” “Yeah, I am,” he said in a dismissive way.

“Minhyun, let’s wash your face, hmm?” Seongwoo said worried and tried to grab his friend’s arm but Minhyun yanking his arm from Seongwoo’s hold said

“Yaah! I said I am fine.” Seongwoo grabbed his friend’s arm again and insisted “Let’s…” when they stood up from the chair staggering side, Dongho entered the club and started to walk towards them with a smiling face.

Minhyun’s eyes widened when they spotted on Dongho walking towards him. He felt unreasonable but genuine happiness in his chest

“Dongho! You came.” He said with grateful manner while Dongho was sizing his husband having difficulty in standing up “What happened to you?” Dongho asked in a teasing way.

“I guess I overdrank a little bit. I will come to myself soon.” Minhyun defended himself and Seongwoo cracked a smile turning his face to Dongho

“Dongho. You had better take him home.”

“ No!!!!” Minhyun snapped back “It is starting now. Please Dongho!”

“Ok. Love. Let’s stay a little bit more...” Minhyun looked into Dongho’s smiling eyes. _Just a word. _Just a word going out of this man’s mouth was making his heart race crazily. _Love._

Dongho grabbed Minhyun’s waist and made him sit at the bar chair sitting beside him. a few moments later, a man in a suit approached them and said to Dongho

“Where were you? Man. Don’t leave him alone. He is going crazy and staring around hungrily.” Dongho didn’t like the man’s insolent attitude and felt an urge to punch this man. He clenched his teeth sneaking his arm around Minhyun’s waist with the aim of pulling him closer and said

“Did you touch him? In that case, I will have to break your limbs” Dongho said threateningly and looking into the man’s eyes directly. The man sized the broader man up and left without answering. Minhyun cracked a smile suddenly. Dongho pulled back his arm around Minhyun’s waist. As soon as the broader man pulled himself back, Minhyun felt extremely cold, aimless and angry without his man’s hand on him. He felt angry....cold...._I will certainly feel the warmth of it again._

“Dongho..!!!” Minhyun called out Dongho’s name softly and Dongho turned his face to the man calling him. Everything happened in a split second; Minhyun captured Dongho’s nape with both hands and pulled him hard towards himself to make their mouths crash into a kiss. Lips on lips... _His lips on Dongho’s lips_. _Soft, warm and delicious_ were the first things Minhyun thought and he knew he was craving for more. The taller man pressed his hand hard on Dongho’s nape to make the closest closer. The closest wasn’t enough.

He felt Dongho grabbing and tugging at his shirt from behind and resisting the kiss trying to get away from Minhyun. But it wouldn’t be so easy. The taller man tilted his head to the left and took Dongho’s closed lips into his mouth fully sucking them hungrily. He bit them a little bit hard and heard a groan coming from Dongho’s throat. Dongho still pulling the shirt opened his mouth partly and murmured into Minhyun’s mouth

“Mm-Min-” Without losing any split second, Minhyun pushed his tongue into Dongho’s mouth. The shorter male froze when he felt Minhyun’s tongue sliding onto his teeth, his tongue, and his lips. He stopped tugging at Minhyun’s shirt and his hands fell to his side.

The taller man felt Dongho’s resist was subsiding and took advantage of the lack of resistance. Minhyun pulled his right hand away from Dongho’s nape slowly and slid it into this man’s shirt caressing the flesh under it. Even his drunk brain could identify the perfection of it. The perfection of this man’s lips and perfection of the moment. Since the first day of their encounter, he had wanted to do that. To touch this magnificent man. To feel his body. To kiss him hard. Minhyun couldn’t differentiate the bass of the music and his beating heart anymore. He angled his head once more and pressed harder sliding his tongue into his husband’s mouth again. _More…Not enough. More… _He thought and his hand caressing Dongho’s chest behind the shirt slid towards the man’s waist pulling him closer. Minhyun could feel the heat radiating from Dongho’s chest and his other hand on Dongho’s nape moved downwards to Dongho’s broad shoulders hugging him. The kiss …Wet, open-mouthed and sensitive….His lips were aching but he didn’t want to stop. He sucked, bit, and licked every inch of Dongho’s hot cavern making him moan into Dongho’s mouth.

He pulled away from the kiss sucking the lips once more but not untangling his hands all over the man. If he hadn’t needed a breath, he would have probably kissed that man forever. He was out of breath when he brought his forehead against Dongho’s. Dongho was out of breath, too. The taller man cracked a smile and moved forward once again to put a simple kiss on those lips. He smooched and looked into Dongho’s eyes. He was smiling with his swollen, shiny and red lips. _This man is mine_ Minhyun thought.

“Minhyun” Dongho said trying to slow down his breathing but not stepping back from his spot. The taller man could still feel Dongho’s hot breath on his face. It was a perfect, impeccable feeling. “Come with me. I have something to tell you” Dongho kept smiling and held Minhyun’s hand entwining it with his own hand. Minhyun was mesmerized maybe because of the kiss, maybe because of this man’s eye smile, maybe because of the hand interlocked with his…

Dongho made his way towards the restroom with Minhyun and looked around after opening the door. He let go of Minhyun’s hand and listened to every slight noise that would inform them about any existence in the restroom. There was no one. The shorter male turned his face to Minhyun and trudged towards him slowly locking his eyes with the taller man’s eyes. After approaching enough, Dongho punched him with his all might causing Minhyun to stagger and groan in pain.

“If you touch me...... once more without my approval, I will kill you!!!!!...... Did you get it?!!!!” he shouted. Minhyun shook his head to recover from the effect of the punch and looked at the man, literally fuming

“Dongho. It is just…

“I SAID... Did you get it?” the shorter man’s shouting was getting louder and louder. Minhyun nodded.

“Now wash your face and then we are going home.” Dongho said in a high voice and left Minhyun inside the restroom looking at himself at the mirror and feeling _slight_ guilt for what he had done but he knew he would have done the same thing even if time had gotten turned back.


	8. Dreams

Minhyun looked at his figure in the mirror… At his slightly-swollen cheek checking the slight bruise with his finger and hissed. He turned his body to the man who was lying on the bed and not leaving his gaze from the phone in his oversized T-shirt. The taller man walked towards the bed and said “You know, right? You are really cruel. I have already apologized nearly for a thousand times and... **I ...was drunk.”**

“And you are still” Dongho snapped back without looking at his husband.

“You don’t even allow me to apologize!” Minhyun said approaching more to the king-sized bed located in the middle of the room

“So!!!! You think apologizing will compensate your ridiculous behavior” Dongho said finally looking at Minhyun’s face and waiting for a reasonable answer from the tall man. Minhyun couldn’t find a word to say. Dongho was right…It was a ridiculous move. Kissing your-not-real-husband hungrily was ridiculous. Thinking it was just because of lust was ridiculous. Even now desiring to kiss him again was ridiculous. Everything he felt when he looked at this man’s eyes was ridiculous…

“You, you …you are the most mulish person I have ever seen in my life.” The taller man said, at last, making Dongho raise his head and snap back furiously

“And I am the most clever person you have ever seen in your life” Minhyun grinned with a teasing expression and said placing his lower back onto the head of the armchair located exactly across the bed.

“_More clever ones_ are running after me; you know right??”

“Yeah, I saw…You are surrounded by looonnng- necked geniuses!!!”

“So…you are jealous??” Minhyun said surprised at the fact that Dongho had seen everything. He had thought the shorter man hadn’t been paying any attention what he had done but…

“Ha-ha. Don’t make me laugh. ” Dongho said with a nervous expression on his face. He wasn’t jealous… he knew it. But it had irritated Dongho enough to feel the urge to pull Minhyun back from the _long-necked man_………**_Or is it really jealousy? Anyway_**… the shorter man kept furiously.

_“_And let me remind you; I was not the one who slapped the man’s hand on my thigh.” Dongho pulled the sheet over himself and turned his back to hide his red cheeks and put an end to this ridiculous conversation without waiting for Minhyun’s answer. Minhyun froze. Dongho was right again… Minhyun was absolutely jealous… he knew it. But he had realized that the exact feeling he had felt in his chest was furiousness. _Why did Dongho let that scumbag touch him? Why did he get punched when he kissed his legal husband? _Minhyun heaved a furious sigh and stepped towards the bed. He pulled the sheet hardly making Dongho’s shoulders and a part of his body remain coverless. And the taller man said loud enough to make hear Dongho

“And they were insisting on making me married. Thanks for reminding me why I hadn’t wanted to marry in the first place.” before lying near the man trying to stay away as much as possible and turned his back to Dongho.

“Same” Dongho argued back and murmured silently “I hope you have a nightmare”

…….

Dongho opened his eyes with the sound of a knock at the door. He raised his head supporting his body with his elbows and looked around trying to make sense of the place. It was_ their_ bedroom. He rubbed his eyes and scratched his ruffled hair.

“Minhyun!” Dongho called out with his sleepy and raspy voice looking at the taller man’s face displaying all beauty and innocence. His pouting and red lips, long eyelashes creating small and slight shadow onto his white and pale skin, his light brown hair scattered all over his forehead and looking like softer than the cotton. _He is really beautiful_ Dongho thought and kept looking at the man sleeping. He cleared his throat before his thoughts slid something else and tried once more in a louder voice.

“Minhyun!!!!” There was no sign again. _He had drunk liters of liquor last night; of course, he wouldn’t wake up with just calling. _Dongho slid his body closer towards the man sleeping. Just a moment he looked at his husband’s face again… and then he felt a strong desire to inhale this man’s smell._ What the fuck is he thinking? Wondering this man’s body smell…_He couldn’t fight with himself anymore and leaned down slowly without leaving his gaze at this beautiful face…. until another knock echoed in the room. He immediately straightened his body up in the bed and tried to cool down his burning cheeks before shaking Minhyun with his hand.

“Minhyun!!”

“Mmmm” Minhyun hummed in pleasure and murmured “Don’t!!... Hyunbin-ah” it took just a moment for Dongho to understand Minhyun was talking in his sleep. The shorter man sighed furiously and whispered trying not to be heard by the one who knocked at the door “Hyunbin???” Minhyun groaned moving slightly in the bed and hummed again

“Minho…”

Dongho felt an unbearable instinct to kick that man out of the bed and said “You will see Hyunbin and Minho if your dad hears that”

“Dongho…..” Minhyun said in an extremely soft and wobbly voice making Dongho puzzled. The shorter man thought Minhyun woke up…….but it wasn’t the case. The taller man was still talking in his sleep. Dongho cleared his throat and tried to stop the heat spreading over his face. He shook his head and grabbed the sheet before pulling it hardly making Minhyun wake up with a start. The taller man opened his eyes and straightened his body in the bed rubbing his face

“Yaaaahhhh!!What is happening??” He asked furiously turning his face to Dongho but…… Minhyun …….he wasn’t expecting Dongho to be so close and that made Minhyun gulp nervously. Being nervous around Dongho had already become his accustomedness for 3 weeks. He tried to ignore Dongho’s light brown eyes looking into his eyes. Minhyun was afraid… he was afraid these eyes would see his soul. He closed his eyes for a moment and asked furiously.

“Is this your way to wake people up?

“You deserved it.” Dongho snapped back.

“You…. You….. You are really a maniac, you know why? There is no human being who slept at night and resumed the fight in the morning.”

“It is not resuming, this is new.”

“Can I ask what the reason is? My sleeping innocently???”

“Innocently???? You were talking about Hyunbin and Minho in your sleep and you are calling this innocent???” Dongho asked with widened eyes.

“What of it?” Minhyun snapped back feeling wiggle in his chest.

“And me!!!!!” Minhyun flustered just a moment. Of course; he would. This man was the only one he had wanted to kiss, to touch that much. He didn’t know the reason but the idea of touching someone else or someone else’s touching him was enough to make him feel sick. Minhyun gained his composure again and looked into Dongho’s eyes for a few split seconds not knowing what to say and then he said suddenly remembering Dongho’s murmur before sleep.

“I probably had a nightmare” standing up from the bed and making his way towards the bathroom.

*

“Seo-Eun-ah. I don’t want Minki to go back again. I want him to stay here and live with us.” Mr. Hwang said after placing his cup onto the table and waited for his wife’s answer

“I am sure, he will not want to stay with us, and he loves fun more than his family.” Mrs. Hwang said looking at her husband.

“Don’t make excuses again and don’t make a decision on your own. We didn’t even call him for his brother’s wedding and that was too much. Seo Eun-ah!”

“Because I knew he wouldn’t come”

“But he came. You were wrong. We were wrong”

“Junwoo!” Mrs. Hwang said with a soft voice and kept “Please, don’t start it up again.”

“He is our son. And I don’t think to send him away is a reasonable solution.”

“You are backing him up again”. She said and stood up from the table with an upset expression. Dongho and Minhyun entered the big hall and they said “Good morning” with cheerful tone but Mrs. Hwang didn’t respond and went out of the hall.

Minhyun looked at his father and asked wondering what made his mother look so sad “What is happening, dad?”

“Nothing, don’t worry” Mr. Hwang said and kept filling his mouth.

“Did you sleep well?” The old man asked smiling at Dongho and Minhyun after chewing and swallowing the food. Dongho placed himself on the chair across Minhyun’s and replied with a nervous smile on his face

“Ye-yes, we slept very well” Dongho stuttered. _He is really bad at lying_ Minhyun thought and looked at his father who seemed not realizing Dongho’s nervousness.

“Well, then, have a good meal” Mr. Hwang said and made a move to stand up from the table.

“Dad!” Minhyun called out and kept “Can we have a talk just a moment?” causing his dad to sit down on his place again.

“Of course!” the old man said curiously wondering what his son wanted to talk about. Minhyun gulped and said after turning his body to his father.

“This is very crucial to me……. I have been dreaming of running a club for years... I have canceled it until now and I want to make it real”

Mr. Hwang furrowed his brows and sighed. _What else he expected from his son!!!_

“We have found the place. It is really great and this is a profitable business.”

The old man looked at his son who was talking fervently and said after the younger stopped talking

“And it is funny, right? Every night at the club, leaving your husband at home.” Dongho raised his head and looked at the father and his son. _How was he included into this conversation?_

“I won’t let you, Minhyun!”

“Dad!” Minhyun said surprised.

“**Forget it!!!”**

“Dad! Please.”

**“Enough!!!”** Mr. Hwang slapped the table and stood up from the breakfast table leaving Minhyun and Dongho alone.

Minhyun looked behind his father with open-mouth. _Every time he had tried….every time …_

“**GOD DAMN IT**!!!” Minhyun shouted slapping the table hardly making Dongho look at him with a puzzled and worried face. The taller one swiped all the plates down on the floor causing too-much-shrinking glass noise and thousands of pieces scattering all over the floor...

“What are you doing? Minhyun!! Stop it.” Dongho said urgently stretching his hands and taking Minhyun’s hands into his to prevent the taller man from hurting himself.

*

“The next news is about the destructive natural force hit the southern coastal area of the Republic of China” the newscaster said with his charismatic voice. Dongho raised his head from his phone and looked at the TV. A middle-aged char left a coffee for the shorter man on the small table across the armchair and he thanked her.

Meanwhile, Minhyun was trying to focus on the news and not to think about the conversation with his dad –actually wasn’t be able to pay any attention to TV-

Mr. Hwang walked towards the hall with some papers in his hand and said before placing himself on the sofa with an exhausted sigh. “Tomorrow, I want you to conduct the executive board meeting instead of me, Minhyun. And you should get accustomed to conduct the business without me”. The old man kept looking at his son. Minhyun’s eyes were still glued on TV without giving any slight attention to his father. Dongho raised his head from his phone again and looked at Minhyun’s expressionless face worriedly.

“Did you hear me?” The old man said a little bit louder leaning towards the sofa Minhyun was sitting on.

“Yes, I heard” Minhyun said dismissively still not leaving his gaze at the TV.

“What is this face, then? ….Still that club matter?” Minhyun stayed silent pressing his lips into a thin line. Dongho could see Mr. Hwang’s anger was rising by seconds.

“Answer me!” the old man said raising his pitch of voice and looking at his son. Minhyun sighed furiously and turned his face to his father at last.

“What do you want me to answer? Dad! Do you really care what I say or what I think?”

“Look!...” Mr. Hwang started to talk but Minhyun cut his father off without giving any chance to the old man for snapping back.

“Have you ever backed my decisions up once? Have you ever allowed me to make my dreams real?.... Say whatever you want but you should know you can’t suppress me like that.” Dongho could see the tension lingering in the air. Mr. Hwang was ready to snap at his son. The moment the old man opened his mouth to talk, Dongho did what he shouldn’t have and said the first thing that came into his mind.

“Hmmm, excuse me!!! Mr. Hwang. I want to tell you something” he voiced hesitantly pulling all attention onto him in the room.

Minhyun looked at his husband wondering what made the shorter man cut in the argument. Dongho caught Minhyun’s eyes just for a short moment and turned his face to Mr. Hwang and kept talking

“It is my mistake.” Mr. Hwang raised his brows not leaving his gaze at his-son-in-law and waited for Dongho to keep.

“That was **OUR** dream: me and ….Minhyun. I am sorry…..I encouraged him to…..to talk with you” Dongho said looking into the old man’s eyes directly trying not to shutter and be convincing as much as possible.

“Why didn’t you tell me at the beginning?” Mr. Hwang asked turning his body to his son. Dongho answered immediately without giving an opportunity Minhyun to answer.

“I refrained from you! I am really sorry.” Mr. Hwang turned his face to Dongho and said with a genuine smile on his face “No, you don’t need to be” and kept with a sigh.

“Ok, then” he said making Minhyun leave his gaze from Dongho and look at his father bewilderedly

“What!!!”

“I will observe your work and decide in time” the old man said calmly

“That means…. I can start it up, right?”

“Yes, you can.” Mr. Hwang said and Minhyun looked at Dongho with a smiling face.

Maybe he wasn’t able to confess even to himself but he was feeling it in his every bone Dongho was the best thing that happened to him.

\------------

Seongwoo breathed out closing his eyes for a moment with the attempt of calming down a little bit. _Why am I like this?_ At this early in the morning, standing in front of the café and trying to catch a glimpse of Daniel’s figure from the glass door. The bright sun was shining on the glass and making hard to see. He should have been helping Minhyun to decide on the decoration of their newly-bought club but he was stalking a bunny teeth man here. He had been furious since the day he had laid his eyes on this man who had been haunting him every second, every minute, every hour of every day. The tall man had tried every possible way to blow off the steam and forget about this beautiful man. Going to every clubs, drinking liquors, messing around with the men and women, sleeping with countless of them. But even his drunk brain had managed to linger on that bunny teeth man again. Seongwoo really couldn’t make sense of what he had felt. He hadn’t even talked with Daniel properly but there was something pulling him to this man like magnets. _Beauty? Handsomeness? No; something more special. Anyway, _he thought. That was the first time he had felt so much nervousness in his blood. He was generally self-confident but when it came to Daniel, he was having difficulty in putting the words together. His tongue automatically was starting to stutter while his hands to sweat, his pulse to beat, and his ears to drum…

He exhaled again and tried to slow down his heart-beat. He would just enter and drink a morning coffee like a usual customer buying drinks before going to office.. The tall man stretched his hand towards the handle and heard the soft clicking sound of the door when he pulled it. The café was exactly like he had remembered. The intense coffee smell harmonized really well with the refreshing cocoa smell. Small wood tables placed all around. The long cylinder lights dangling from the low ceiling. A huge glass exhibiting all kinds of sweets and behind that stand…. Kang Daniel with his fascinating smile... He collected his courage and walked towards the counter.

“Ca- Can I have an Americano, please?”

Daniel turned his face to the voice and froze as if he was glued on the floor. This man was …. that man. The same man he had seen on the same chair a month ago. The same man who was caressing a beautiful woman sensitively with closed eyes on Dongho’s wedding day. The same man Daniel had been waiting for his coming over the café since the first time Daniel had seen him in a black suit sitting and rubbing his temples. But the wait was in vain ………….. until now. They caught each other’s eyes and a long, unreasonable minute passed. The stare wasn’t awkward; in fact, they felt like it was the most natural thing in the universe.

“Welcome. Sure, it will be prepared in a few minutes.” Daniel said bowing and turning towards the machine with a glass in his hands. He couldn’t stop his grinning. Maybe it was ridiculous but he was hoping to see that man since the wedding day. That man who had sharp lines with small and heart-shaped face. Three moles placed on his cheek like a star cluster making him look more natural and manlier. He had a tall and broad body and he was like an actor rushed out of a movie. It was really disappointing for Daniel to see him touching a woman intimately but he hadn’t been able to control his pulse rising when this man had sat down on the chair next to his on that day.

A shrinking sound snapped Daniel out of his thoughts and turned his head towards the source of the sound. Guanlin was trying to collect huge broken glass pieces with his right hand. _What a careless boy_. Daniel left the Americano on the counter and walked towards his friend.

“Yah, Guanlin! Be careful! You will hurt yourself.”

“I missed Dongho hyung.” Guanlin said suddenly without looking at Daniel who sighed before crouching near his friend and Guanlin kept “We can’t handle that. It is really exhausting. Daniel hyung.” Daniel nodded with acknowledgment and said “Mr. Park should hire one more person”

“He is looking for but..”

“Excuse me!” Daniel heard the tall man’s voice and stood up hurrying towards the counter leaving Guanlin to clean the pieces. _SHIT.._ he totally forgot about the orders..

“I am sorry. I will prepare a new one for you” he said with a smiling face taking the cold drink from the counter and started to make a new one hurriedly.

“No… no.. it is not. I would just ask where the administrator room is.”

Daniel cursed at himself turning to the man and pointed the small hall “That way” the tall and extremely handsome man made his way towards the room with a grinning face.

Daniel turned his body to Guanlin who was pouring the glass pieces into the bin and said with a worried tone

“I hope he won’t complain about us. Or we will both be locked out tonight”

Guanlin returned to clean the tables while Daniel was trying to prepare the orders for the office workers. After exactly 15 minutes, he heard Mr. Park and the stranger’s steps and raised his head from the glass. Mr. Park called out his and Guanlin’s name

“Daniel! Guanlin! Come here. I have something to tell you” Daniel gulped with the thought of being reprimanded in front of that man and caught Guanlin’s puzzled eyes for just a moment. They both trudged toward Mr. Park. The old man smiled and put his hand on the tall man’s shoulder.

“Let me introduce him to you. This man is your new co-worker from now on. Ong Seongwoo.” Seongwoo smiled and said slightly bowing “I am Ong Seongwoo. Nice to meet you”

Daniel looked at Seongwoo with open-mouthed and thought S_hitt!!!!._

_*_

“What!!! You have started to work in the café????” Minhyun asked with his too-loud voice coming out unintentionally. Meanwhile, Seongwoo was just grinning probably because of his friend’s amazement.

“What!!! Can’t I?” Seongwoo asked raising his one eyebrow and leaning on the sofa.

“Yaah! You know it is not about your being able to work but the reason why you decided to work. Is there something wrong? Seongwoo! You parents didn’t disinherit you??? Did they??? I can help you, my friend. ” Seongwoo rolled his eyes and thought about how Minhyun had the ability to talk without the necessity of air.

“Hwang Minhyun! Please teach me how to survive without breathing later, hımmm?” Dongho grinned at Seongwoo’s comment and took the coffee cup into his hand from the table.

“No, they didn’t. I just wanted to work. That is it.” Minhyun raised his brows to show he wasn’t convinced and then said 

“And you want me to believe that?...” Dongho watched Minhyun and Seongwoo realizing he had missed his friends too much; Daniel, Jonghyun, Guanlin… eating, playing, talking with them. _I should really visit them sooner_ he thought and snapped out his thoughts with the cheerful melody of his phone. He pulled it out of his pocket after standing up from the sofa not to interrupt Minhyun and Seongwoo’s conversation. He looked at the caller. It was an unknown number.

“Hello!” Dongho said after sliding the green icon to reply meanwhile Minhyun had half ear on Dongho, wondering who called at this late hour.

“Hello. Is this Kang Dongho?”

“Yes.”

“I am Park Hyo Rin from Seoul University hospital.” **_Hospital? _** Dongho could hear the background sounds; beeping, running, shouting and so many cringing noises. His heart started to beat painfully fast and his hands to sweat making hard to hold the phone in his hands. _Why did he get called from the hospital?_ He breathed out nervously waiting for the woman to keep.

“I called to inform you Kang Jinho has been admitted to our hospital half an hour ago. He is fi…” Kang Jinho… Kang Jinho…The phone slid down and crushed at the floor making Minhyun and Seongwoo stop talking and turn heads towards Dongho. Minhyun stood up from the sofa and made his way towards his husband with haste. There was something wrong. Something bad, really bad. The taller man captured Dongho by his shoulders and called out with a soft voice “Dongho!!” there was not any slight reaction. He stepped forward to look at Dongho’s blank face.

Terrifying break sequel, blood, white t-shirt, small hands fallen aside, motionless body… Every scene, every _damn_ scene passed in front of his eyes. **NO, NO WAY, NOT AGAIN…** he couldn’t breathe and heard a groan coming out of his own throat.

“Ji-Jinho…Jinho!!” Minhyun cupped Dongho’s face and said

“Dongho! Look at me, please” trying to make the man look into his eyes. He was pale as if all color had been drained out of his body. When their eyes met finally, Minhyun saw 2 things in Dongho’s eyes; _fear and sorrow._

*

Minhyun dragged Dongho out of the estate and got into Seongwoo’s car before speeding up on the roads of Seoul. Minhyun realized Dongho’s squeezing his hands into fist. The taller male stretched his right hand leaving the wheel to hold this tight fist and made Dongho look into his eyes. He didn’t want to see any pain in this man’s eyes and whispered softly

“He is fine. Trust me”

Dongho opened the door without waiting for the car to stop completely. He ran inside the huge hospital building. His brain was repeating over and over _Not again, not again, not again_. He was so scared to see Jinho motionless, in bloody clothes, not responding to any of his questions. His ears were drumming making him feel dizzy while his limbs trying hard to hold him straight

“Minhyun, Dongho!!! To the 12th floor, 1248” Seongwoo shouted from the front of the information desk towards the men running to the elevator. Minhyun grabbed Dongho and got into the elevator punching the 12th-floor button. _Please, please..._ He looked at Dongho who squeezed his eyes tightly and was trying to breathe properly. He instinctually put his hand onto Dongho’s shoulder when the beep sound informing them they had arrived at the 12th floor came out. They both scrambled out.

“Which room?” Dongho managed to ask. That was the first sentence he uttered since the call.

“1248”

Dongho clenched his fist again and browsed all the numbers on the hall. When his eyes landed on the right room number, his feet stepped forward. He clutched on the door handle but… _what if he sees Jinho motionless again?... _He gulped and opened the door using the last of his strength. He entered the room.

“Hyung” Dongho heard Jinho’s cheerful voice and saw Daniel patting his small head. His brother was breathing, talking, sitting on the hospital bed still in his usual clothes. Just a small bandage wrapped around his head, just a small scratch … he let out the breath he had been holding. His lungs were burning but the only thing he felt was blankness. Just a moment later, he heard Minhyun calling out his name “Dongho! Let’s go out just a little bit” and he was dragged out of the room and the taller closed the door behind them.

Dongho breathed out again and felt the last strength draining from his legs. He fell onto his knees and hot tears started to pile up in his eyes... Minhyun crouched near him and cupped Dongho’s face looking into his teary eyes.

“Dongho…you will scare him..” he said with a soft voice and wrapped his arms around the broader man’s shoulder hugging him tightly. The taller was just hoping to make all pain disappear from his husband’s face.

“Sssshhhh. He is fine…..he is fine” he said patting on his husband’s back. He felt Dongho’s head fall onto his shoulder and silent tears soaking his shirt.

*

There was a meowing sound coming out of somewhere. It was dark, really dark. But he could hear cheerful songs playing somewhere. He knew there was an amusement park near. Instinctually he turned his back and saw Jinho running towards the main road.

“Jinho!!!!” he shouted but the voice didn’t come out. **_NO…...NO… NO. _**He tried to run and grab him but he couldn’t move. His limbs weren’t moving as if they had been glued to the floor. He felt his breath knotting in his throat.

“No, Jinho!!!!!” he heard his shouting and then the same scene engraved in his memory.

**_NO…...NO_**.

Dongho opened his eyes panting and sweating heavily. He heard Minhyun’s soft voice near his ear. He was in their bedroom. Jinho was fine. Everything was fine.

“Sssshhh.. it is over” Minhyun said turning his face to Dongho and drew himself closer to his husband wrapping his arms around the man and started to pat his back. He didn’t care what Dongho would think. He just wanted to hug him and make Dongho forget all the bad things that happened to him. The dim light was leaking from the small gap between dark curtains. Maybe the sun was about to rise…

“It is just a nightmare. It is over” the taller male whispered. He could still feel Dongho’s hasty breaths on his neck.

“He is fine. Everything is fine.” he kept patting the broader man’s back until his breath turned to the normal pace. Minhyun could feel Dongho was starting to fall into sleep again and then he heard the shorter murmur “I am sorry” Minhyun didn’t know why Dongho apologizing but he said

“Sssshhhh. You don’t need to be” he drew himself back a little to look at his husband’s half-sleeping face and suddenly he stretched his hand caressing his husband’s sweaty hair fallen onto his brows and he brushed the wet strands of hair away to look at that face more clearly.

“It is over” Minhyun whispered hugging his husband again.

Dongho could feel the hot, regular and tingling wind on his neck and something fluffy and extremely pleasant-smelling under his chin. His eyes were resisting to be opened up but the sunlight dark curtains couldn’t obstruct from leaking inside and the overwhelming warmth wrapping his body weren’t helping, though. He managed to open his eyes and tried to make sense of the place. The bedroom…just a moment later he realized his arms had been wrapped around Minhyun and Minhyun’s wrapped around him. Then he recalled everything; the call, hospital, Jinho, nightmare and Minhyun’s patting his back and whispering “he is fine” over and over. He drew back slightly trying not to wake the taller up and looked at his peacefully-sleeping face. Dongho cracked a smile at Minhyun’s cute and pouting expression. He leaned down and smelled that man’s hair. It was smelling just like he had imagined; sweet and refreshing. He placed his chin over Minhyun’s head again and murmured

“Thank you”

_Just a little bit more_ he thought. Yesterday he had remembered why he had married this man, why he had been living with him, why he had been sleeping near him. He should have been more careful and he would from now on ……………but **_just a little bit more _**he thought


	9. The collapse

Dongho turned in the bed and groaned. The sun had come up higher and the curtains had been drawn back, making the room lighter and brighter. It was probably just before noon. Without opening his eyes, Dongho stretched his limbs letting out another groan and yawned. A sweet and refreshing smell hit his nose as soon as his senses started to wake up from the sleep. _Where is it coming from?_ Despite the resistance of his eyelids, Dongho managed to half-open his eyes enough to distinguish the objects around. The first thing he realized was Minhyun standing near the bed and looking at him with a smiley face and wet hair. _Hımmm, the shampoo… the smell…_The shorter male opened his eyes fully and instinctually pulled himself up to sit on the bed. His inner self was thanking God since Minhyun wasn’t in the bed with him now. To wake up cuddling with his not-real-husband would be too embarrassing.

“Minhyun! What are you doing here? You didn’t go to work?” he asked with his sleepy and raspy voice, blinking his eyes trying to get accustomed to the bright light leaking into the room.

“I have talked with my father. It is my free day.” Minhyun said grinning and kept without letting Dongho ask any more questions.

“And get up! We are going somewhere.”

“What?” Dongho asked frowning down and without showing any interest in leaving the comfortable bed. His inner self was wondering where the hell they were going at this hour.

“Get up and wear casual clothes” Minhyun repeated with his _annoying_ grin glued on his face

“Yahh, what is your problem with just staying at home?” the shorter male snapped raising his brows. He really didn’t want to go anywhere. Especially the fucking clubs…

“Life is short. That is my problem” Minhyun argued back.

“But in my short life, I just want to stay at home, lie on the bed and cut my nails”

“No way. Not today. Dongho, please” Minhyun said hoping to convince the shorter male to get out of the bed. Dongho sighed and threw off the sheet on his broad body

“Ok…..I will be ready in 10 minutes.” He said standing up from the bed. Minhyun smiled with the joy of victory and made his way towards the door to let his husband get dressed.

The car stopped in front of the house Dongho knew very well. He turned his face to Minhyun who was sitting at the driver’s seat and asked with a puzzled expression. “Why did we come home?” his brain was trying to guess the reason for their visit and the shorter male suddenly asked with an anguished expression “Something bad happened to Jinho?”

“No,” Minhyun immediately said with the attempt of destroying the panic attack rising in his husband’s face and looked into Dongho’s eyes, smiling.

“You should sometimes visit your family, don’t you? And we can also see how Jinho is doing.” Dongho stared back at his husband’s eyes. Minhyun had heard his screams during the night. Minhyun had seen him crying knelt in front of the hospital room. Minhyun had hugged him and whispered words of comfort while he had been struggling with the nightmares.

“Thank you” the shorter male said without leaving his eyes on Minhyun’s. He wanted the taller male to feel the gratitude he was feeling towards him. For the hug, for the words, for this visit….For everything. Minhyun cleared his throat and turned his eyes away from Dongho’s face.

They opened the door and went out of the car. The taller male looked at the house before stepping forward to follow Dongho and his pulse started to rise drastically again. He was worried because this would be the first visit of him after the fateful dinner. He knew Mrs. Kang had objected this marriage with her all might and this would be the first time they would see each other after the wedding….. He couldn’t guess how Mrs. Kang would react. Minhyun breathed out and started to walk behind his husband. After walking among the small trees and colorful flowers in the garden, Dongho knocked at the wood door which was opened by Kang Minah a few moments later. The first emotion passed on her face was astonishment and then it was replaced with happiness making her smile at Dongho and Minhyun widely.

“Dongho!” she said and hurled herself on Dongho to hug him tightly. The shorter male hugged her back resting his head on his mother’s narrow and slim shoulder. Just a moment later drawing apart from each other, they heard small running steps from the upstairs and then a thin and cheerful voice shouting “Hyungggg!!”

“Jinho, be careful!” Dongho said with haste and with the hope of slowing down his brother. “Jinho-yaah!!!”

Dongho’s whining was cut off with a pair of little arms wrapped around his legs. A genuine smile spread over his face and he leaned down to raise Jinho up, holding him from his armpit.

“Welcome Minhyun! Dongho! Come in” Mrs. Kang said smiling and stepping back from the doorsill to make them enter the house.

They all sat down on the couch. Dongho was still struggling with Jinho clinging to him tightly while his mother and Minhyun were grinning at Dongho’s useless attempts of untangling Jinho from his neck... Mrs. Kang turned her happy glares from his son to Minhyun and said

“It is nice to see you here, Minhyun.”

“I am sorry for not coming earlier” Minhyun said making Mrs. Kang smile genuinely and look at him. The tall man cleared his throat and moved a little unsettlingly on the couch before uttering the words he had wanted to say for a long time.

“And……I- I apologize on behalf of my mother” Dongho raised his head from Jinho’s little arms tugging at him and looked at his husband perplexedly.

“I know, it is too late to apologize but…”

“Minhyun!” He heard Mrs. Kang’s soft voice and felt her warm hand onto his.

“You don’t need to and I don’t want you to apologize for anything. What is done is already done. So let it be. In fact, I only care ….about my son’s happiness and as I can see he is very happy with you. There is nothing more crucial thing than this”

The tall man felt Mrs. Kang’s affectionate touch and soft glares on him. Unintentionally he turned his face towards Dongho who had been already looking at him with a surprised and lightly-blushed face. Their eyes met. At that exact moment, -Minhyun didn’t know what Dongho was thinking but- he just wanted everything to be real. This marriage to be real, this man to be his real husband, this happiness to be genuine and this moment to be forever. But he knew they only had 5 months to stay married, to play this _damn _game. They would divorce and would have to disappoint this woman in 5 months. To her, he would be the one who had caused his son’s unhappiness. A pang of immense guilt was swelling in his chest as the seconds passed feeling the warmth of the hand cupping his and he forced a smile without knowing what to say

“I…..can I use the bathroom?” His mouth said before letting his brain think

“Of course, it is upstairs” Mrs. Kang answered back smiling and letting Minhyun’s hand go. Minhyun stood up from the sofa and made his way towards the stairs hurriedly. The wood under his foot was creaking with his every heavy step.

Every inch of this house was making him feel the warm family atmosphere in his bones. He could even imagine Dongho’s father sitting across the TV and reading his daily newspaper; Mrs. Kang preparing meals for her 3- men family; Jinho clinging to Dongho and playing ridiculous games making both mom and dad look at them grinning with happiness. A heart-warming family.

When he started to ascend the stairs, his eyes caught some frames lined along the wall. He hadn’t realized them before. The first frame -young Kang Minah and young Kang Jisuk looking at each other very loving way that would make everyone laid eyes on this frame feel jealous; the second-Dongho’s small figure-probably about 3 years old- laughing and clapping, the third-teenager Dongho’s tall and slim structure in front of the secondary school’s gate; the fourth- Dongho hugging his parents from their back; and the last- Jinho and Dongho while playing football at the small front garden. A genuine smile spread over the tall man’s face.

When he stepped on the last one, he looked at the three doors across and opened the first one without thinking. As soon as he pushed the handle down to open the door slightly, he caught a glimpse of a single bed in the middle of the room. _It is probably Dongho’s former bedroom_ Minhyun thought and his internal fight had already started. Should he go in or just close the door as if he didn’t open it in the first place? Without giving much thought, the tall male stepped inside and closed the door behind him quietly. He wasn’t doing anything wrong, right? Just wandering around his husband’s room innocently.

A bed in the middle and a nightstand beside it. A wood wardrobe across the bed and brown curtains blocking the sunlight to come in. Some family pictures on the wall harmonizing well with the design of the room. It was really simple and plain but warm and practical. Minhyun looked around and a small smile spread over his face. The tall male felt a desire to tumble on the bed but he fought with it. He made his way towards the wardrobe and opened it without thinking too much. The musky and woody smell he had gotten accustomed in these 4 weeks hit his nose. He inhaled deeply shutting down his eyelids. If Dongho comes after him, it would be really difficult to explain why he entered the room let alone inhaling the smell of his clothes. He closed the wardrobe and turned his back to leave but his limbs couldn’t move. The wall he was facing was full of the papers on which notes and lyrics had been written. Minhyun stepped forward to look at them; every paper had Dongho’s name and signature. And Minhyun realized a bright and colorful paper that had Dongho’s small portrait glued on its right side. He stretched his hand towards it and pulled it slightly not to tear it off from the wall. Minhyun looked at the paper trying to make sense of it and then he read

** _-Kang Dongho; Department of Music, Seoul National University_ **

** _The university student whose personal information stated above suspended his study at the Department of Music, Seoul National University on 25_ ** ** _ th _ ** ** _ May 2015_ **

_So, Dongho was a university student… he had been studying Music…he had been composing…_ Minhyun realized how less he knew about the man he had married….His chest clenched around his heart spreading sadness to his every cell. And then he realized one more thing; yes, he knew nothing about Dongho but he wanted to know this man more; he wanted to know which color and meal he liked most, which team he supported, his hobbies, his favorite t-shirt, and favorite ice cream flavor; he wanted to sing songs with him, to compose together. He wanted to listen to his childhood memories and laugh at ridiculous things.

“He really loves you” his mother said suddenly and made Dongho turn his face from Jinho to his mother. Dongho could feel his cheeks started to burn as his brain started to make sense of the meaning of the words. He gulped and looked down at Jinho who was drawing pictures on the carpet swinging his legs cheerfully among the colorful crayons. 

“The way he had looked at you... Now I am sure he really loves you, Dongho” Dongho started to pat Jinho’s head without looking at his mother and knowing what to say.

“I was just worried because it was a sudden marriage. But you two match really well” she kept, not realizing her son’s discomfort

“Yes, I love him, too.” Dongho said forcing a smile thinking if he didn’t say anything it would be suspicious and awkward. Then they heard Minhyun’s descending steps on the wood.

*

Jonghyun pulled the glass door and entered the café. It hadn’t reached the usual crowdedness yet. There were just a few customers inside. Daniel was preparing orders while Guanlin was cleaning the tables. And there was someone new, tall and handsome like European actors. Jonghyun moved towards the counter Daniel was taking care of the orders behind and called out.

“Daniel!” making the said man turn towards the voice. Daniel’s astonishment turned into happiness when he saw the owner of the voice; Kim Jonghyun

“Jonghyun hyung! Welcome!” he said smiling with his cute bunny teeth. “Thank you” Jonghyun said not moving to sit. “Don’t you have to be at work now?” Daniel asked wondering the reason of Jonghyun’s sudden visit.

“I just wanted to have a talk with you” Daniel’s expression grew more curious; his lips shaped a perfect O, eyes opened widely and brows raised.

“Can we go somewhere else, more private one?” Jonghyun asked looking around. Daniel nodded calling out “Guanlin!” making the tall boy turn towards him.

“Can you replace me? I have to go out a little bit.”

“Of course” the tall boy said stopping to clean the tables and making his way towards the counter. Daniel clenched his hands backward to take off the apron. He could feel angry and disappointed stares on his back while he was walking away with Jonghyun.

“What is the matter?” Hyung!” Daniel asked while walking away from the café. Jonghyun bit his lower lip furiously and sighed “Dongho and Minhyun… I just wanted to talk about them with you” Daniel’s eyes grew wide and said nothing waiting for the older one to go on.

“I know you are surprised. So, I will keep it short and clear; but I want you to be honest with me.” Daniel nodded looking into Jonghyun’s eyes and the older male kept with eyes waiting for honesty.

“Don’t you think their marriage is too sudden?”

“Hyung, what you mean? I really didn’t get it.” Daniel answered the question with a question.

“I mean, I don’t believe their marriage and love. There is something wrong. Nobody knows when they met and when they decided to get married. We both know Dongho, Daniel!! He is not someone who can lie. You know it. If he had met Minhyun before, he would certainly talk about him. Don’t you think it is strange? This sudden marriage? This love? And the strangest part we learn about their love and decision to marry when Jinho had just got a fatal accident.”

“Hyung, I get what you meant now. Yes, at first I thought it was really sudden but I talked with Dongho and he insisted on loving him. He is not a man who can bear someone he doesn’t love let alone marry; so…”

“So… you think I am being paranoid, right?” Daniel looked at Jonghyun, smiling. Jonghyun smiled back and kept

“I really don’t know but something feels wrong” the older sighed

“Anyway, I have to go now. Thank you, Daniel!” Jonghyun turned his back and started to walk. _Whatever it is, Dongho managed to hide it well_ Jonghyun thought.

Daniel opened the glass door and entered the café. Seongwoo stopped cleaning the table and looked at Daniel who was trying hard to hold back a laugh. _How can a human be so cute and manly at the same time?_ Daniel thought and walked towards Guanlin “Thank you.”

“You are welcome” Guanlin said smiling and took the brush to sweep the floor before the number of the customers rose drastically at noon. Daniel sighed and took a glass to prepare an Americano meanwhile Seongwoo was watching him standing like a statue. His brain was asking too many questions to handle. He stepped forward

Daniel could hear Seongwoo’s timid and slow steps approaching him. He was holding a swab at his hand. _Cute _Daniel thought. Seongwoo approached him slowly and sighed furiously before asking

“Who was he?....... Of- of course, it is none of my business but I just wondered if there was something wrong? …….An-anyway” he said stuttering and cursing at himself... _Why did you ask this weird question? Stupid, idiot…You are fucked up Ong Seongwoo... _Seongwoo turned his back to walk away gritting his teeth and holding back not to slap his mouth.

“No, everything is fine and he is ….. a friend of mine.” He heard Daniel’s soft voice and froze at his spot stopping to step further… he didn’t turn his face to the man but couldn’t stop himself, either before asking another silly question

“Boyfriend?” He was afraid of Daniel’s realizing the blush on his cheeks. He gulped furiously and waiting for the answer. A few seconds felt like a few years to him and heard Daniel’s sweet but manly voice again.

“No! Just a friend.” Seongwoo let out a relieved and loud sigh closing his eyes. He was glad for not letting Daniel see his stupid smile gluing on his face. He hadn’t turned his face to Daniel but he could swear he caught a glimpse of Daniel’s grinning.

*

The delicious and mouth-watering smell had been lingering in the air for half an hour. Dongho had been sitting cross-legged on the carpet and watching Jinho drawing something. Kang Minah was setting the table and checking the meal on the stove once in every 2 minutes. The whole scene was very peaceful and had a relaxing effect on Minhyun’s soul. The food smell, the noise of the plates and forks put on the table, the low sound coming from the TV, Jinho’s laying figure among the crayons on the carpet, and Dongho’s smiling face watching his brother…

“How is your head now, Jinho?” Dongho asked patting lightly Jinho’s head.

“Fine.” Jinho said without neither leaving his crayons nor looking at his brother. They heard Mrs. Kang’s voice from the kitchen making Minhyun and Dongho turn their heads towards the woman setting the table.

“You don’t need to worry. Dongho-yahh. It is just a small scratch. You probably don’t remember the times your father had taken you to the hospital on his back.” She cracked a smile.

“We had seen the worst. Your all limbs were broken after falling from the tree and your father couldn’t sleep at least for 5 days” she said with a sad smile on her face showing all emotions old memories had caused to surface. Dongho gave her a gummy smile and said

“I remember the last time. It was really painful.”

“Whenever I turn my back, you would climb. He had even thought of cutting down the tree because of you. And I had begged him for 3 days to convince him not to cut it” she said accusingly making Dongho laugh more loudly.

“Time to eat now, you all. Come here” Dongho stood up from the floor catching Jinho from his small waist and making the youngest laugh. He placed Jinho onto one of the chairs circling the wood table.

Minhyun grinned and sat down on the chair next to his husband’s. After they all placed themselves on the chairs, Dongho raised his head suddenly to look at his little brother with challenging eyes and Jinho mirrored Dongho’s movements. They were staring at each other nonstop. Mrs. Kang was smiling at them meanwhile Minhyun was trying to make sense of the scene. Dongho had a devilish smile on his face; his brows raised, lips thinned. And then suddenly they both attacked the spoon and started to eat quickly at the same time. Kang Minah smiled and called out “Dongho-yah, Jinho-yahh!!!!” they kept eating hungrily pretending they didn’t hear their mother’s complain.

“Yah!!! Eat slow. You both will have a digestion” she said groaning. Minhyun couldn’t hold back his smile anymore. While he was watching the competing brothers, his thoughts kept lingering on Dongho’s genuine smile and his own happiness.

*

Dongho waved at his mother and brother for the last time before Minhyun started the car off. The shorter male sighed with happiness and turned his face to Minhyun.

“Thank you, I really needed that”

“I know.” Minhyun said looking into Dongho’s light brown eyes that became lighter in the sunset for just a moment and then he turned his stares at the road.

“You… you didn’t tell me you had been studying music at the university.”

Dongho turned his face to Minhyun and asked “how… did you?” Then it hit the shorter man. “You entered my bedroom?”

“I was just..”

“Yaahh, Hwang Minhyun!!! I thought you were intelligent enough to differentiate the bedroom and the bathroom”

“Yahh Kang Dongho!!! You know every corner of my bedroom. It is fair enough.”

“You know it is not the same thing.”

“Why?”

Dongho sighed with frustration and decided to stay silent. Taking advantage of Dongho’s silence, Minhyun kept

“Anyway, I would just tell you something…… I think …. You …you should go back to university” Dongho’s eyes grew wide but Minhyun didn’t let him say anything and kept

“Don’t say no immediately; just think about it, hmmm? You have too much free time and why don’t you go to university instead of staying at home with my mom?” Minhyun could feel Dongho’s inner fight with himself but the shorter male looked at Minhyun and nodded saying

“Alright, I will think about it.” 

*

The music was echoing on the walls of the club. Beautiful, tall and slim girls were dancing seductively on the counter while the others were watching their slim curves open-mouthed. The smell and the dim light were making the atmosphere more suffocating. Everybody was clapping and shaking their bodies harmonic with the beat of the songs. The lust had already arisen in the air and the club was full of people who were looking for someone to spend the night in a bed.

Minhyun took a sip of his round liquor glass and placed it onto the counter. He could feel a pair of eyes glaring at him from the very beginning. The tall male turned instinctually towards the man throwing dirty stares towards him. When their eyes met, the man grinned and eyed Minhyun from top to toe clarifying his intent. Minhyun sighed and turned his face away. His eyes were keeping to stop on a certain man; his husband who was looking around with bored expression, Kang Dongho. Anything, anybody except this broad man couldn’t manage to attract his attention for 3 weeks. Minhyun took another sip from his glass and His eyes met with Dongho’s. He didn’t know how many times Dongho caught his glares. The taller male lowered his head to escape from Dongho’s gaze. His hands started to turn the round glass backward and forward unintentionally.

“Hi!” he heard a voice but didn’t turn his face to the owner. He just kept looking at Dongho stealthily.

\--------

Dongho sighed and rubbed his temples. His head was really hurting. Maybe because of the loud music…. Maybe because of the man ogling Minhyun hungrily since the moment they had entered the club. It was really nerve-wracking. He breathed in deeply and tried to focus on the oxygen in his lungs. _Nothing will happen between us. You will go on with your own life and I will go on with mine._ Minhyun’s voice repeated that damn sentence in his head over and over. _This is our deal…..This is our deal._

“Isn’t this man Hwang Minhyun?” a woman in red and short dress whispered to her friend giggling and pointing the place Minhyun sitting with her head.

“Yes, wooww. He is really more handsome alive. But didn’t he get married?” the shorter one asked the other.

“It seems like marriage isn’t enough for him.” she said laughing with her friend and drinking from her glass. Dongho gritted his teeth and clenched his fingers. He raised his head and looked towards the taller man. Their eyes met again. Minhyun turned to his glass and started to push it backward and forward, meanwhile, Dongho watched the grinning man approach Minhyun. Dongho turned his face away from his _fake_ husband and his new encounter.

\------

“I am sorry” Minhyun said to the man leaned on the counter and stood up from the chair to make his way towards the toilet. He opened the door and stepped towards the taps. He looked at the huge mirror reflecting his tall figure turning on the tap and watched the running water listening to its splashing noise for a while. He breathed out and dived his face under the cold water. Maybe it would work… maybe his heart would stop beating fast when his eyes laid on the certain man, maybe his hands would stop sweating too much, maybe his stomach would stop sending cramps all over his body, maybe his breath would stop knotting in his throat.

He washed his face and hold his arms under the current. Rubbing his nape with his cold and wet hands made him shiver from the sudden wetness and coldness. His eyes locked on his reflection leaning towards the mirror and murmured

“What is happening to me? God damn it!” After a few minutes of breathing properly and washing his face too many times, he went out and passed the long hall to make his way towards his husband.

Dongho could feel Minhyun’s stares on him. He approached but the shorter male didn’t turn his face to him and just kept looking at the crowd blankly. “How are you?” the taller one asked hesitantly and that made Dongho turn his face towards Minhyun.

“Guess it!!” Dongho said louder than his intent. Minhyun stepped back from the tone of Dongho’s voice. What made the shorter shout at him like that? Was it anger?

“If-If you want, we can go home now.”

“It is my work. Don’t mind me!” Dongho said and turned his face towards the dancing people again. It was the last sentence coming out of Dongho’s mouth until he fell into the sleep in their bedroom.

Minhyun’s eyes landed on Dongho’s sleeping face beside him and he couldn’t stop looking at that face until the sun had risen.

*

Seongwoo opened his eyes groaning with the loud sound of his phone’s ringtone. _Fuck!! I will certainly keep it switched off while sleeping _he thought and looked at the caller. He slid the green icon and managed to put his ear on the phone scarcely.

After half an hour from the call, the tall man was standing up in front of their club’s door.

“What is the matter?” he asked the brawny man and looked at Minhyun’s figure sitting at a table with a liquor glass in his hand.

“We don’t know. When we came early in the morning, he was waiting at the door. He has been sitting there for 2 hours without speaking. And we wanted to let you know”

“Ok. Thank you” Seongwoo said tapping the man’s shoulder and made his way towards his friend.

“Minhyun! What is happening?” Seongwoo asked and waited for an answer. However, Minhyun neither raised his head from the glass nor speak a word.

“Minhyun!!” Silence again. He hadn’t seen his friend like that for a long time and he didn’t want to see him like that again; like the time when Aron had left him.

“Hwang Minhyun! If you don’t speak to me immediately, I will take you to the hospital.” Seongwoo said with a decisive and sharp voice looking at his friend’s face.

Minhyun let out a breath and said “Seongwoo-yahh” Seongwoo heaved a relieved sigh when he heard Minhyun’s voice and said affectionately

“Yes?” Minhyun raised his head and looked at his friend’s face before uttering the words stuck on his tongue

“I- I FELL IN LOVE…”


	10. It will be over one day

“WHAT???”

“**_I …..fell in love…_**” Minhyun repeated this divine sentence that he had needed too much time to confess even to himself meanwhile Seongwoo ’s brain was trying to make sense of what he had heard of. His friend, Hwang Minhyun; said he had fallen in love with someone after….. after a long time. After he had sworn many times he would never ever open his heart to anyone. After Kwak Aron had left him with a soulless body not speaking, not eating, not smiling, ……not living…

When Seongwoo got rid of the whispers of the bad memories and his five senses returned to his body, he asked anxiously

“With whom??”

Minhyun left his gaze from the glass and looked into Seongwoo’s eyes. And then it hit Seongwoo. _How couldn’t I think about that?_

“Kang Dongho!!” he whispered.

Minhyun nodded and turned his glares at the glass before starting to speak again.

“At first I thought it was just lust. I have even forced a kiss on him, Seongwoo!! Just with the thought of –it will pass.” Seongwoo looked at his friend and stayed silent. _What could he say?_

“Yes, I want to touch him and I want him to touch me but I don’t want anybody else to touch him or to get close. It makes sick and….and angry. I want him to smile……to laugh because of me. My heart starts beating frantically; my hands sweating and my stomach spreading cramps all over my body every fucking time when I look into his eyes. I caught myself so many times while just been staring at him for hours. What is that? Is it love??? Seongwoo!” Minhyun asked

Seongwoo looked at his friend who was really anticipating an answer. He was confused. Should he be happy or sad for his friend? After so many years, he had found someone to stir the forgotten emotions. But if Dongho ………….If he……..Minhyun wouldn’t bear it. He knew. Nevertheless, the tall man sighed and tapped Minhyun’s shoulder with a small smile on his lips.

“Yes, it is love, my friend.”

*

Minhyun rubbed his temples hardly with the hope of decreasing the pain in his skull and threw a glance at the papers on the table. Today was a really busy day. After not getting a wink of sleep, he had gone to the club and sat on the chairs drinking too much liquor with the thought of forgetting about the man he had watched all night. And now, he was in the office reviewing the contracts, reading and signing so many papers. He leaned back to the leather and comfortable chair and breathed out closing his eyes. The same images had been haunting him since the damn morning hours. Sleeping, caressing Jinho’s head, eating, smiling Dongho. Same…. Same….Same…Minhyun sighed and a little bit later he opened his eyes again with the deep sound of the knock on the door. If the secretary brought too many papers to read for a human being again, Minhyun would definitely throw his cellphone on his face. He looked first at the opened door and then the intruder who had a familiar face but absolutely not his secretary. He knew he had seen this face somewhere and then it clicked in his head; it was Kang Daniel, Dongho’s cousin. Minhyun stood up from the chair and walked towards his unexpected guest with a surprised face.

“I am really sorry about that sudden visit.” Daniel said smiling at the man approaching him.

“No! No! you know, I was really waiting for someone to rescue me from the mountains of the papers. I was lost in it.” Minhyun said smiling and gesturing the table covered with white papers. Daniel smiled looking at the table.

“Actually, I am here to talk about tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow??” Minhyun asked wondering what Daniel was talking about.

“Yes…… Dongho’s Birthday” Daniel said looking at Minhyun in disbelief.

“Don’t……….. tell me you forgot it, didn’t you? Right ??”

“N- N- No! No! I didn’t. Of course” Minhyun shuttered. _Dongho’s birthday… What the fuck…???_

“I am planning a surprise birthday party for him. I came here to ask you if you have any other plan like celebrating it alone with him.” _Alone with Dongho… no… not now…. Not the day he had confessed himself that he had fallen in love with his fake husband_

“Yes, I have planned something but I think he will be very glad to be with his friends, too. That is a great idea.”

“Really??Thank you.” Daniel said cheerfully and kept “We will have it in the café. Tomorrow night at 10 p.m”

“Alright. I will take him there safely.” Minhyun said making Daniel smirk at him cutely.

_Dongho will be a lot happier to spend it with his friends rather than spending it with me; his fake husband._

*

“Where are we going now?” Dongho asked while watching the blurring trees and buildings in the yellow street lights. He really hadn’t wanted to go out tonight but Minhyun had insisted and said _“Wear something casual”_

“You will see when we come”. The taller male said grinning but not leaving his gaze from the road. Minhyun had talked with Daniel on the phone, everything and everybody was ready for the party.

“I really sometimes feel like a useless Sherlock Holmes while talking with you.” Dongho said keeping to watch outside. Minhyun just cracked a smile and stayed silent for the rest of the journey.

*

When Minhyun pressed the brake to stop, Dongho looked around.

“Here is…..” _Why did they come here??_

“I know” Minhyun said and met with Dongho’s cute and surprised stares.

“Just go inside” the taller man said to make Dongho move forward. The shorter opened the familiar glass door with a familiar click he had heard for 2 years. It was all dark inside and the only resource of the light was street lambs and buildings’ pale light leaking in.

“Minhyun-ah” Dongho turned his back to look at Minhyun but then he heard a small explosion and everywhere brightened then suddenly. So many familiar faces were looking at him smiling and colorful small confetti papers were flying in the air falling down to his head and clothes. Daniel was holding a cake with many candles on it. Dongho’s brain tried to make sense of the scenes until everybody started to sing “Happy birthday” song altogether. Birthday…. His birthday…He forgot it again….21st July…. While he was cursing at himself for forgetting his own birthday, he felt long arms wrapping around his shoulders and chest. “Hyung...I really really miss you” Guanlin whined.

“Yah… Guanlin!! Let him come here and blow off the candles or we will burn all the café down” Jisung said and made Dongho laugh.

Dongho approached his cousin and blew off the candles.

“You..” Dongho said to Daniel but couldn’t finish his sentence “Stop whining, Dongho and let’s party everyone!” Sungwoon said cheerfully raising his arms to the air. Daniel just smirked. Daehwi and Woojin, the younger students, looked at each other and walked towards the turntable and mixer set up on one of the tables. A few minutes later they were dancing with the girl group songs.

\-----

Woojin and Daehwi were sleeping at the joined chairs hugging each other. The others were sitting on the ground in a circle, playing _a damn_ game; dare or truth. Dongho cursed at Jisung when he insisted on playing that game. He was sure that man was trying to learn about Sungwoon’s past relationships instead of asking him directly. The bottle stopped turning finally and everyone looked at the tips. It was Daniel and Park Jihoon who was a dance student. He smiled and looked at Daniel like he had been waiting for that moment for the whole time.

“I will ask, dare or truth?” Jihoon said with a smile gluing his face. Seongwoo moved unsettlingly meanwhile Daniel thought a little bit evaluating the ridiculous things Jihoon would make him do and said “Truth”

“Do you like girls or boys?” Jisung rolled his eyes and couldn’t stop himself from uttering the words

“Yahh Jihoon-ah!! You should have asked more daring questions like when he had slept with someone last time or what he did. Why do you guys ask these simple questions?”

“I just wanted to learn it, hyung!” Jihoon said eyeing Daniel from head to toe with his too-beautiful and cute face. Seongwoo clenched his teeth while Daniel cleared his throat

“Hmmm! Actually... It doesn’t matter to me. I guess both are fine” he said and just a moment his eyes met with Seongwoo’s. Jihoon smiled at the answer and Daniel twirled the bottle averting his eyes from the tall man. Everyone’s attention slid on the bottle again. And it chose its victims; Ha Sungwoon and Kang Dongho. 

“I will ask Dongho-yahh” Sungwoon said cheerfully and cleared his throat moving to settle himself before asking his question.

“Dare or Truth?” Dongho looked at his friend and saw a devilish smile on it. Minhyun straightened his body beside him. He knew they would ask about Minhyun and he was really bad at lying. They would certainly figure it out so, he shouldn’t leave the safe waters.

“Dare.” Sungwoon’s devilish smile spread all over his face meanwhile Dongho was waiting nervously what he would have to do. 

“Hımmm, then… kiss your husband on the lips… a real one.” Dongho’s face fell with bewilderment and he felt Minhyun’s body tensed beside him. _God_ _damn it. He should have thought that. His damn horny friends._

“Hyung!”

“Just do it Kang Dongho! This is your choice” Sungwoon said with a decisive voice. Dongho sighed and turned his face towards Minhyun sitting beside him nervously. The shorter male cupped his husband’s face looking at his eyes. Minhyun’s heart started to beat frantically against his chest. The only thought in his mind; _it is just a kiss._ Their eyes locked at each other and Dongho leaned forward hastily and their lips met. Closed and short. He pulled back immediately leaving Minhyun with a heart attacking his rib cage. Sungwoon rolled his eyes and whined with disappointment.

“Yaaah Dongho!. This is a kiss??? Really??? It was just a crash of lips. We want a real kiss.”

“Is there someone underage here?” Jisung said looking around scanning the crowd.

“Dongho! It is not even a dare thing. Just kiss your husband …You have done more daring things in your bedroom, right?

“But not in front of many eyes, Hyung!” Dongho countered back. And Minhyun spat out the drink he was drinking and started to cough frantically with the shock of what he had heard. His ears were burning he was sure they were crimson red right now.

“Oohh!! Look at his ears. Oh my god.” Daniel said and laughed with his signature cute smile and stretched a handkerchief to Minhyun.

“Is there something wrong with your marriage? Did you guys fight?” Dongho turned his face towards Sungwoon

“No!we didn’t ” and said shaking his head frantically.

“Then like a real man kiss your husband and don’t say dare in the next round.”

Dongho sighed again after he heard Sungwoon’s decisive and sharp voice. _It is just a kiss. We should do that. It is fake but they don’t know it. soo… _The shorter male turned his body towards the taller once more. Minhyun‘s breath knotted in his throat when Dongho turned his body. His all blood rushed in his face and his pulse started to beat on his lips instead of his veins. Minhyun looked into Dongho’s eyes that were looking like asking for permission for what he was about to do. Minhyun nodded his head very slightly just to make Dongho understand him. The shorter one came closer and leaned forward making Minhyun close his eyes. When Dongho’s lips brushed lightly on his, Minhyun let out the knotting and shaking breath. Minhyun’s hot breath licked Dongho’s face making the shorter close his eyes, too.

That addictive sweet and refreshing smell surrounded him_. It is wrong. It was wrong_ but he realized he wanted to smell it more and more. Dongho leaned forward again to connect their lips properly. It was chaste, closed but thrilling. Minhyun let out another breath opening his mouth very slightly. Dongho pulled back just enough to let Minhyun breathe and taller one thought it was over…the kiss…. But Dongho made a movement Minhyun wasn’t ready for. He leaned again and took Minhyun’s lips into his mouth fully. He sucked Minhyun’s lower lips pulling back enough to attack again winning a quiet and involuntary moan from the taller male. Dongho felt the desire for wrapping his hands around Minhyun’s long neck but fought with it clenching fists on the floor.

Meanwhile, Minhyun couldn't stop himself desiring to touch his husband…Just a moment later, Dongho felt Minhyun’s hands cupping his face with his long fingers and pressed further making Dongho breathe out in Minhyun’s mouth. Minhyun licked Dongho’s upper lip daring him for more. Dongho opened his mouth more and their tongues slid over each other discovering the flavor of them. Both of them felt an electrifying sense surrounding their bodies. Dongho could feel the warmth leaking from Minhyun’s body and his own pulse beating against Minhyun’s chest every time the taller male’s lips slid in Dongho’s mouth sensitively. Dongho gave up and raised his fists from the floor and wrapped both hands around Minhyun’s neck. The latter re-angled his head without stopping to kiss Dongho and their mouths clasped each other perfectly. He felt a silent moan coming out of Dongho in his mouth and wished to hear that blessing sound once more.

His ears were hearing so many sounds; wooing, clapping, smiling but his brain couldn’t make sense any of them. Only Dongho’s tongue in his mouth, Dongho’s lips on his lips, Dongho’s hands on his neck and Dongho’s quiet voice moaning into his mouth. The taller pressed harder to feel…… To feel and to hear more and his lips met Dongho’s eager lips and hands. He was kissing back Minhyun eagerly.

Dongho’s hands were pressing Minhyun’s neck hard to obstruct the taller from pulling back. How their chaste kiss turned into a sloppy, eager and wet one?

Dongho sucked Minhyun’s upper lip biting it lightly once more and pulled back breathing quickly. Minhyun wanted to catch after Dongho’s lips again but he stopped himself. They both were panting hastily. Dongho straightened and turned his body towards the damn bottle not looking at Minhyun’s face. _What did I do? Did I kiss Minhyun and liked it that much?_ He felt his all blood attacked his face and his cheeks and neck started to burn.

“I knew it like I said you had fought before, right? I bet you hadn’t kissed each other for at least a week.” Sungwoon said raising his brows

“I have seen so few things hotter than that kiss.” said another voice grinning.

“Yah, just watching this got me a bon....” Jisung’s head fell the front with the force of a burning slap on his nape. He looked at the shorter male sitting crossed legged near him

“Yahhh!!! It hurt. What are you doing?” Jisung said rubbing his nape with a painful expression.

“We will talk about it at home, Jisung-shi.” Sungwoon said grinning forcedly.

“Anyway, can we just go back the game” Dongho said a little bit louder than his intention making Minhyun turn his face towards him.

“Then twirl the bottle.” Everyone’s focus slid on the bottle again making Dongho and Minhyun, both trying hard not to come to eye to eye with each other, heave a relieved sigh. The moment Dongho put his hand on the bottle, the glass door was opened and attracting all stares at himself, Jonghyun appeared on the doorsill breathing heavily.

“Jonghyun hyung!! You are late.” Guanlin said

“Yeah, I-I am sorry” Jonghyun said stepping towards the crowd sitting in a circle.

_Jonghyun..._ Minhyun raised his face from his lap and looked at the man who was crouching on the floor exactly across Dongho. _Jonghyun… Kim Jonghyun… Dongho’s friend and probably his lover._

** _“And….. I saw a man named Kim Jonghyun in the garden just a moment ago. He didn’t seem well to me. I guess he was your friend.” Minki had said at the wedding. And Minhyun had seen Dongho’s painful expression_ **

** _ “I am really wondering…Is there something special between you and Jonghyun guy Minki mentioned?” _ **

** _“It is not up to you”_ **

**_“Rig- right. It – it is not up to me.” _**Memories attacked Minhyun’s brain meanwhile Jonghyun threw a glance at Dongho who smiled at him before twirling the bottle.

Jonghyun looked at the tip and raised his head from the bottle to look at the person the stopped bottle showed. And he saw a familiar face smirking and looking back at him. He could swear he had seen that face before but when, where and why? Minki would ask and Jonghyun would answer.

“Dare or truth?” Minki asked with a grin on his face.

“Truth” Jonghyun said without thinking.

“Is there anyone who you loved romantically?” Just a moment Jonghyun turned his face towards Dongho who was looking at him surprised and Dongho averted his gaze immediately. _Absolutely_ Minhyun thought. _Dongho knew about Jonghyun’s feelings_.

“What is your problem, guys? Strange questions are lingering in the air.” Jisung said.

“Yes, there is” Jonghyun said directly looking at Minki’s face. And then they heard Daniel’s complaining voice.

“Yaah, why didn’t you tell us before, hyung? Would you tell it when you decided to get married like ….Dongho?” he said with wide eyes and in an angry manner.

“Don’t worry, we can’t get married” Jonghyun said smiling at Daniel.

“Who is it? we really want to learn the person who you love that much but you can’t marry” Minki asked smirking and ignoring Jonghyun’s angry stares among the wooing sounds from the crowd.

“I answered your question, right? That question is for another round. I am sorry.” Minki turned his glares at Dongho’s face who was looking down at his hands clenched in his lap.

_Please Jonghyun-ah, please!_ Dongho thought. He could feel Minki’s and Minhyun’s stares making him feel uncomfortable. He raised his head from his lap and told the first thing he could think.

“Hey guys I will make a coffee for myself. Is there anyone who wants?” he asked standing up from the floor. He had just needed time to breathe.

“I think, no” Daniel said looking around.

“Okay!” he said and made his way towards the kitchen. Jonghyun stood up from the floor abruptly after twirling the bottle. Minhyun looked behind the man and put his hands on the ground to stand up. He wouldn’t certainly let this man stay alone with his husband but he felt a strong hand obstructing him from standing up and turned towards the owner of the hand.

“It is your turn. Minhyun-shi.” Daniel said and gestured the bottle stopped twirling and showing Minhyun and Jihoon. _This damn game_. He thought and kept sitting.

*

Dongho breathed out as soon as he threw himself in the kitchen and rubbed his temples. Maybe a cup of coffee would decrease his pain. 

“Dongho!” he heard Jonghyun’s call out and raised his head from the glass with a surprised expression

“Ahh! Jonghyun-ah! Is it you?” Dongho forced an anxious smile gulping and kept. “Do you need anything?”

“No.” Jonghyun answered back “I just wanted to celebrate your birthday and just wanted to do it right. Happy birthday!”

“Thank you!” Dongho said with a genuine smile on his face and turned his glares at the glass again and started to pour the hot water in the glass

“Are you doing well?” Jonghyun asked after clearing his throat with the attempt of destroying the awkward silence between them.

“Yes, I am.” Dongho said without raising his head from the counter

“But I know you are not. I am your friend Dongho! “ Jonghyun’s words struck Dongho making him look directly into his friend’s eyes.

“You are right. I am not fine because of your meaningful words in front of the crowd and in front of my husband.”

“And… you haven’t told me everything about your husband yet.”

“I told everything that is needed to be told, Jonghyun- ah if you mean the night at the Riverside” Dongho said with a sharp voice and sighing furiously.

“Don’t do that Dongho-yah. I haven’t slept properly since that night. There is something wrong. I know it.”

“Look Jonghyun!

“Please Dongho. Just tell me! I know there is something wrong and I know it is a burden on you. I can see that in your eyes. It doesn’t really make sense. This all marriage thing, and please don’t make me investigate it. Because I won’t let it go and I prefer hearing it from you as a friend of yours.” Jonghyun said with a soft tone. Dongho looked at his friend’s eyes and Jonghyun could see the hesitation in the taller man's eyes. Dongho sighed before starting to speak.

“This ……..all you have seen, all you have heard is just …..” He stopped….

“Just what?” Jonghyun asked to make his friend keep before he changed his mind.

“Just……..Just a game. The marriage, the love is fake. It’s just… a deal” Dongho said in one breath and looking at Jonghyun’s face to see the emotions on his friend’s face

“What!!!!” Jonghyun said frowning and looking back Dongho with wide eyes

“Don’t look at me that way. I had no other option but marry Minhyun.”

W-wh-Why? Why would someone …? Jonghyun shuttered with wonder but Dongho didn’t let Jonghyun finish the sentence

“For Jinho’s hospital bills. I couldn’t pay it and he was about to die. Jonghyun-ahh!!!”

*.

“You should have told us. We could find a way”

“There was no way Jonghyun. I had no time and Jinho had no time, too” Jonghyun stayed silent for a few moments. He couldn’t make sense of the emotions he had felt until now. Should he be happy for himself? Dongho had gotten married but it was just a deal and it would be over in 5 months which meant he had still chance with the man he loved. Or should he be sad for Dongho? He had gotten into a fake marriage for his brother’s life and had to lie about everything to everyone.

“Alright, Even if I can’t approve of your fake marriage, I can understand that at least. But you should know that Dongho! Your mother will be really hurt if she learns about that.”

“I know” Dongho said.

“I will…… ask one more thing.” Jonghyun said hesitatingly and kept looking into Dongho’s eyes.

“This will not last forever. It will end one day. This game, this marriage…” Dongho ’s heart ached with the thought without comprehending the reason fully. _Yes, it will be over one day and Minhyun will have his freedom back._

“What will you do then?”

“I don’t know, Jonghyun-ah! I will think about it when that day comes.”


	11. Friends or Lovers?

“It was fun, right? The party...” Minhyun said laying on his back and looking at the ceiling in the darkness of their bedroom. The room was dimly brightened with the glassy and shattering light of the moon leaking inside from the glass wall and creating natural beauty. Dongho was lying beside him and Minhyun was waiting for a reaction but there was silence. When he started to doubt Dongho had fallen into a fast sleep, he heard the man’s tired voice.

“Yes, Thank you. It was nice to see them” Dongho said after a few moments and he kept “How did you know?..... I forgot it.” smiling slightly.

“Daniel. He came to my office and I tried to convince him I hadn’t forgotten my husband’s birthday for a few hours…. It was really hard, you know..” The taller male said with an amusing voice and he heard Dongho’s light chuckle. Minhyun couldn’t comprehend his current state of mind but two things were lingering and pressing on his thoughts; the kiss and Jonghyun. He was feeling an immense desire to keep talking with Dongho in the bed. There was something sweet and domestic at this moment. But instinctually he knew the kiss wasn’t a subject that they could talk about while lying on the same bed. Maybe it was wrong, but he suddenly asked the most foolish thing towards the darkness hoping that Dongho would think he had drunk too much.

“Can you do me a favor?”

“Hımmm.” He heard Dongho’s murmur. “I want to play a truth game with you…. now” Minhyun felt Dongho’s body move on the bed probably turning towards him and that made his body’s temperature rise drastically.

“I will just ask, and you will just answer.”

Dongho chuckled tiredly and said “That is an interesting game. Why would I just answer? Can I ask questions, too?”

“No, you can’t. That is why it is a favor.” The shorter male hummed, and his mouth uttered a simple “Ok, then.” Minhyun let out a sigh into the darkness.

“Jonghyun…… loves you.” Dongho’s body tensed abruptly. Minhyun knew he was walking on the fragile ice, but he should … to be mentally stable and Minhyun knew Dongho was terribly introvert when it came to the individual matters, but he wanted to believe Dongho would open his heart a little to him. he hoped…“Ahhh……that is not a question…” Dongho answered back smiling and trying to suppress the tension in his chest. But the taller cut him off with a decisive voice as if he didn’t want Dongho to escape from the conversation

“Did you know that?” there was an immense silence tearing the darkness. Minhyun didn’t know whether he wanted to hear the answer. What if he hears something that he would prefer not to hear?

“Yes, I knew……… He confessed to me before the wedding” Dongho whispered, knowing Minhyun would hear him. the shorter man couldn’t comprehend the exact reason why he was doing this with Minhyun. he didn’t have to answer the questions, he could just close the subject up, but he didn’t want to… maybe because of the sour feeling ditching his chest like he had betrayed that man, telling their little secret to Jonghyun; maybe because of the guilt feelings.

Minhyun couldn’t stop the defeated sigh escaping from his mouth and inwardly he gave thanks to god because the moonlight wasn’t bright enough to make Dongho see his expression. And then he asked the question he both wanted to hear the answer and scared to death to hear it.

“Do you love him back?” he whispered with a soft voice trying to make it seem just a friendly wonder. **_Please say No just say No and let me breathe_**.

“I …………. I don’t know how I feel about him.” Dongho said turning his body away from Minhyun and looking at the dark ceiling. “He is my friend, you know like …like best friend. I don’t want to hurt him. I hate seeing him crying and just passing by me like….like a stranger. But I don’t know it is love or…. friendship.” Minhyun’s eyes shut down with the pain clenched around his heart when he didn’t hear simply the word “No” and every word stabbing him as Dongho kept uttering the words. He smiled with the hope of disguising his pain both from Dongho and himself. The pain caused by uncertainty...

“Alright. The last question...” he said trying to keep his voice in a cheerful tone. “If we didn’t get married, would you marry him?”

“Probably yes. I would date him and maybe marry him. we can’t know the future, right? But there is no reason not to give us a chance. I know him, he knows me. He stood by me every time that I struggled. So, I think it will be an injustice to him not to try even if I see him as a friend.”

“Hmmm. Thank you”

“For what?” Dongho asked plainly. “For the conversation and for your honesty. Good night.” Minhyun said with a smile and turned his back to Dongho making the sheet slide over his shoulder. Dongho felt the heaviness of the words he should have told Minhyun. Jonghyun was his best friend. He had the right to know and Seongwoo too knew the true color of their relationship. Just a moment. He hid himself behind his lame excuses and then he decided. _Whatever Minhyun thinks, I should tell him that I told everything to Jonghyun_

“Minhyun!” Dongho called out whispering the name. But there was just silence. so, he stopped without uttering the words hanging on his tongue... But he would tell. Minhyun had right to know there was one more person who knew their secret.

Minhyun heard his name coming out of Dongho’s mouth but he didn’t make any noises pretending to fall into sleep in safe darkness. Let Dongho think this as a friendly conversation. Let Dongho not know the pain he felt, let Dongho not know the love flooding from his heart.

Dongho opened his eyes with the sun leaking from the glass wall into the room with its all force and brightness. The first thing he realized Minhyun wasn’t in the bed with him. Probably working his ass off. When his eyes got accustomed to the bright light, he straightened himself up groaning and turning his head towards the clock on the nightstand just to look at the time. It was 10 a.m. and then he noticed a folded white paper, he was sure which wasn’t there last night. He took it and read the neat handwriting with an O shaped mouth.

** _I may not be able to come home tonight. Don’t wait for me. I must straighten some affairs related to our club. You know decorations, workers… it may last long._ **

** _Minhyun_ **

Dongho realized a smile spread over his face after reading it. Why he was smiling like an idiot reading that simple paper over and over? Maybe it was because of the paper itself, maybe it was because of Minhyun’s giving reasons for not coming home like they were a real married couple, maybe because of a simple word “our”.

\--------------------------

His head was really hurting. Jonghyun rubbed his temples with the hope of subsiding the ache in his skull spreading over his eyes while walking towards to the shop. Thankfully, his shift wasn’t early in the morning since his body was aching too much to be up with the crows, but his heart was very lighted after the last night. His sleep was short but very peaceful. Like a heavy and excruciating burden was lifted from his soul and heart. Everything seemed more vibrant to his eyes. Even his mother had asked the reason why he was so cheerful today. Of course, he knew the reason; Dongho…

When he reached the shop, he pushed the door and Woojin, his part-time coworker welcomed him with a warm smile.

“Welcome, Hyung!...... You have a guest and I have to go now.” he said pointing the said guest behind him with his head. Jonghyun’s eyes slid from Woojin’s face to the figure who was standing behind Woojin. And his body tensed abruptly when his eyes landed on the figure and his brain made sense of who it was.

“My classes are about to start, Hyung! I am going. See you tomorrow.” Woojin said and waved his hand walking hastily towards the door.

“Oh. Take care!” Jonghyun murmured without leaving his gaze from his guest; Hwang Minhyun. After the closing of the door echoed in the shop, Minhyun started to trudge towards the shorter male stretching his hand.

“We haven’t personally been introduced, right?” Minhyun said and Jonghyun took and shook the stretched hand.

“Yes, I am Kim Jonghyun.”

“Hwang Minhyun” Minhyun said formally.

“I guess you are wondering the reason why I came here.”

“Honestly ……….yes.” Jonghyun said calmly looking at the taller male.

“Alright, let’s get into the point then to satisfy your curiosity.” Minhyun sighed and kept

“Tell me if I am wrong. Last night, I felt something strange about your _friendly_ feelings towards Dongho. I mean … I sensed some implications and I didn’t really like them.” Jonghyun felt an invisible knife ditching his guts._ Did Hwang Minhyun come here to warn him? What did it mean? Why would he? Their marriage was fake and Minhyun shouldn’t have been interested in Dongho’s life. _His brain screamed him the only logical reason why Hwang Minhyun was standing across him. …. **_He loves Dongho._** Jonghyun’s eyes went wide. **_Certainly, he loves Dongho or he wouldn’t be here._**

“Let’s be clear. You love Dongho, right? Maybe I should remind you. He is married to me. Stay away from him” Minhyun said like he wanted to confirm Jonghyun’s thoughts when the shorter kept his silence. Jonghyun clenched his fists with the invisible force of the words coming out of the taller male’s mouth. Who was this man to say him to stay away from Dongho?? _No, not again. He will not lose Dongho to this man again. He will not stay silent about his feelings. He will not wait this time._

Jonghyun raised his head up and looked into directly Minhyun’s eyes uttering the words calmly despite the wrath ditching his insides...

“If you want me to stay away from him, you should have had a **_real_** marriage with him, not a **_fake _**one.” Minhyun’s expression changed drastically. His stomach sent a cramp all over his body. _How did he….???_

“Ahhh!! I shouldn’t have known that right?....... He is my friend. What did you expect?”

_Dongho… Dongho told him_…Minhyun felt oddly betrayed. The pain and shock attacked his body making his limbs and brain lose the ability to react. He kept silent like his mouth couldn’t produce any sound and Jonghyun kept.

“I am just standing that ridiculous game for the sake of him and yes, I love him.”

Ridiculous game… Game….That word pierced his chest making him clench his teeth and without realizing the words were poured out of his mouth.

“Yes, …….it was a ridiculous game.” The taller man said between his teeth clenched tightly and kept “But it is not right now and as you guess……. I love him, too.” He said and made his way towards the exit. When the sun placed its lights on Minhyun’s skin, he breathed in with the hope of feeling the oxygen in the air. Disappointment, anger, and sadness…he was feeling so many emotions and didn’t know which one was making him breathless. He walked towards his car to make his way home. He should ask because he needed answers.

*

Dongho heard the quick steps approaching him and raised his head from the soil he had been digging for a small plant he had taken from his mother. _Minhyun?_ The taller male should have been at the club right now. What was he doing here? And then Dongho noticed something wrong with the tall male. Something he couldn’t explain with the words, but he knew there was something wrong and unusual.

“What are you doing at home at this hour? I thought you would be …..” Dongho said worriedly to see Minhyun standing in front of him with icy cold stares.

“You….told everything to Jonghyun.” Minhyun said directly when he approached Dongho enough for him to hear it. the shorter male felt excruciating guilt in his guts as soon as his brain made sense of the meaning of the words. He left the small shovel to the ground and stood up slowly. _That was it?_

“How did you...? You have talked with Jonghyun?” he asked not knowing how to react. Of course, he should have said Minhyun that but…

“Don’t change the subject now.” Minhyun retorted back loudly.

“I don’t have such an intent to.” He said softly.

“Are you aware of what you have done? Someone knows everything. _Every fucking thing.”_ Minhyun shouted as loud as possible against Dongho’s soft tone. _Yes, Dongho told him_ and that thought was firing the anger he felt in his every cell.

“Seongwoo knows, too.” The shorter shouted back unintentionally as a defense for Minhyun’s loud voice. _What are you doing, idiot? Just apologize_.

“He is my friend!!!!” Minhyun said between his clenched teeth.

“And that means we can tell it to our friends, right?”

“He is not your friend. He is your lover!!! God damn it!!! He loves you. Can’t you differentiate that? He will use it against us.” _No_ Dongho thought. _I can trust Jonghyun even with my life. He is not someone like that._

“No!!! he will not. I trust him!!”

“But I don’t!!!…. if it means anything to you.” Minhyun whispered the last words breathing heavily and made his way towards the gate turning his back to Dongho.

\------------------

Minhyun slashed down the glass in one shot making his nerves send electrifying sense all over his body. There was so much noise around; the annoying sound of a drill creating holes on the walls, the craftsman’s speaking, the unnerving squeak of moving wares all around and Seongwoo’s commanding voice

He was really amazed at how his mind was managing to get back to Dongho among so much noise drumming into his nerves. As the empty glasses increased on the bar stand, his brain was screaming him that he had overreacted. Of course, Dongho shouldn’t have told anything, but inwardly he knew it wasn’t about Dongho’s confessing their secret to a friend, it was about Dongho’s confessing it to Jonghyun, who was in love with Dongho. And he knew that ıf Dongho told it to Daniel, he wouldn’t feel that disappointed and betrayed. But did he have right to feel that way? Probably no. Jonghyun loved Dongho and Dongho was ready to give him a chance. So, he would naturally feel the desire to explain the true color of their marriage. Their _damn fake_ marriage... Their main problem…

His thoughts were disturbed with a slight touch on his shoulder. He raised his head to look at the owner of the hand still lingering on his body. Minhyun eyes grew wide when they landed on the face looking down at him with a grinning expression. “This is very rude of you. Hwang Minhyun. what is this face? Long time no see” Seojun said drawing back his hand from Minhyun’s shoulder. _Firstly, Jonghyun, then Dongho and now Seojun… What a great day _Minhyun thought.

“Can you please stop looking at me like questioning the reason for the sudden visit? Birds told me you are opening a new place. And I guess they weren’t wrong, right?” Said Seojun looking directly into Minhyun’s eyes. “And this place is very nice” he said looking around.

“Thank you” Minhyun said simply turning his glares at the glass in his hands again. He didn’t have any strength for another fight.

“Welcome, Kim Seojun-shi” they heard Seongwoo’s voice and Seojun turned his body towards the tall man.

“Ooohh, Seongwoo, too came. I am really lucky to see you together here because I have an interesting story to tell you both”

“As you see, we _both_ don’t have time for your games, Seojun-ah” Seongwoo snapped back with a sharp tone.

“Don’t be like that, Seongwoo-yah. We were friends, you forgot it? Just let me share a story with you. I can guarantee you will like it.” Seongwoo turned his glares at Minhyun who was looking at their unwanted guest with a wondrous face.

“It is about a well-known and wealthy CEO. One day our CEO’s father wanted him to marry as soon as possible. But he didn’t and somehow, he had managed to delay the marriage for 3 years without thinking anybody’s feelings. One day his father’s patience ran out and threatened him with disinheritance if he didn’t marry. So, he started to think ways of getting rid of this marriage. But how? He didn’t want to be disinherited. And he had suddenly a perfect idea. He would find a man who needed money and propose him to get into a fake marriage. So, he would do everything he wanted, and the man would get his money. They would deceive everyone and after a while, they would suddenly understand their marriage wasn’t working and divorce. And his father would give freedom to his son who was already devastated, not to break his heart anymore. He would get what he wanted; freedom, wealth, heritage. How is it?”

“Hahaha, it is ridiculous. Who will believe that?” Seongwoo said with an anxious smile.

“I believed, Seongwoo-yah”

“This is ….”

“Seongwoo! Stop please! No need to deny. This game is already over.” Minhyun said slapping the glass on the stand. **_Since the moment I fell in love with Dongho._**

“Oh no!! It doesn’t have to be over. Really. I won’t tell anybody about that…… I really loved you Minhyun. And if we got married, it would not be an arranged marriage to me. And now I don’t have an intent to revenge on you. Because I can’t hurt you even if you hurt me deeply…….. You can’t understand the reason, right? Because you don’t know it doesn’t matter how many times you got rejected but love keeps blossoming like a flower again and again just to be plucked mercilessly.”

“You could tell me you didn’t love me. To my face; to me, not to your father. I loved you Minhyun since first sight, since the first moment my eyes landed on you”

Seo Jun said whispering the words and turned his back to leave but he stopped moving and said loudly to be sure Minhyun heard him.

“Aahhh, one more thing” he said turning his face to Minhyun again. “I just want to know whether you are really that disgusting.” Minhyun couldn’t make sense of the words. He was already surprised to hear Seojun’s confession. He had thought Seojun was just stubborn; he didn’t think the possibility of the existence of Seojun’s love for him. ….Even once...

“Did you know that man, Kang Dongho accepted your fake marriage proposal to save his brother from the deathbed?” Minhyun's heart and his breath stopped just a moment creating a knot in his throat as soon as his brain ascribe meaning to the words coming out of Seojun’s mouth.

“What!!”

“Ahh, you don’t know… let me tell you then. The day we would get engaged, his brother got into a fatal car accident and had to get over two surgeries to live. You know the hospital rules, right? And Dongho had to find too much money to save his brother……” Minhyun couldn’t hear anything……. _Jinho……. Of_ course, he knew Dongho needed money at that time, but he didn’t know the exact reason…. until now. His ears had started to buzz, and eyes started to see memories.

** **

** _“I just need money. Now… As soon as possible.” Dongho said without looking at Minhyun._ **

** _“I am just wondering. What changed in a few hours? As much as I remember you are disgusted by the people like me who count on their bank accounts” Minhyun said turning his gaze at Dongho with an answer-expecting face. Meanwhile, Dongho just gritted his teeth and stayed silent watching the blurring trees and buildings._ **

** **

** _The sun was about to rise. Minhyun was trying to make sense of the place Dongho wanted to come. He made his way towards the direction Dongho went. Then he saw him; Dongho speaking and sobbing in front of a grave in a forest_ **

** _“I am sorry for not being able to protect Jinho”_ **

** **

** _The phone slid down and crushed at the floor making Minhyun and Seongwoo stop talking and turn heads towards Dongho. Minhyun stood up from the sofa and made his way towards his husband with haste. There was something wrong. Something bad, really bad. The taller man captured Dongho by his shoulders and called out with a soft voice “Dongho!!” there was not any slight reaction. He stepped forward to look at Dongho’s blank face._ **

** _“Ji-Jinho…Jinho!!” was the only thing Dongho’s mouth uttered. Minhyun cupped Dongho’s face and said_ **

** _ “Dongho! Look at me, please”_ **

** **

** _ Minhyun felt Dongho’s head falling onto his shoulder and silent tears soaking his shirt in front of the room 1248._ **

** **

** _“No, Jinho!!!!!” Minhyun heard Dongho’s shouting and breathing heavily._ **

** _“Dongho!” Minhyun touched at Dongho’s arm softly to make him wake up from another nightmare he had had all night long. Dongho opened his eyes panting and sweating heavily._ **

** _“Sssshhh... it is over” Minhyun said turning his body to Dongho and drew himself closer to his husband wrapping his arms around the man and started to pat his back._ **

** **

He hid his face behind his hands trying to breathe. **_No way. NO WAY…_**

**_“_**Glad to know you are not that disgusting.” Seo Jun said and disappeared among the people with slow steps.

“I-I just thought…. he had changed his mind…..I just thought…” Seongwoo wrapped his arms around Minhyun’s back rubbing up and down with the hope of calming down his friend.

** _Engagement day…. In a café …. Seongwoo was staring at the man with an extremely handsome face and a cute bunny smile; Daniel … he said to the person on the phone “Dongho, are you trying to make me turn green with envy?” with a grin on his face. Just a moment later, Daniel’s beautiful grin faded away and the glass in his hands fell to the well-cleaned white floor scattering all around and leaving dark coffee stains and pieces of glass behind._ **

** _ “Dongho! What happened? Dongho!!” Daniel spoke with a loud voice. He stood aghast without uttering any word for 30 seconds but then he shouted at the phone “Listen to me. Where are you now? Tell me where you are now, Dongho!!!” pointing out every word._ **

** _“I am coming” he clasped his hands behind to take off the apron quickly and he threw it onto the counter running out of the glass door._ **

Seongwoo gritted his teeth making sense of a far memory now.

“No wonder he hated me so much.” Minhyun murmured trying to suppress his tears. “I made him marry me in exchange for his brother’s life.”

“You didn’t know! Stop accusing yourself, please” Seongwoo said

“That doesn’t change the fact that he will just see me as a man he got married for his brother’s life. He will never love me back, Seongwoo.”

*

Dongho hadn’t seen Minhyun since their argument. Minhyun can’t be still angry with him, right? Yes, he can. Dongho had texted and called him too many times since yesterday… but Minhyun hadn’t gotten back to him leaving all calls and messages not-responded. He hadn’t come home last night as he had written on the note and now he was sitting on the chair located at the poolside in his unchanged suit and staring at something blankly. The sun was about to set.

Dongho looked at the Minhyun’s figure from the glass wall in their bedroom. Maybe he should apologize and talk about Jonghyun’s call today. He wouldn’t cancel it like the last time. Dongho sighed and went out of the room and making his way towards the garden.

Minhyun seemed like he didn’t notice Dongho’s arrival who sat down on the large and cream-colored chair beside the one Minhyun sat.

“Welcome back” there was just silence around.

“Today…. Jonghyun called…” Dongho said softly and Minhyun turned his glares at Dongho looking into his eyes. The taller realized how he missed his husband and fought with his body to turn his glares away from the man.

“Did he?” Minhyun said calmly after turning his head away.

“He said he wanted to meet with me and talk about something and I just thought I should ask to …..”

Minhyun cut him off not letting the shorter complete his sentence.

“It is fine, you can go. We are not really married. You are living your own and I am living my own life, right?” Minhyun said without looking at Dongho’s face. _Don’t turn your head. Don’t look at him. _He inwardly warned himself. He knew if he looked at that man once more, he wouldn’t stay loyal to his decision to keep the distance from Dongho for his own sake. For his heart…. For his soul. He wouldn’t get himself into a war he had lost from the beginning. He wouldn’t deceive himself with the possibility of Dongho’s loving him back. He had hope until……until Seojun came and reveal the ugly truth behind Dongho’s acceptance of his _damn_ proposal. He knew Dongho would die for the sake of his brother let alone a fake marriage.

“Yes.” He heard Dongho’s voice.

“I think it will be better if we don’t speak or see each other except for obligatory cases.”

“What!!........... You are still angry with me? He is my friend. Minhyun. I couldn’t lie to him. I am sorry, really sorry but…”

“I am not angry. I was but I am not now. So, stop apologizing.”

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No, you didn’t.”

“What is it then? You are behaving strangely for 2 days. You don’t even look at my face. Tell me.” Minhyun stayed silent and Dongho kept with the first thought his mind screamed to him.

“Is it kiss? You are angry because of the kiss? This is why you are trying to create distance from me? I am sorry Minhyun! I am sorry for the kiss, too. But……you know it was necessary.” He could feel the heat spreading from his cheeks. It was the first time he had mentioned the kiss. _Maybe Minhyun was uncomfortable with the closeness they shared._

“No! it is not about ………..the kiss.” Minhyun said calmly but inwardly surprised that Dongho mentioned about it clearly.

“What the fuck is it then? Explain the reason why you are taking away the only person that I can talk to in this fucking huge estate. But you know why am I so angry right now? Because I just thought we had managed to be friends but not strangers that just talk with each other in obligatory cases.”

“We are not friends Dongho!.” **_Because I am in love with you. Stupid!!! I fell in love with you. Too late to be friends._**

“I can see that…..clearly now.” Minhyun really tried hard to ignore the disappointment flowing from Dongho’s voice. It was stabbing his chest, but he should bear.

“Go and meet with Jonghyun. It is fine for me. He already knows everything so, just be careful not to be seen.” Minhyun said and stood up from the chair making his way towards the estate.

Dongho looked behind the tall man’s structure. **_What did I expect?_** “**_No, you can’t_**.” He realized a pain clenching around his chest. Maybe he expected that. Maybe he thought they were more than fake marriage partners, but they weren’t even friends, to begin with….


	12. Marry me

_We aren’t friends….We can’t be_. Minhyun repeated these sentences over and over with his every step distancing him from Dongho. Just a moment……Just a fucking moment, he stopped stepping forward. His brain was about to go insane and his body was physically aching. The thoughts pressing his soul…..What if he ran back to Dongho and tell him about the love ditching his chest and beg the shorter not to meet with Jonghyun and to turn that marriage into a real one…….He cracked a painful smile. _This is your curse Hwang Minhyun!!_ _For undervaluing the marriage and love turning them into game…..For deceiving your parents….. For deceiving yourself…_

He stepped forward ignoring his thoughts and trying to forget the disappointed expression on Dongho’s face and hurt tone in his voice. He stepped forward trying to convince himself not to run back to the shorter.

Dongho kept sitting on the chair watching the glimmering water-diamonds on the pool’s surface created by the orange sunset. He couldn’t understand the reason of the hurt he felt in his deepest parts. He couldn’t understand why Minhyun turned into a stone towards him. Why? Why? It hurt… Yes, it was wrong of him to tell Jonghyun about their marriage but it wasn’t a big deal as long as Jonghyun didn’t reveal it to anyone and he knew Jonghyun wouldn’t do anything that would hurt him. There should be something else that made Minhyun so…something else….

“Sir, Mr. Hwang wanted me to inform you. It is dinner time and they are waiting for you at the hall.” Dongho’s thoughts got disturbed with a soft and thin voice of an old woman. He hadn’t realized how much time he had been sitting there and looked around. The sun was already set and the darkness had already been covering the sky.

……………………….

The dinner table was deadly silent except the sounds of the knives and forks cutting the steak on the plates and soft steps around the long table. Mr. Hwang raised his head from his plate and looked around

“Dongho!! Minhyun!” he called out making the said men raise their heads towards the old man with confusion.

“Did you……. fight?” He said a little bit hesitatingly but feeling a certain bad mood around the table, around his son.

“No!! no!” Minhyun said extremely-defensively causing his father’s suspicion to grow more.

“Then ..What should I accuse for both of your sullen faces??? There is something wrong with the place ?” Minhyun heaved with relaxation inwardly as he wouldn’t have to make creative excuses to persuade his father about the well-doings of his marriage.

“Yes, actually. I have something in my mind but it is not something that I can’t deal with. Don’t worry.” He lied. Everyone’s attention on the father and son’s small talk got disturbed with the sound of Dongho’s phone. “Excuse me!” he said and stood up from the table bowing slightly.

“Mom! …………What?............. Why?” Minhyun heard Dongho’s hiddenly-worried voice and could only see Dongho’s back. A few moments later, Dongho started to trudge towards the table and

“She wants to talk with you” said with anxious face stretching the phone towards the taller male. Their eyes locked just a moment probably thinking the same thing. Minhyun could feel Dongho’s anxiety and stress starting to emerge from his body.

“Mrs. Kang! good evening!” Minhyun said nervously feeling the shorter was in all ears despite his useless attempts to seem laid-back. Meanwhile, Dongho was trying to decrease the drum of his beat wondering why his mother called suddenly let alone she wanted to talk with Minhyun. A few moments that felt like years later, Dongho heard Minhyun’s murmur “Ok. We will come. Good night.” the shorter turned his head towards the taller, stopping to play with the food on his plate anxiously and waited for Minhyun to start speaking

“She invited us for breakfast tomorrow morning.” The shorter inwardly sighed with relief. All terrifying possibilities had passed from his mind while waiting for the end of the conversation vanished with that sigh. Minhyun turned his head to his father and Mr. Hwang nodded simply while Minhyun cursing at his fate.

………………..

“I can make excuses like you had an important meeting. You don’t need to come.” Dongho said without looking at Minhyun standing in the middle of their bedroom.

“No!!!No need. One lie is enough for her and I don’t want to add another one.” Minhyun said and left the room not coming back all night.

*

The ride to Kang’s house was deadly silent. The unnerving silence was being disturbed by whizzing sounds of the cars passing by them, the strong roar of the buses and an ambulance’s siren coming from far away.

**_‘It will be better if we don’t speak or see each other except for obligatory cases.’ _**This sentence was still hanging between them so, neither Dongho nor Minhyun uttered a word for half an hour. When the car stopped on the familiar earth path, the shorter opened the door without saying anything and made his way towards the home, his home. It was really early in the morning. He breathed out listening to the peaceful sounds surrounding his home ignoring the tremble caused by morning chill. The sun was making the flowers turn their crowns towards the sky and light warm breeze was making the leaves of the huge tree rustle.

Dongho waited for Minhyun before knocking at the wooden door. When he felt the existence of the taller near him, he raised his hand.

At the entrance of the door, they were greeted by smiling-warmly Mrs. Kang who was in her kitchen apron and pouting Jinho rubbing his sleepy eyes harshly. Dongho closed his eyes for a moment and breathed in the smell filling the whole house. “Woo!it smells very nice.” Mrs. Kang chuckled warmly and Dongho turned towards his husband “Isn’t it, Minhyun-ah??” he asked looking into the taller male’s eyes, smiling widely.

_Their damn fake game…._He wouldn’t be that man’s real husband, he would not be his lover, either and Minhyun destroyed the chance of being friends with that man in his own hands yesterday. He tried to press the sigh forcing his mouth to come out and ignore the pain in his chest. He just said looking back into Dongho’s eyes. “Yes, it smells really nice” before stepping towards the hall.

……………….

Mrs. Hwang’s eyes slid onto her son “ You have started your show again.”

“Did you like it?” Minki said with a grin on his face meanwhile Mrs. Hwang scowled at her son holding onto her silence. “I am glad, then” Minki said filling his mouth with the food. “What will I do with you?” she said throwing the knife and fork on her plate harshly drawing her husband’s attention on her.

“It is easy! You know it best; just send me away again.”

“You….. wanted to study abroad!”

“I don’t remember a deal about you getting rid of me completely. I wanted to study abroad not to stay there forever never returning back to my country.”

“Minki!” Mr. Hwang called out trying to disturb his son’s sudden burst.

“You are that much ashamed of me? You didn’t even let me know Minhyun’s marriage. He is my brother you know. That I learned it from a fucking website!!!!!” Minki said louder towards his mother ignoring his father’s involvement.

“It is not like that, son.” Mr. Hwang said softly again trying to soothe the anger emerging from his little son and kept “Minhyun’s marriage was too sudden”

“And you are telling me it is too sudden to inform me about my brother’s marriage? The time was long enough for thousands of articles written about it on hundreds of websites...Isn’t it? Let alone mom….. Dad!!! what about you? ……….You two turned into one as the time had passed. But unfortunately, it is not you…. Dad!”

Mr. Hwang sighed with frustration and turned his head towards his wife sitting across the long table and put the knife and fork down a little bit loud creating a disturbing sound.

“You can be proud of yourself, Seo Eun-ah! Look at your _lovely_ family now.” He said and stood up from the table leaving the hall with hurried steps.

Minki grinned without looking at his father’s behind meanwhile Mrs. Hwang sighed taking the glass and grabbing it hard between her long and thin fingers.

“Stop acting like a belittled son of the family. Minki-yah! Your dad and Minhyun don’t know why you went abroad. But you…. and…… I know it very well, right my son?”

…………….

“Ahhh! I am feeling like I will die now!!” Dongho groaned still sitting on the chair in the kitchen.

“Serves you right!! You should have eaten slowly. I said you would have indigestion. Once ..just once listen to your mom!!” Mrs. Kang said snappishly taking away the plates on the table.

“This is because of you, mom! You shouldn’t have cooked so many delicious meals, then” the older woman grinned and “It is because I want my chubby Dongho back. Look at yourself. You have turned into muscle stack. You are not working out, right?”

“No, it is actually in my genetics” Dongho said teasingly thinning his lips not to smile and making his mother burst into laughter.

“Yaahh Kang Dongho! A man should have modesty. You are really……..not cute”

“Mom! I am too old to be cute. I should be cool, right?”

“Ok!Ok! Just be cool! Anyway, thanks to God, I have Jinho” their eyes slid on Jinho sitting in front of the TV on the carpet and watching his favorite cartoon with his all attention.

“Jinho-yah! You shouldn’t watch TV so near, it will deteriorate your sight.” Dongho said and stood up from the table hurriedly heading towards the hall. He grabbed his brother from his armpits and pulled the small body farther from TV winning a grumble from his little brother.

After watching Dongho and Jinho’s push and pull for a few minutes with a smile on his face, Minhyun stood up from the chair taking the other plates from the table and placed them into the sink.

“Minhyun-ah!! Do you want to see his childhood photos? He was really adorable” Mrs. Kang asked silently while she was adding another plate into the sink. Minhyun just nodded almost letting himself believe in the reality of that moment, of their marriage. And then he realized it wasn’t the reality. Dongho and he would return to their silence, their game again when they went out of this house’s door. He didn’t want that. He hated that with his all existence. His eyes unknowingly found the man sitting on the carpet and patting the small head in front of the TV. He didn’t know how he would get rid of the feeling piercing him.

Mrs. Kang returned to the hall with two thick encyclopedia-like photo albums. Minhyun had already placed himself on the sofa watching the cartoon with the brothers when the old woman sat beside the taller and opened the blue one. Dongho looked back just a moment and saw what his mother holding in her thin hands.

“Mom!” he reacted a little bit louder than intended.

“What! I just wanted to show Minhyun how _“cool”_ my son was” Mrs. Kang retorted back with a devilish and teasing smile on her lips. Minhyun couldn’t back his laughter anymore when he saw Dongho’s desperate expression looking at his mother like begging.

“Is it really that funny, Hwang Minhyun?”

“ Yes, it is. “Minhyun answered back immediately still smiling with his fox-like eyes disappearing between his brows and cheekbones and heard Mrs. Kang’s not-so-slight-chuckle. Dongho turned towards his brother again, with a blushed face since he knew what the taller male would see in these albums.

“You know, back then it was really hard to find a device to take photos. So when we had, it had already turned out like that.” She gestured the huge photo albums in her hands and tabbed on the first picture saying

“Look at them! They are really my treasure!”

……………..

“Mom! What is this? It smells really good” they heard Dongho’s voice coming out of the kitchen and humming in delight.

“Ahh! It is a hot pot.” Mrs. Kang spoke loudly towards the kitchen

“Ohhhh!! You are the best!! Really!!” Dongho said louder to make his mother hear it. Minhyun smiled at Mrs. Kang’s snappish face before looking at his watch. It was 8 p.m. which meant they had been eating, talking, playing at this small house for nearly 12 hours and to his surprise, he couldn’t realize how much time they spent here. Time flew naturally here...

“It has been really late. Thanks for everything. For photos, too” Minhyun said letting out a chuckle

“I don’t think he will want to leave before tasting the hot-pot” she said with a smile and then their conversation stopped with a loud metal thudding noise and a painful groan coming out of the kitchen. Minhyun instinctually jumped on his feet. It was Dongho. “Dongho!” he said turning his glares towards the kitchen where was filled with shaking and painful gasps. His legs started to move hurriedly and he ran towards the source of the voice. Just a moment his body stopped reacting and stayed frozenly-still at the doorsill, with the sight of his husband lying on the floor in pain.

When his brain commended his limbs to awaken, he ran and kneeled down near the shorter “Dongho!” The floor was wet and hot while the steam was rising up into the air. The pot was completely empty on the soaked surface. He shoved the strands of Dongho’s hair back to see the expression on his face and his gazes slid below catching a glance of extremely irritated red skin from the slightly-curled-upward shirt. O_h my fucking god!!_ Minhyun cursed out and immediately grabbed the edges of the soaked shirt. Dongho hissed and whined with the pain caused by the fire burning his skin when the taller moved the fabric upwards.

“Hsssh….I am sorry…. I am really sorry but we have to remove that.”

“Dongho!!!” Mrs. Kang said frozen at the entrance of the kitchen with the sight of her son in pain on the floor. When her brain made sense of the scene, she shouted towards the hall “Jinho-yahh!!! Don’t approach the kitchen. Ok?” 

“Minhyun ah!” She called out anxiously touching his shoulder to draw the taller’s attention on herself.

“Can you take him to the bathroom and shove him under the cold water? I will try to find something to soothe the burn.” She said before leaving the kitchen in a haste. Minhyun stopped tugging at the edges of the shirt and immediately grabbed Dongho’s waist wrapping his arm around tightly with the other supporting the broader man’s shoulders. Dongho whined with the burn on his skin all over his chest, getting worse with every small movement. It felt like the fire eating his skin.

As soon as the taller pulled Dongho into the bathroom, still dripping hot water from the end of the fabric; he grabbed Dongho’s shirt but the strong hand stopped him.

“I …..I can do it myself, yo… you don’t have to!” Dongho rasped his voice still shaking with the pain.

“Just once don’t be stubborn and let me help you.” Minhyun retorted back with frustration still not leaving the shirt and looking into directly the shorter’s eyes. Dongho’s brain was being filled with the burning sensation more by every moment and he didn’t have the strength to protest anymore. He raised his arms up slightly to make Minhyun take off the wet fabric over his head.

“Dongho!! We need to go to the hospital. It looks really bad” the taller said gasping after seeing the extremely red skin covering Dongho’s all chest from his neck to his tummy.

“No!!! I …I….do...don't want to!!”

“Dongho!!...”

“I …I don’t want to. I …I can d..deal with it.” Minhyun gritted his teeth. _Stubborn idiot…._ He immediately opened the tap and after being sure the water was cold, he hurriedly pulled Dongho under running cold water making the shorter sigh with relaxation provided by the coldness soothing the burn. Minhyun silently ran the flow of water across Dongho’s chest and watched the shorter grab the edge of the bathtub.

Minhyun hugged his husband carefully to make him out of the bathroom ignoring being soaked by the shorter male’s wet body. Dongho’s completely wet pants were dripping water all over the floor they had passed but that was the last thing Minhyun would have been worried for. The burn on Dongho’s skin became unbearable when there was not coldness on it to soothe, making his whines louder and more painful. The hot summer night wasn’t helping, either. They went into Dongho’s room in hurried pace and Minhyun made the shorter lie on the soft bed causing all the sheet soaked in water and climbed the bed on his knees leaning towards Dongho’s chest with a burn cream in his hands. When his hand was about to touch the irritated skin, he was stopped again with a tight grip. The taller inwardly cursed in frustration and looked at the direction of the door which was open until its end.

“Just stay still. God damn it, Dongho!!! I don’t want to explain the reason why I can’t apply a fucking burn cream on my husband’s chest to your mother? Do you want to explain it?” He whispered harshly gesturing the shorter open door of the room. _Why is he so stubborn even when he is so much in pain?_ Dongho loosened his hard hold on Minhyun’s wrist to let the taller.. when Minhyun felt Dongho’s inner war and protest vanished, he opened the tube with a click and took a small amount on his hand before applying it on gradually-getting-worse-burn.

As soon as Dongho felt the cold and slick cream touch his skin, he couldn’t stop his groan and buried his head into the pillow slightly arching his back which made Minhyun’s hands draw back hesitatingly. He hated to see Dongho in pain. He hated it with his all might and he did what he could think to decrease the pain, the shorter suffering from. He suddenly started to blow on the red skin strongly. _Is it right? It should soothe the burn, right?_ And then he heard Dongho’s light and shaky chuckle.

“You are like a mother.”

“Shut up!!! You should have been more careful while digging into a hot pot!!!” Minhyun snapped back still blowing and trying to apply the cream at the same time.

Dongho inwardly refused to admit but his pulse started to rise with the sight of Minhyun blowing nonstop with an O shaped mouth and felt something warm in his body except the burn on his chest. He really …. really couldn’t get it. The taller was being extremely sensitive and blowing after applying a small amount of cream on his skin, from his collarbones to his tummy patiently. Why did he always have to do this to him? Confusing him to death; pulling and then pushing him away. Just a few hours ago they were like strangers -they weren’t even friends-but now the taller was taking care of the burn with great attention and sensitivity. What the hell were they? They were friends or not??? They were just role mates playing a love game??….

……………….

The pain had already subsided just leaving a discomforting and tingling sensation behind after 2 hours. He was still lying on the bed- with dry sheets that his mother had changed- and Minhyun was talking on the phone with his father to inform them they wouldn’t be able to come back home tonight. Mrs. Kang appeared on the door with a smile on her face and headed towards the bed her son lying on.

“Are you ok, Dongho?” she asked still worriedly but a bit relaxed after seeing her son lie with a soft face. She sat on the edge of the bed and took Dongho’s huge hand into her small hands

“I am fine. Don’t worry mom!”

“How not when I have a son like you? Your clumsiness will make me have a heart attack one day” she smiled looking at Dongho who was smiling back lightly, too.

“Good night,” she said leaning towards and placed a kiss on her son’s forehead being careful not to make contact with the burnt skin.

“Good night, mom”

“Good night, Minhyun-ah”

“Good night.” she made her way towards the door and closed it leaving an-awkwardly-standing Minhyun in Dongho’s pajamas and lying-topless Dongho on the bed behind. Minhyun cleared his throat destroying the sudden silence pressing the room.

“I have told them. We will go back tomorrow morning.”

“Ok. …And I just wanted to say these really look good on you” Dongho said teasingly with a warm chuckle closing his mouth not to burst into laughter. Minhyun’s cheeks and ears burned when he made sense of the sentence. The cool breeze was making the brown curtains wave filling the room with sweet-summer night smell. Dongho sighed with tiredness and closed his eyes while Minhyun still looking at the short but large pajamas he wore, with a blushed face After a few long moments of not uttering any word, Dongho was the one who disturbed the silence

“You will not just stand there all night, right? But …………if you want to sleep on the floor, it is fine.” He said putting his arm over his closed eyes.

“In your dreams” Minhyun argued back softly winning a light chuckle from the lying man and made his way towards the _extremely _small bed. The taller sighed and lied on the soft sheets with a useless attempt to slow down his beating fast heart. When could he learn to control his body’s reaction for this man? It had been just one fucking day but he had already missed lying on the same bed with Dongho. He had missed his warmth and all existence although he had promised himself he would stay away from him but now he was fighting with himself again. _His damn traitor body and heart._ Their slightly touching legs, Dongho’s broad and shirtless chest, his body’s warmth leaking weren’t helping to control himself, though. Every wall he built around himself was about to collapse. The musky and woody smell he had started to like so much for 2 months surrounded his senses. He knew it was wrong… it was dangerous to be in the same bed with the man you loved..you craved for especially if you were trying to suppress your feelings for your mental state. It was confusingly dangerous. _That damn small bed_. He let out a shaking breath again watching the ceiling and

“I am sorry, Dongho!” he just blurted out maybe with the aim of distracting himself from other things occupying his brain.

“For what?” Dongho asked wondering the reason for that sudden apology. His consciousness was about to slide into a deep sleep.

“You know, I had a bad day back then and snapped it out on you….. I didn’t mean it. I am sorry”

“I am sorry, too.” The shorter said sighing with tiredness but kept “For telling our secret to Jonghyun” There was silence again and Minhyun knew the shorter had already fallen into the sleep.

“Good night.” he whispered and an answer didn’t come out, confirming his thoughts.

Keeping distance… No..… He had already known that he wanted Dongho in his life whatever happens. Unimportant titles… maybe not as a husband, not as a lover…. Friends… no matter how much the thought hurt…. Let it be then…. Friends….better than nothing…. He let out out a shaking breath and closed his eyes trying to sleep but he knew he would fail all night…

*

“Don’t worry our mom and don’t fight with your friends. Ok?” Dongho said kneeling down to see his little brother’s pouting face.

“OK. But hyung… do you have to go? I miss you very much.” Jinho said pouting and looking into Dongho’s eyes.

“Yes, I have to go. But I will visit you soon again.” the older said softly patting the small head and placing a kiss on the strands of silky hair.

“See you soon, son… take care Minhyun-ah!” said Mrs. Kang waving at the couple.

“See you. Thanks for everything. Mrs. Kang” Minhyun said slightly bowing before making their ways towards the car.

“Your body?” the taller asked turning his face towards his husband placing himself on the seat.

“Hıı? Aahh! I am fine” Dongho said while trying to buckle up the seatbelt. Minhyun cleared his throat and asked

“Are you going to meet with Jonghyun tonight?”

“Yes….” Dongho said recalling the phone conversation between him and his best friend.

“Minhyun…. are you sure it is ok for….??”

“Yes…yes, it is fine.” Minhyun immediately answered back cutting Dongho out as he was scared of what he would say if he hesitated a moment more.

“Just be careful not to be seen by paparazzi; they can be pain in the ass.” The taller kept smiling and pressed the gas to leave Kang’s home back.

………………

His brain had been already buzzing and ears drumming when he went out of the oppressing place. He could still hear the beat of the music, people laughing and the chinking sounds of the glasses. He couldn’t call Seongwoo, either because his friend was working his ass off at the café. breathing out he pulled out his phone to look at the message Dongho had sent him half an hour ago.

** _I am leaving home now. I will probably be at the Han riverside and may be late. If there is a problem, call me. I will send you the exact location in any case._ **

His chest had been struggling under a heavy rock causing his breath knot in his throat since he had seen the message.

** _I don’t want to hurt him. I hate seeing him crying and just passing by me like….like a stranger._ **

** _Probably yes. I would date him and maybe marry him. We can’t know the future, right? But there is no reason not to give us a chance. I know him, he knows me. He stood by me every time that I struggled. So, I think it will be an injustice to him not to try even if I see him only as a friend.”_ **

These sentences were echoing in his head loudly. With a long car horn warning him, his senses returned to him and he realized he had been walking in the middle of the main road. The car stopped with a hissing break sequel and Minhyun heard “Are you drunk, you fucking asshole…??” the driver’s angry voice before getting off the main road full of the whizzing cars.

“God damn it!!!”

“Just stay away from him. Is it really that difficult?” he said loudly to himself rubbing his face with his hands. _To let him go…To let him have his own life…. To let him date someone else…To let him have a real marriage…._ He breathed out and turned back to the club with decisive steps.

…………………

The air was full of with the cool summer-night breeze, the river’s calm flowing sound and peoples’ murmuring. It was really crowded. The couples walking hands by hands, the men going for a night walk with their pets, friends drinking beers while lingering around, girls speaking and chuckling while sitting on the grass, tourists taking selfies.

Dongho looked around to spot his best friend among the crowd and walked towards the bench they had sat together 3 weeks ago. The day Dongho had blurted out and made Jonghyun doubt about his marriage. When he approached enough, he saw Jonghyun had been already sitting on the same bench watching the gorgeous river view.

“Jonghyun..” Dongho called out softly making the shorter look at his direction. “Dongho! you came!” Jonghyun said with joy-shining eyes standing up from the bench and turning his body towards the taller.

“Yes, you said it was important on the phone, remember?”

“I am glad you came, sit,” Jonghyun said gesturing the empty part of the wooden bench. For a few long minutes, they just listened to the sounds and noises around. It was peaceful. And the silence between them wasn’t awkward at all like it was needed in that exact time but Dongho breathed out and said disturbing the peaceful silence.

“Jonghyun!” Dongho sighed and kept hesitatingly. “If it is the thing that I guess, don’t please…” The shorter male’s heart skipped a beat and his breath knotted in his throat. To hear that from Dongho…. It was extremely painful…..The taste of the rejection…. but he had already tasted more painful ones. So, he breathed out and turned towards his friend

“No, I will… Dongho-yah. Please let me say all the things that I have wanted to say for a long time…..Like a real man…. I will not be coward anymore.” He stopped uttering the words recalling the pain he had endured for 2 months and kept after a long moment that felt like hours.

“I know it can ruin everything we had but I have to. Listen to me Dongho. I have lost you once and I know how much it hurts. When I saw you here sitting by my side and heard about your fake marriage, I just thought it wasn’t over. And……I am going to tell everything before I lose you again.………….. I ……… I love you. And when that ridiculous game is over, I want you to give me a chance. I want you to marry me.”

Dongho’s heart ached when he looked into Jonghyun’s eyes seeing all the emotions the shorter felt while uttering the words. He hadn’t even once thought Jonghyun more than a friend. Yes, they were friends for years but was this really a good excuse to reject his friend cruelly without even trying to see him different? He knew the answer….. No, it wasn’t and he would not do that to his friend….He would try with his all might……They could try…..

He leaned his head downward sighing to collect his thoughts. The decision had been made…. He raised his head to look into Jonghyun’s eyes again and opened his mouth to speak.

But before his words managed to come out of his mouth, he heard a familiar voice shouting his name and turned his head towards it

“DONGHO!!!!!”

And then he saw a tall man gasping for breath and the man’s fox-like eyes looking at him.


	13. The giveup

The words stuck on his throat taking away his ability to make even a simple sound when Dongho’s eyes landed on Minhyun who was trudging towards him and Jonghyun. The first thing he had seen in Minhyun’s eyes fixated on him was determination and……. _anger_. _Is there something wrong?_ Dongho instinctually stood up from the bench with the sight of the taller man and so Jonghyun, too. The summer breeze was keeping blowing on their faces calmly. But the situation…...

When Minhyun came near enough, his eyes slid from Dongho and locked on Jonghyun.

“Dongho!! we are going home… now” He said in haste not leaving his eyes on shorter male even for a moment. Dongho’s inner voice was screaming to him: _there was absolutely something wrong_. 

“Minhyun!!!What is happening?” he asked trying to understand the reason of Minhyun’s anger and the need for their urgent leave.

“We…. Are…. Going…..Home…. Now” Minhyun repeated pressing every word between his clenched teeth and grabbed Dongho’s arm hardly with his long fingers making the shorter confused and annoyed.

“You don’t have to go, Dongho!” Jonghyun said totally ignoring the tallest man’s gaze on him and trying to press the urge to tug away from the tallest male’s hand on his friend. “He is not your....” he couldn’t complete his sentence hearing Dongho’s pleading voice.

“Jonghyun…..please….” Dongho said urgently to cut his friend off. He was trying to both make sense of the events and control the humiliating situation. So, he didn’t want to deal with Minhyun’s distrust right now.

“I have to go.” But as soon as the sentence went out of his mouth, he regretted it, seeing the extreme disappointment in his friend’s eyes, just shining a few moments ago

“I will see you soon again” he added immediately ignoring Minhyun’s grab tightening around his arm and turned his back to his friend leaving him at the side of the bench with the soft sound of the river flow and murmuring of the passing people.

While making his way towards the car pulled over the road, Dongho tugged his arm away from Minhyun’s hold and then he heard

“Dongho! think about what I have said to you, I will be waiting” Jonghyun shouted towards his friend collecting his last piece of courage before Dongho got into the car.

The turn to the estate was confusingly silent. The only sound that could be heard was the whizzing sound of the cars passing by. Minhyun had made his decision whatever Dongho thinks he would confess his feelings and if necessary, he would beg Dongho to love him back. But he knew that wasn’t the right time to say anything leave alone a confession. He also knew Dongho was extremely angry with him and the silence was just drowning his anger… for now. He could see the shorter was gritting his teeth and biting his inner cheek watching the blurring street lambs and buildings so he let the silence fill the air in the car with the hope of it would succeed in pressing the anger Dongho felt towards him, but he knew he would have to face with it sooner or later.

When Minhyun pressed the brake after entering the huge and familiar garden of the estate, Dongho opened the door and slapped it hard without saying anything and confirming Minhyun’s thoughts.

It was late and probably there was no soul in the house awake now. Minhyun breathed out trying to calm his beating heart before opening the door of their bedroom. He couldn’t see any light coming out of the room, but he knew Dongho was there. He would tell him whatever happens…At least he would make Dongho understand his motives for acting like this half an hour ago. Taking one more deep breath, he pressed the handle and opened the door silently. As he guessed, Dongho was standing still in the middle of the room with his broad back turned towards the door.

“Dongho,” Minhyun called out softly stepping forward after shutting the door behind.

Meanwhile, Dongho clasped his fists closing his eyes and trying to calm down as he heard the calm voice behind him. No matter how much he thought, it was really humiliating and embarrassing. And he would really give a piece of mind if the taller couldn’t give a logical reason for dragging him like a doll in front of his friend

“Dongho,” the taller called out again softly

“Stop….It!!!!!! Hwang Minhyun.” Dongho roared between his teeth

“Dongho. I …”

“I can’t see any urgent situation here.” He turned his face towards Minhyun gesturing the room.

“I have asked you a million times and you said it was fine million times back. Can you explain what changed in a fucking half an hour?" His voice was full of pure anger.

“Dongho!”

“ARE YOU DRUNK?? .......I am not your caged animal!!! Hwang Minhyun. I have my own life and I CAN’T RUN TO YOU LIKE A LITTLE PUPPY WHENEVER YOU WANT .”

“Dongho! Just listen to me, please! I will tell you if you let me.” Minhyun pleaded and hoped Dongho would give him a chance to speak

“NO!!!!!! You can’t!!!! Who do you think you are to have the right to haul me in front of my friend like you are my owner and I am YOUR DAMN PET. WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM???????”

“I don’t want you to meet with him, that is why I…..”

“GIVE ME A FUCKING EXPLANATION TO MAKE ME NOT MEET WITH MY **BEST FRIEND**, THEN”

His heart wanted to scream his love, but his mouth said completely a different thing.

“U-until……until ….. we divorce” Minhyun shuttered

“So, you want me not to see him for 3 months more?????” Dongho retorted back as if he couldn’t believe his ears. Minhyun opened his mouth to say…. But he was cut off again by the angry voice of the man before him.

“Let me tell you a complete FACT then, Hwang Minhyun. I really don’t give a fucking damn about what you said or what you thought” Minhyun breathed out looking into Dongho’s spitting-fire eyes. He wanted to beg Dongho to calm down and listen to him for a few minutes. He wanted to talk about his feelings, the butterflies flying in his stomach, jealousy ditching his chest, his beating heart after a long time…. But his brain and mouth betrayed him bitterly…

“We had a deal. I am your employer and I don’t have to give you an explanation, Kang Dongho. I DON’T WANT YOU TO MEET WITH HIM……until …we divorce!” the last words had come out of his mouth as whispers since the realization of the sentence he just uttered hit his mind.

“You are …….a fucking asshole..” Dongho whispered back looking into Minhyun’s eyes and he passed by the taller without looking at the face he had really wanted to punch now and slapped the door making his way downwards; the silence and darkness of the huge hall, leaving Minhyun behind in the middle of the room.

The anger and embarrassment had surrounded his all existence. What did Jonghyun think while he was being dragged away like a pet? Where was his pride? Weren’t they friends with Minhyun?

He tumbled onto the couch without switching on any lights; maybe darkness and silence would help him to calm down a little bit. That was really …….annoying, humiliating and nerve-wracking. He had promised himself while saying -yes- among hundreds of invitees _he wouldn’t regret this marriage_. _No, I will not regret it._

“Dongho!” he heard a soft voice calling out his name from the darkness; he didn’t hear any steps but a sharp click of lambs lightening the hall immediately

“Ahh!!! Minki! is it you?” Dongho said straightening his lying body and trying to get accustomed to the bright lights, illuminating the room.

Minki was rubbing his eyes in a cute and pouty way. His hair was scattered around his forehead making him look like a small kid gotten thirsty in the middle of the night. The younger stepped forward after rubbing his eyes to make them used to the lights and stopped in front of Dongho before asking in a worried tone.

“Did you guys fight?”

“No! No! we didn’t” Dongho said shaking his head. There was no need to make people worry.

“So…. you decided to sleep on the couch instead of your comfortable bed for joy tonight? Please….. don’t give me that bullshit. And you are really a bad liar.” Minki said grinning after sitting on the couch across the one Dongho sat.

“I know.”

“The whole house heard it, but you are lucky since dad is a heavy sleeper or he would probably kill your husband tomorrow.” Dongho just smiled looking downwards “I have been advising people not to marry for years and I guess I am too late for you”

“Yes,….. you are late.” Dongho said chuckling and raising his ring finger into the air showing the ring surrounding his long knuckle; inwardly trying to convince Minki it was just a simple argument.

“I think it is jealousy, right?” _No!! it is just your brother is being an asshole._

“I guess so.” The older said ignoring the thoughts lingering in his mind.

“He loves you, Dongho!......” Minki said softly whispering with his still-not-recovered-from-sleep-voice making Dongho raise his glares from his knuckles.

“I mean….. I can see his feelings in his eyes. He is my brother and I can say that he is considerably different from the time that I had to leave here. He was like death lingering on him all the time; not smiling, not speaking, not eating, completely without any slight emotion but now he is living, Dongho. I know he can be sometimes snobbish, stubborn, thick-headed but he is really caring, lovely, selfless and sometimes weird.” Minki chuckled while uttering the last word.

“I may not have an opportunity to say those next days so …..thank you. And now sleep here just for one night but the next day you have to turn to your bed’s comfort.” Minki said smiling at Dongho and standing up from the couch yawning and groaning while making his way towards the upstairs.

*

Minhyun sighed and leaned back to his chair thinking about Dongho’s face last night. It was a really busy day but his mind was full of his husband so he had had to cancel the meeting in the middle of it with a lame excuse among so many surprised gazes of the clients.

“That’s, I fucked up everything”

“Minhyun!! Let’s accept it, my friend. You are really fucked up.” Minhyun let out a sigh closing his eyes

“You should see his face when I …”

“No need!! Believe me.” Seongwoo heaved anxiously straightening his body on the leather couch in front of the office table.

“It was wrong Minhyun. Before telling how you feel about him, you can’t expect him to understand your motives. He is not your belonging, remember?”

“I know but I couldn’t stop myself, then.”

“You should have. Even before trying to steal his heart, you act like he is yours with his all existence. And let me tell you one more thing. Even if he falls in love with you, he will probably refuse everything because you act like a great asshole.”

“Really thanks for your supportiveness” Minhyun said acerbically opening his shut eyes.

“It is not an attempt to support but reality, Minhyun. As always, you are really being a weirdo. And I am really sure that is the exact thing he thinks about you now.” Seongwoo retorted back.

“Seongwoo-yah, you can’t really understand me; Jonghyun loves him and knows about our fake marriage.” Minhyun leaned over the wooden table thrusting aside the papers on it.

“Then you should tell him about your feelings instead of telling him what to do or who to meet Minhyun! He is a man like you. He has pride. As soon as possible, before he grows any feelings for Jonghyun or someone else.”

“That is it?? Really? I know that too, idiot. The matter is how I will tell him. I don’t think he wants to see my face anymore leave alone the fact that my mouth turns into a stamped hole when my eyes meet with his.” 

“ I think you need some practice then.” Seongwoo told making his way towards the tall man and grabbed Minhyun’s wrist pulling him towards the larger couch.

“Now.. sit.” Seongwoo said after seeing his friend’s confused expression trying to follow him.

“Let’s imagine I am Dongho.” “You?” Minhyun asked chuckling after making sense of what Seongwoo wanted to do. “Excuse me, I am what you have for now.. ..you ..asshole.” The brunette retorted back and kept “Let’s do it…Stop showing your damn teeth.”

Seongwoo straightened his posture and said thickening his voice “Minhyun! You wanted to talk?” Minhyun tried to stop the grin on his face and he cleared his throat after breathing out.

“Yes. About us. You and me.”

“What is the matter?” Seongwoo asked without breaking his seriousness.

“Actually, I wanted to talk with you about my feelings”

“Feelings??” Seongwoo raised his brows and made an O shaped mouth causing Minhyun to fight with his grin again

“Yes, You know we had a deal with you…..we would pretend a married couple and lovers…. but as the time passed…………” Minhyun gulped involuntarily. “That is, the more I spend time with you….”. _What the fuck is it? _It wasn’t even a real confession but he could feel the sweat rolling upon his forehead. _Was that really hard to say I love you?_

Seongwoo, pretending like Dongho, felt Minhyun’s tension and said to encourage his friend to keep.

“Yes???”

“After….after spending time with you... I realized I want you.”

“What??” The brunette punched Minhyun’s shoulder making the latter wince with pain and rub the spot.

“Seongwoo! What the fuck are you doing??”

“Ahh! Sorry, I guess I got into the role too much” he said teasingly and kept “But Minhyun!!!! if you say him _I want you_, you will probably feel a heavy punch on your chin instead of a soft slap on the shoulders. You know? You should say _I love you_ Minhyun not _I want to get laid by you_.”

"Let’s try it again” Minhyun said too conscious of his crimson- red ears, causing Seongwoo to smile and nod. The day was still young and they had plenty of time for practicing.

*

He looked around. Everything had changed drastically in the last 7 years. The trees around had lessened and small cafes had turned into huge skyscrapers. He wasn’t even sure how he found the place but looking at the old house now. There was nothing left from the past except the small house with a small garden among the buildings. The sun rays were being blocked by the huge structures around making the house look darker. The house he had the brightest days of his youth... The house he had the worst day of his life...His heart started to beat hurriedly causing his breath to get faster.

_7 years…._ he thought…..F_ucking 7 years_. And now he, looking at the small house again was about to repeat his wrongdoings causing him to leave his family and hometown again. He internally hoped he wouldn’t see the face he wanted to see for a long time when he decided to come here. Probably, he had moved somewhere else, right? What was the feeling ditching his chest then? The adrenalin caused by fear or his wish to see him? He couldn’t know but he knew he was doing something wrong again. He shouldn’t be here now. But his lungs let a breath out and his legs stepped forward. When he approached the door enough, he raised his shaking hand and knocked at the door. Probably…… Probably an old woman would open it. _No need to make a fuss_ he thought. And then he felt an itch to escape. _What if…? What are you doing here? Will you really do that to yourself, your mother, your father, and Minhyun again? No … No way_.

He turned his back and started to walk hurriedly towards the exit of the garden but a cringy sound of an opening door made him freeze at his spot in the middle. And then he heard an angelic voice calling his name.

“Minki!”

Then Minki couldn’t stop himself and turned his face towards the man he both wanted to see and the man he had cursed at so many times. The man he had loved a long time ago… The man caused his life to turn upside down…

*

The rain season was about to come. The pressing damp and hot air had been making hard to breathe for a week but tonight cool summer night breeze making the huge tree leaves rustle and spread the fresh smell of the flowers into the air. It was like one of the days left from spring.

Dongho was sitting at one of the couches located at the poolside with closed eyes and head leaned to the side of the couch. Meanwhile, Minhyun had been watching the man for 10 minutes standing still at his spot. _Maybe he is really tired…Maybe not the correct time to talk_. Minhyun thought. He was still safe among the trees, far away from the other man. But he shook his head to ignore the lack of confidence hunting him down for 10 minutes and wash away the ridiculous thoughts.

Until now hundreds of men and women had screamed their love to his face and now it was his turn. _Divine punishment._ Everything would get worse if he let his fears surface again. Whatever happens, he should talk to Dongho tonight. The last 3 days, he completely got the fact that he didn’t want to live without Dongho and lose him in the next 3 months. Even the thought was enough to spread a painful cringe to his all body.

The tall man gulped and stepped towards the trees making his way to his husband. He could feel the cold sweat freezing his hands despite the mild weather and his heart was beating like it was going to explode at any moment. 

When he finally arrived at the end of macadam road among the trees, ignoring the cold sweat his body pouring, he sat down on the couch next to Dongho making him raise his head and look at his unexpected companion. 

“What are you doing here?” Minhyun asked looking at the man

“Just trying to collect my thoughts. Nice weather to do it” Dongho said softly without opening his eyes. Minhyun hummed and didn’t destroy the silence between them until Dongho started to talk again

“You are late for dinner.”

“Yes,…….. some issues came up.” he said unwilling to detail the said issues. He had been in his office all day trying to collect his courage, trying to convince himself, practice the words he would say over and over with Seongwoo.

“Did…..did we make it up?” The taller asked anxiously afraid of Dongho’s still being angry with him.

“Yes. We did.” Dongho performed a gummy smile still not opening his eyes. His head leaned back and Minhyun could see the sharp beard-line on Dongho’s exposed throat and neck.

“Today, I had an appointment with registrar’s office in the university.” Minhyun’s thoughts got disturbed with Dongho’s calm voice and he tried to make sense of the sentence for a few moments but, it wasn’t easy with an exhausted brain, crazy beating heart, sweating hands and strange thoughts in his mind.

“That means…..” he managed to utter.

“I will go back and complete my study.” The shorter said after opening his eyes and straightening his body on the soft couch.

“Really!!...... I am really glad to hear that, Dongho. You should…. You should really.” Dongho’s face brightened with a silent and gummy smile looking at Minhyun’s happy expression. _He is really selfless _Dongho thought_. _After a few minutes, he realized he had been looking at Minhyun for too much long time and turned his glares towards the pool.

“Dongho!” Minhyun called out

“Hmmm.”

“I want to talk about something with you.” Distracting the man watching the lights reflecting on the surface of the dark water and made Dongho turn his body towards the taller.

“I am sorry….If I hurt you last night….. I didn’t mean it.” Minhyun said looking into Dongho’s light brown eyes. The taller was extremely conscious of his fast-beating heart, sweating hands, his tended to shutter tongue.

“I know. Don’t worry.” Dongho said looking at Minhyun’s face but the shorter was squinting his eyes. Minhyun breathed out to regulate his respiration and kept not paying attention to the Dongho’s focused look at his face.

“You know…. we had a deal. We…. would pretend like lovers and a married couple. But…” Minhyun was trying to recall all sentences he had repeated over and over again. He raised his head from lap to look at Dongho’s face to keep up with the conversation, then everything froze in a moment. Dongho abruptly leaned forward causing Minhyun’s breath to knot on his throat obstructing him from uttering any more words. He could feel Dongho’s hot breath on his face. _What is that? Will he kiss me???_ And then the shorter cupped Minhyun’s face with his left hand and rubbed his thumb twice over the soft cheek.

“Sorry, there was a stain there.” _What?? A stain?? On my face??_ His whole body had lost all vital functions when he felt Dongho’s hot breath on his face. _Because of a fucking stain???Anyway!!! What was he going to say before the stain broke into his speech?_ Minhyun cleaned his throat and tried to keep

“But …. C-curb……can't…..human…. the ……emotions”

“What?” Dongho asked confused after the senseless words coming out of Minhyun’s mouth as shutters.

**“SHIT!!!!”** Minhyun cursed between his teeth after sighing and turned away from Dongho’s glares

“Minhyun! What is happening?”

“Nothing... Nothing…really…I will talk to you later.” he said and stood up from the couch cursing at his damn luck thousand times.

*

Seongwoo gritted his teeth. That girl started to wrack his nerves. Especially her unnecessary smiles and glares thrown at Daniel across the café, her sizing him up from top to toe, her attempts to speak with Daniel using lame excuses, while speaking her flipping the hair and shooting glares under her eyelashes… Everything about her was nerve-wracking. He was sure Daniel would find at least a paper written numbers on it in his pocket at the end of the day though the sun had just risen up and the city had just started to awaken from its slumber. The café was filling with the office workers and college students from time to time but it wasn’t too much crowded now except the unnerving girl group.

“Everday, it is like that?” Seongwoo asked Guanlin passing by him to get the apron from the drawer.

“Hımm?” The younger asked not being able to follow the tall man’s question. Seongwoo gestured the table with his head at which three girls sitting, chuckling, ogling Daniel at least for an hour and asked again

“It is like that every day?”

“Haaa!! Actually, you should have seen them 2 months ago.” Guanlin answered back smirking after getting what the tall man meant.

“Them?” Seongwoo asked again not leaving his gaze at the girls.

“With Dongho hyung! Here was like … a host club. I have even heard girls calling them out “Kang combo”, “Deadly pair” , “Daddy combo”. They had so many nicknames and I bet this girl will ask for Daniel hyung’s number if she is brave enough” Guanlin said smiling and put on his apron tying it from behind.

Seongwoo turned his glares towards the glass door to look at the man who was re-arranging the tables outside to make the place for more people. When he tugged his gaze away from the door, Guanlin had already left and been clearing one of the tables outside. He raised his head with the cringy sound of a rubbing chair and saw the blonde girl approaching the counter.

“Excuse me!” she said with her soft and thin voice. She could be counted as beautiful “I think you are his friend?” she asked Seongwoo, gesturing Daniel outside.

“Yes, I am.” The tall man tried to answer back calmly but it was really hard since this girl had irritated him for last an hour. “So, you have his number?” Seongwoo nodded grinning. _What a brave girl…but is not enough to ask Daniel himself for his number ….my blessed luck ….._The blonde girl’s eyes shined with happiness and she kept taking courage from the soft expression of Seongwoo. “Can I have it? I promise I won’t annoy him.” The tall man breathed out and licked his lips

“But before I give his number to you, would you like to hear a very special secret about him?” Seongwoo asked looking directly into her eyes and leaning towards the girl. She nodded happily and waited for him to keep.

Seongwoo leaned near enough to whisper into her ear “He has a boyfriend and his boyfriend is me.” He waited for a few short moments there to be sure the girl got the meaning of the words and drew himself back from the counter to watch the girl’s confused expression turn into an embarrassed one. She abruptly made her way towards the table and collected her belongings spread over the chair. She went out of the café with haste in companion of her friends leaving an-enjoying-victory Seongwoo behind.

*

“I thought we were going to a club. Here is..??”Dongho said looking around. Chic suited waiters and waitresses were serving while a piece of soft and slow music flowing inside the restaurant. Here was too much luxurious for Dongho’s both taste and his casual clothes.

“I had too many meetings today. I guess I decided not to add more pain to my head.” Minhyun said grabbing the glass filled with vintage. Dongho chuckled looking down at his clothes. The taller man was sitting in his black suit looking too attractive and handsome for his own sake meanwhile he was in his casual t-shirt and jeans.

“This is a good decision by the way. But you should have rest at home.”

“I just felt like eating out with you. Can’t I?” Minhyun said softly looking at Dongho sitting across him. After his unsuccessful attempt to confess yesterday evening, today he made sure the distance between him and Dongho in case any clumsy or unexpected incident. And maybe the atmosphere would help him to talk bravely; he should admit that it helped a little bit.

“Of course, you can…” Dongho said looking back Minhyun but he felt something intense from the taller male’s stares and turned his eyes away before feeling too awkward and looking around to see if there was any waiter approaching their table with a tray full of food.

“Actually I have been trying to find a chance to talk with you about us lately. I guess this is a good chance” Dongho said turning his glares on Minhyun again.

“Us??” Minhyun asked surprisedly. _What could it be?_ _Maybe Dongho loved him back?? What else could it be about both of us?? _His heartbeat started to accelerate and his hands to sweat. He put the glass on the table to prevent any pouring or breaking accident that will destroy the conversation.

“I didn’t want to delay it anymore” the shorter kept breathing out and not leaving his gaze on the taller even for a moment.

“You can tell me everything, Dongho.” Minhyun said trying to control the reactions of his body. Dongho cracked a smile.

“Jonghyun ………said he wanted to marry me.” And told in one breath.

Minhyun’s beating fast heart stopped just a moment. _Jonghyun? Marry? No, please…….. Dongho…. Not now……. not when I was….. Please don’t break me into pieces…_Minhyun heard his inner voice begging the shorter.

“Did…… he? You ?? You want to marry him?” He asked calmly, squeezing his fists under the table until he felt the pain in his palm

“Actually you know what I think…. I want to try.” Minhyun just nodded not looking at Dongho’s face. He was afraid of himself now. Afraid of tearing down in front of the man he loved.

“And if you wonder why I am telling you these, I am aware that I work for you and you don’t trust him but I can guarantee he is not going to do anything that can hurt me and my family. So, at least I sometimes want to spend time with him…… as my boyfriend. I wanted to get permission from you for that.”

Minhyun grabbed the edge of the table. _Boyfriend… Boyfriend….._He wanted to turn it upside down, break everything in his way, hear the clinking sounds of the glasses shattering on the floor, shout and cry. But……_What could he do if Dongho wanted to try it with Jonghyun?.... What could he do if Dongho didn’t love him back?_ …………_NOTHING……A WHOLE NOTHING._

“Ok! it is fine..” He said leaving the edge of the table.

“Ohhh! I am relaxed now. Thank you” Dongho said leaning back and smiling. “And you?? I thought you wanted to talk about something yesterday”

“No, I didn’t. I just wanted to celebrate your return to university.” Minhyun said looking at Dongho, saying a completely different thing what his mind and heart screamed to him:

** _I have heard so many sentences about love, singed thousand of songs, listened thousand of stories, read thousands of books. But nobody told me ıt was that hard. looking into your eyes is like starting a new life, touching you is like touching the life itself. And your smell. Real love was the last thing that should happen in this game. But all roads are leading to you and 3 words are forcing my lips: I love you… Kang Dongho_ ** _._


	14. The Collapse II

Dongho raised his head from his lap and looked at his friend sitting across him. The sun had been shining at the sky and the city had already caught up with its usual routine. The office workers trying to return to their office after the lunch break. Students enjoying the weather. Parents taking a walk with their children and the small café was full of with the people who could find the time to escape from their rough routines for today.

“I am really sorry for the sudden leave last night. You know there was an …urgent situation.” Dongho said after clearing his throat. Jonghyun shook his head to show Dongho no need an apology but he inwardly had been wondering about the said sudden situation for 2 days nevertheless, he kept that for himself instead of stating it. The worst part was he knew Minhyun loved Dongho and wasn’t sure about whether the taller man had confessed his feelings to Dongho yet. His anxiety was about to devour his soul, let alone his not being able to sleep a wink for at least 42 hours. He had thought he would break the bed just turning here and there until he had a message from Dongho to meet at their favorite café tomorrow morning.

“No need to be sorry. I was just worried.” Dongho just let out a small smile and kept after sighing deeply.

“Jonghyun… I thought what you said to me and I don’t know how to start.” Dongho gulped skittishly and looked directly into Jonghyun’s eyes despite the nervousness gnawing inside him.. Meanwhile, Jonghyun was struggling with the tension circulating in his blood and trying to prepare himself mentally….for Dongho’s words that soon to be spilled. Collecting his almost-non-existed courage, Jonghyun suddenly stretched his arm to hold his friend’s hand-knotted on the table.

“You can say anything to me, Dongho” he said not stopping to cup Dongho’s hand with his. But he wasn’t certain about the -you can say me anything- part. _What if he rejects????.. What if he says no…???? Could he keep on being friends with him again? Could they laugh or touch each other without feeling awkward? Could he heal from that??? Probably No_…Although these thoughts causing his stomach to cramp painfully were filling his mind non-stop, he kept smiling and said

“I don’t want you to feel pressured since we are friends, Dongho.” not feeling confident about the said sentence again. He looked at Dongho’s face and waited for a short moment that felt like hours…

“I don’t feel anything romantic for you.” Dongho said in one breath directly looking at Jonghyun’s face after leaving his glares from their cupped hands. Jonghyun drew back his hands like they would burst into flame if they stayed there a little bit longer. Maybe it was because of the shock what he heard….Maybe it was because of Dongho’s straightforwardness. He pressed his lips into a thin line and looked down shaking his head slowly….Rejection…It was excruciating enough to feel like all limbs broken and all blood stopped circulating. He struggled with the thousands of emotions filling his inside causing the breath to knot in his throat.

“But you are my friend that I can trust even with my life. You have been always with me. We have struggled together and known each other for a long time.”

Jonghyun’s heart skipped a beat and waited for Dongho to go on but still not raising his head from his hands clenched under the table.

“I have been thinking since the day we talked, Jonghyun-ah!... And one day, if I will marry someone, there is no logical reason for that person can’t be you. So…I mean…. I want to try. Yes, it is true I don’t feel anything except friendship for you but I thought maybe if we spend time like …..like boyfriends, I can understand clearly and maybe change what is in my heart.”

_Boyfriends… Dongho and me??_ Jonghyun’s brain stopped all vital functions just for a moment. His mind trying to make sense of the words he had just heard, his heart to catch its usual rhythm, and his lungs to breathe.

“Wh-what!!” he managed to utter widening his eyes raising his head from the hands and looking at the man across him.

“I want to try, Jonghyun-ah” Dongho said again decisively and everything got cleared…

*

Dongho placed himself on the couch next to Minhyun who had been blanking out for at least half an hour. The sun had already lost from the sky and small lights of the stars had just started to shine on the darkness. “Won’t we go out tonight?” Dongho asked after waiting for a few moments with the hope of extracting a reaction out of Minhyun. They had already had dinner at the hall with the whole family and Minhyun had gone out of the hall without speaking to anyone placing himself on one of the couches at the poolside. There was something bothering Minhyun, Dongho could tell; in fact, everyone could tell it.

“No. We are at home.” Minhyun said almost whispering and not looking at Dongho’s face. Therefore, Dongho’s thoughts were confirmed the moment Minhyun spoke.

“Are you not feeling well?” the shorter asked worriedly and he fought back with his hands not to put them on Minhyun’s forehead to check the fever. 

“No.” Minhyun said leaning back to the head of the couch and closed his eyes “I just don’t want to go out tonight” The silence of nature was a sign the sky was about to deluge. 

“Everything is going well at the company, right?”

“Yes, it is” he said again with his neglecting manner and monosyllabic responses.

“Did Minki….. or your mother tell you something annoying?” Dongho asked hesitantly. _Maybe he argued with someone._

“No.” Minhyun answered back again with his monosyllabic tongue that started to bother Dongho.

“Did I do something wrong, then?” the shorter male kept worriedly with the hope of getting out of Minhyun more than single-word responses and made Minhyun turn his glares towards him at last. Dongho’s eyes were shining with the artificial lights leaking from the lamps. _His damn hazelnut eyes…Yes, you did the worst thing to me….Yes, you did….. You did it.._ Minhyun screamed inwardly clenching his teeth and looking into Dongho’s eyes. _What were you doing all day outside? You were with Jonghyun? Did you enjoy it? What did you talk about? Did you hold each other’s hands? Or do something more?_

“No! you are doing well with your duty, too.” He realized Dongho’s face softened after letting out a relieved sigh. “Then, are you going to tell me the reason of that face?”

“Don’t mind!” Minhyun turned his gaze towards the pool again playing with the phone in his hand and turning it recklessly.

“I will mind it and you will tell me!”

“Cut me some slack, Dongho!” Minhyun countered back still turning the phone between his two fingers

“I don’t want to see you this unhappy. And I think we are close enough to tell each other what bothers us, right?” Dongho said with a little bit louder than he intended. Someone passing through could think they were fighting.

“I fell in love….Did you get it? I…. fell. In. love….. Are you relieved now?” Minhyun said suddenly almost like whispering a crucial secret. He didn’t know what the fuck had gotten into him but he said it.

Dongho froze when the meanings of the sentence Minhyun had just uttered hit him. He felt something cracking his insides not being able to explain what that was.

“With whom?” Dongho managed to utter the words quietly like a whisper. Like he was afraid of hearing the answer. Minhyun turned his gaze to Dongho for the second time and looked into his husband’s eyes who was waiting for a response.

“With a man I shouldn’t.” Minhyun said and stood up from the couch not being able to bear anymore to look at Dongho’s face. To his husband’s face who had a boyfriend outside.

_I fell in love… I fell in love….Did you get it?.... With a man I shouldn’t…_ These sentences were circulating in his mind over and over. He had been closing his eyes just to sleep a wink but the noises of the words were getting louder and louder in his head making his skull ache. At last, he gave up on the attempt to sleep and started to watch the dim light reflecting on the ceiling, placing both arms under his head. His eyes slid to the door reflexively again, which he had looked at least ten times in half an hour but neither the door handle moved nor Minhyun came in.

There was something bothering him. It was like a strong hand squeezing his insides hard making his chest ache. He didn’t want to see Minhyun like that. He hated to see him like that…

\------

Minhyun looked at Dongho’s sleeping figure. His broad chest rising up and down regularly with his stable breath, his hair scattered on his forehead but his brows frowned like he was thinking something, slightly opened lips, the arms upon his head, almost invisible mole near the edge of his nose and a clear one near his thick eyebrow, every little detail he had viewed for 2 months. Every little detail made him feel strong pain in his chest. The sun was about to rise and he couldn’t sleep a wink again. His hands reached towards the sheet that slightly covering Dongho’s body but he stopped and drew back suddenly. _I will not do that to myself again _turning towards the door, he thought. He made his way out of the room not coming back until the sun had filled the room with its full-force lights.

Dongho opened his eyes with a slight groan. The sunlight was leaking inside making his eyes ache from the brightness. The clock was showing it was about to be ten o’clock and there was a very slight shuffling sound inside the room. He lifted his body on his elbows and saw Minhyun buttoning up a white shirt. Dongho could see his broad back.

“Good morning.” He said straightening his body in the bed 

“Good morning.” Minhyun answered back without turning his face towards the bed

“How…How are you today? I mean yesterday you…..” Dongho blurted out when Minhyun was about to go out of the room. “Not bad.” Minhyun said turning his face to Dongho who had already gotten out of the bed and standing in the middle of the room in his sleeveless shirt and shorts.

“Have ever talked with him? The man….you loved..” _I TRIED BUT….._

“No!” Minhyun said gritting his teeth “Will you?” Dongho asked hurriedly to prevent the taller go out of the room and to speak more.

“Why are you so interested in?” Minhyun retorted frowning and turned his whole body towards his husband.

“That is ……..I thought maybe you can’t …..since we are married.”

“No, it is not the case” Minhyun said and turned to exit the room

“I think…..if he is someone that you can trust, you can tell him it is a game”

“Like you did?” Minhyun blurted out of his anger not turning his face to Dongho and making him freeze.

“ Anyway. See you in the evening” Minhyun cleared his throat and made a move to go but he was stopped by Dongho’s voice again

“If you want, I can talk with him”

“Dongho!! I don’t need your help, please. Don’t…” Minhyun said reminding himself to stay calm and went out leaving Dongho inside the room with his thoughts and the squeezing feeling.

*

He looked at the too-familiar building in front of his eyes thanks to being friends with Jonghyun since childhood and opened the door after checking the time. It was 5 p.m. Jonghyun was probably about to finish his shift for today. The store was crowded and the crowd was mostly the students and young adults visiting the bookstore after a tiring day in the school or at the work.

His eyes spotted on Jonghyun who was telling something to two girls fervently probably about the manga he had been holding in his hands. That scene made Dongho grin and when he stepped forward, he heard a voice calling out his name.

“Dongho hyung, welcome!” Woojin said smiling childishly showing his snaggletooth.

“Ahh! Woojin-ah! Thank you.” Dongho smiled back to the younger. Jonghyun had been already making his way towards them when Dongho and Woojin finished saying hello to each other.

“Dongho!” he said surprised to see the man here making both of them turn their heads towards him. He seemed really tired, just said looking at the darkness covering the under of his eyes. _Maybe his shift was too early._

“Hi!”

“Excuse me??” all three men heard a thin voice echoing among the shelves. Woojin thinned his lips and said “Time to say goodbye. See you, Dongho hyung. Take care.” before taking the lead towards the girl reviewing the books carefully.

“See you.” Dongho said and his eyes slid to Jonghyun who already been looking at him with shining with wonder eyes.

“I am free today. I thought if you have time, we can… But you seem….”

“This…. is a date proposal??” Jonghyun said thinning his lips into a line to stop his grinning, but unfortunately failing...

“Maybe..” Dongho answered back looking at the cute expression on Jonghyun’s face.

“OK. I will be out in 10 minutes”

Dongho nodded and watched Jonghyun disappearing hurriedly among the huge shelves splitting the quadratic space into 4 halves. And he decided to spend 10 minutes more losing himself into the smell of paper filling the air.

The wind was blowing, decreasing the pressure of the hot and humid weather and the sun was trying to show itself among the black and white clouds. The coast side was full of people. Dongho and Jonghyun were walking side by side.

“Do you have a problem at home?” Jonghyun just blurted out disturbing the peaceful silence

“What!”

“I mean, your going out with me? You are married, remember?” He said grinning cutely and slowing down his steps.

“No! if you mean Minhyun. I have talked with him about ….us.” Dongho said slowly stepping forward harmonizing their steps’ speed. _Us _Jonghyun thought…_Dongho and me._ That felt like a dream. The dream that he had wished to be real for 7 years. He loved Dongho for a long time and the feeling ditching his heart had grown in passing years irreconcilably. When Dongho stood against up the boys to protect him, when they snoozed at the same bed after drinking a few shots-it was really hard to convince Dongho just to take a sip-when Dongho cried silently for his father’s death, when he smiled loudly, when Jonghyun watched him playing with Jinho, when he was eating with his all might and so many whens…

“Dongho!”

“Hmmmm!”

“You said you would see what was in your heart…. And I have been thinking about that…..How will you understand that you love me??” the question made Dongho freeze at his spot. The wind blew more eagerly towards his face. He hadn’t thought about that yet. _How will I understand?_ Actually, he hadn’t fallen in love with someone. Just small crushes too slight to be counted as love on beautiful girls and handsome boys. But he hadn’t felt anything enormous so far. Love had always been complicated for him. Both he had craved for and been scared of to death. It was like a forest you wanted to explore but afraid of being lost inside. He sighed and stepped forward again catching Jonghyun.

“I don’t know. How did you…?”

“Well! ….that is really hard to answer but I think … I got it when I saw you in my dream.” Dongho’s eyes widened and started to cough vigorously. Jonghyun looked at his friend….boyfriend and realized the redness covering Dongho’s ears and neck. Then it hit him.

“Oh My God!! No! No! Dongho! It…wasnot ……. A dream like you thought…. it was just a simple one” Jonghyun explained shaking his arms fervently and too conscious of his reddened cheeks.

“Hmm.” Dongho hummed stepping forward and not looking at the man walking beside him. _How much more can I embarrass myself?_ He thought and heard Jonghyun’s clearing his throat. Dongho thanked Jonghyun inwardly for the attempt to destroy the awkwardness blooming between them.

“But…… I think I had already been in love with you for….for a long time.” Dongho froze again and looked at Jonghyun walking slowly.

“The dream just made me understand it. I guess I was in denial back then or I had been thinking of it as friendly love. I was 17 or 18. One night I saw you and then everything had been enlighted why I had been excited when I saw you and why I had been upset when I left you. It was complicated but I knew it wasn’t a friendly love. Everything fitted in their places in one night like puzzle pieces.” Jonghyun finished his sentence turning the whole body to Dongho and looking directly into his eyes.

“Then… maybe I will have a dream like yours.” Dongho said leaving his gaze from Jonghyun and stepped forward.

“I will be waiting for it.” They both smiled and kept walking until the sun got lost on the horizon…Until the time to leave came.

*

While Dongho was pressing the door handle, he was expecting Minhyun to be there. But he wasn’t. Dongho hadn’t seen the taller for almost 2 days and that said man hadn’t been seen at the dinner, either. Moreover, Mr. Hwang was really furious about that and Dongho had to come through a crisis bursting out in the dinner table this evening. He sat on the bed and pulled out his phone to call his disappeared husband, deciding to give him a little piece of mind. But then his phone started to vibrate alongside the cheerful melody. It was Ong Seongwoo.

“Seongwoo!” Dongho said worriedly sliding the green icon and standing up from the bed.

“Dongho! I am at the door, right now..... With Minhyun and I need your help.”

“Ok. I am coming.” Dongho said and without hanging up the phone, he threw it on the bed and made his way towards the main door descending the stairs, and also trying to be extra silent. Everybody had just gotten into their room. It would be really bad both for Minhyun and him if Mr. Hwang got interrupted from his sleep. Hard to explain...

He opened the door and met with a drunk Minhyun and Seongwoo who had wrapped his arm around Mimhyun’s waist and desperately been trying to keep his friend on his feet. Dongho moved forward hurriedly and wrapped his arm around Minhyun. Seongwoo sighed in relaxation with the lack of Minhyun’s weight on him.

“The package has been delivered successfully.” The taller said whispering and grinning. “Good night”

“Good night and thank you” Dongho whispered and tried to both close the door and keep Minhyun from falling. 

“You drunk asshole!” Dongho grumbled and stepped forward. But Minhyun’s unbalanced steps were too loud not to be heard and Dongho had to ascend fucking too many stairs trying to be silent to arrive the bedroom. _If Mr. Hwang sees Minhyun that drunk, he will probably give a big tantrum._ _We have to be quiet_. Then Minhyun groaned making Dongho curse inwardly and he did the first thing that came into his mind, crouching and lifting Minhyun's body after making the taller lie on his arms. Minhyun leaned his head towards Dongho’s chest. Meanwhile, Dongho couldn’t believe what he was doing right now. He was carrying his fake husband to their bedroom in a fucking bridal style. _Anyway…_ Nevertheless, he thanked the days he had worked out to shape these arm muscles ascending the stairs and fighting with the door again to open it.

When he finally placed the drunk and sleeping man onto the bed, he sighed and tumbled into bed next to Minhyun after making his way towards the end of the bed to take off Minhyun’s shoes. “Bastard!” he mumbled again whispering. And then he felt Minhyun’s move in the bed and snuggle towards him. Dongho felt his cheeks burning and his eyes widened when the taller snuggle more wrapping his arm along his chest and nuzzle his neck. Dongho could feel the hot breath on his neck and smell of the heavy liquor in the breath coming out of Minhyun’s mouth. But there was the same refreshing smell pervading from his dark and soft strands. He closed his eyes focusing on that smell instead of the bitter smell of liquor and the sleep came to him quickly with the body wrapped around him.

_The wind was blowing lightly and the sun wasn’t hot like in the other days. People were passing by them murmuring something but none of them was meaningful to Dongho’s ears except one._

_“Everything fitted in their places in one night like puzzle pieces” Dongho couldn’t stop his smile when he heard that voice._

_“Yaaahh!” he said stopping to step forward and stretched out his hand to lock their hands with each other. There were peace and happiness filling his insides and he suddenly felt the urge to lean forward to place a kiss on his lips. He did so. It was really sweet and addicting. He pulled back and opened his eyes to look at the man smiling at him. He smiled back and they started to walk again swinging their locked hands. “I love you, Kang Dongho” he heard the man beside him murmuring. Dongho turned his head towards the taller and looked at his fox-like smiling eyes._

_“I love you, too Hwang Minhyun.”_

Dongho snapped his eyes open and tried to breathe regularly ignoring the fast beating in his chest. He looked around... The bedroom... He was in their bedroom…..not at the coast side. He closed his eyes throwing himself onto the pillow again but then he felt the hot air tickling his neck and turned his head towards the fresh smell. He saw the same man, same face, same silhouette he had just dreamed of…. 


	15. The resistance

He was feeling an extreme headache in his skull making him have hardship even with opening his eyes let alone move his body and his body was reacting pleasantly to a blissful warmness wrapped around him and the warmness he wrapped around. The last scene he had recalled for last night was his being drinking shots after by after in the club then the black leather seat of Seongwoo’s car. And now he was lying on a bed surrounded by musky and wood smell. The excellent musky scent that he had missed so much was lingering in the air, that scent he had been avoiding for 3 days. The scent that made him remember a certain man, the scent that made him remember the feelings he had for that certain man.

The pain in his head hadn’t decreased even slightly leave alone it was spreading over his eyes, his temple and whole body making him want to groan loudly. Despite the resistance of his eyelids performed, he managed to open them groaning silently to identify the source of the smell. And he found himself in the place he had wanted to be most but the place he should have avoided. Dongho’s arms were wrapped around him and his chin was pressing onto his hair lightly. Meanwhile, his own arm wrapped around Dongho’s waist and his eyesight was full of Dongho’s not-so-visible Adam’s apple. He could feel the sleeping man’s chest rising up and down with the steady breath of sleep, on his upper chest.

Minhyun couldn’t even breathe properly with the fear of waking Dongho up. He just looked at his pulsing point on his neck, examining the beard line like he was looking at a magnificent painting and focused on the small movement of his husband’s chest. _You have returned to him_ Minhyun thought to huff out a bitter silent smile. **_You have returned to him again. You want to be here, at that exact place, hugging him and ignoring he had a boyfriend out there. You want to breathe in his smell more, hold him tighter and never let him go._**

_“………You can’t understand the reason, right? Because you don’t know it doesn’t matter how many times you got rejected but love keeps blossoming like a flower again and again just to be plucked mercilessly.” _Seo-Jun’s words echoed in his mind suddenly and he couldn’t stop letting out a bitter smile again._ **I know it quite well now... How it feels… How much it hurts**_…

He moved slowly rescuing his head under Dongho’s chin trying to be careful not to wake the shorter up and slid his body upwards a little bit to look at Dongho’s face properly but not drawing his arm back from its spot, still wrapped around Dongho’s waist.

Dongho’s lips were partly separated and his face was beautiful and……peaceful in the dull light leaking from the large window. Yes, there was peace and happiness that settled down on Dongho’s face making him look like an innocent and happy child. _Maybe he had a very great day with Jonghyun_. _While I had been trying to dull the itchy feeling in my chest; just drinking out of my mind._

He breathed out a sigh not leaving his gaze from Dongho’s sleeping face. _WHAT IF..? WHAT IF? _This question was pressing into his thoughts, still blurred because of the liquor he had consumed a few hours ago. The irresistible urge to lean in was conquering his mind more irruptively with every second he had spent looking at Dongho’s face……. _Just a small peck. Nothing more_ he thought and kept leaning down until his lips brush Dongho’s slightly parted lips, lingering there more than he had intended. He couldn’t stop himself from whispering the words towards the mouth of the sleeping man.

“I love you….. Kang Dongho.” a small smile spread over his face, thinking he managed to say that sentence finally looking at Dongho’s face although the said man was in deep sleep at that moment. He drew himself back slightly placing his head under Dongho’s chin again and waited for sleep to invade his mind with a bitter peace.

The dull light reflecting on the wall probably coming from the moon was indicating that he wasn’t asleep for a long time. No sing of any dawn light … No sign of the sun. Just the darkness eased by the silver light of the moon was dominating the sky. _Maybe a few hours_ he thought… Since he had placed Minhyun on the bed. But now he was widely awakened with a beating-too-fast heart and perspiration damping his forehead. His breath was fast and barely silent. The images his brain forced on him in dreamland were still in front of his eyes like a ghost. The same peaceful feeling was still trapped in his body, making his stomach cramp pleasantly. The same happiness…

Dongho looked at Minhyun’s face again and the sentence repeated over and over in his head. **_“I love you, Hwang Minhyun” _**he breathed out trying to ignore the hot breath licking his neck every time Minhyun breathed out towards his throat and the arm wrapped around him tightly. He was too conscious of his beating too fast heart for his chest._ It is just a fucking dream. No need to exaggerate,_ he thought and drew himself back slowly from the sleeping man clinging to him. He made his way towards the bathroom thinking the cold water could be beneficial to decrease the amount of the heat clinging to his body. But after lots of splashing water on his every coverless body part, he realized neither his body listened to him nor his mind or heart.

“**_But…… I think I had already been in love with you for….for a long time………..The dream just made me understand it . I guess I was in denial back then or I had been thinking of it as friendly love. I was 17 or 18. One night I saw you and then everything had been enlighted why I had been excited when I saw you and why I had been upset when I left you. It was complicated but I knew it wasn’t a friendly love. Everything fitted in their places in one night like puzzle pieces.” _**Jonghyun’s sentences were echoed in his mind one by one. He let out a breathy smile looking at the mirror reflecting his too-wet figure and he said to himself not leaving his eyes on his reflection.

“That is ridiculous” grabbing the edges of the sink hard. When he went out of the bathroom, he was afraid to return to the bed and lie next to Minhyun. he was afraid to feel his heartbeat frantically again. He was afraid to realize the trueness of Jonghyun’s sentences.

So, he made his way out of the bedroom and lied on the soft couch at the hall failing to sleep until the sun rose on the horizon.

…………………

“Dongho!” he heard the thick voice calling out his name and raised his head from his plate he hadn’t been taking anything from for at least 15 minutes, just spinning some crumbs across. He had already caught himself staring at Minhyun so many times and he had resorted to lean his head down not to ogle the taller man anymore at the breakfast table. Let alone the strange feeling ditching his chest when he looked at the man; when he recalled the dream when he repeated the sentences and images over and over in his mind.

Now, the feelings and thoughts were disturbed by the oldest Hwang’s worried voice.

“Yes?” Dongho turned his face towards the old man.

“Is there something wrong? You seem worried about something.” Mr. Hwang asked with a genuine curiosity and worry looking at directly Dongho’s face and expecting a convincing answer. Minhyun raised his head, too

“No! No! I was just thinking of visiting my mother.” Dongho said thinning his lips into a gummy smile and slightly blushing because of the lie that slipped out of his mouth.

“Of course you should. She must have missed you.” Mr. Hwang said and left the cup on the table smiling warmly back to Dongho before standing up from the table. Minhyun turned his head down to his plate again, realizing Dongho wasn’t telling the truth. _He is really a bad liar. There should be something bothering him_ he thought _maybe something about Jonghyun. _He wiped his mouth onto a napkin and moved to stand up from the table to go after his father but he was stopped by Minki’s not so quiet whispering.

“How is your head, Minhyun-ah?” Minki said leaning towards him across the table with a naughty grin on his face making Minhyun think there were more intended in the younger’s smirk than he had felt

“Fine??” Minhyun said placing himself on the chair again and trying to understand what Minki was after

“Hmmm! I thought it would be exploded by now. The last time I saw you, you were in Dongho’s arms in bridal style and he was trying to ascend the stairs. I can’t tell he was having difficulty by the way.” Minhyun felt his body froze despite the drastic rise in temperature his body had. His ears were getting red ferociously and his eyes got widened. **_WHAT THE FUCK??? _**His brain literally screamed at him. He couldn’t remember anything when it came to yesterday night. _Bridal style…….Dongho………..._ The last scene his mind had recalled was Seongwoo, dragging him out of the club and into his car, swearing and cursing about how heavy Minhyun was. And his awakening in the middle of the night with his arms wrapped around Dongho. The time between these two was just blankness.

“And you were really enjoying it while you were snuggling against his chest.” Minki kept too-amused by the embarrassed blush garnishing Minhyun’s face. The taller male was feeling the heat rising in his every coverless skin but managed to collect his thoughts and pushed the embarrassment conquering his body aside._ Dongho is my husband… Dongho is my husband…_ He repeated the sentence over and over before saying something that would stop Minki utter any embarrassing word.

“Minki!!! I am sorry but I don’t think it is your business how much I enjoyed snuggling against my husband’s chest. Right?” Minhyun deadpanned at last gulping and causing Minki to burst into too-loud laughter. Meanwhile, Dongho dropped the cup on to the table at the exact time succeeding not to pour anything on the expensive wood.

“No…..it is not….. but I just wanted to say it. Because it is funny to see you blushing” Minki managed to utter between his giggles. Minhyun stood up from the table ignoring Minki’s irritating and smugly-grin.

“I am going…See you in the evening.” He said and made his way out of the main door leaving very-flustered Dongho behind at the table.

As soon as Minhyun got out of their sight, Minki turned his glares towards Dongho and asked “What will you do tonight?” leaning on the table with the naughty grin glued on his expression

“About what?” Dongho answered with a question struggling to ascribe meaning to Minki’s question and the expression younger had worn.

“Alright! I can say that you are not a romantic type but don’t you think it is too much to forget your husband’s birthday? And you are newly-married” Minki asked knotting his arms on his chest and raising his brows with a questioning look on his face.

“Ohhh!!!! You are talking about that?” Dongho managed to say without shuttering, innerly thanking his body for not betraying him. **_Minhyun’s birthday…. Damn it._**_ Why didn’t he warn me about that? ….Probably because that asshole was too drunk to utter any coherent word last night._ Dongho thought and looked at the younger, smiling and trying not to show the inner conflict he had been experiencing at that exact moment. Minki was too observant not to catch Dongho’s sudden confusion and attempt to lie_. I should be careful. Be careful_ he warned himself and kept with a small smile spreading on his face

“…Of course, I didn’t forget it even though I am not a romantic type.” Minki heaved a relieved sigh with convinced face and

“So, that means we aren’t celebrating it around the table just blowing out the candles with mom and dad, then going to bed with chickens, right?” asked with sparkling eyes.

“No. But I won’t give him to you, either. I am taking him.” The older male said destroying the younger’s hope of partying mindlessly. **_What??? What does taking him mean?? You idiot!!!_** “So it will be a special night?” Minki pouted leaning back to the chair and knotting his arms again.

“Sorry but yes.”

“Will you come back home or you booked a special room for tonight?”

“Minki! I won't argue with you where I will sleep with my husband and you have to find someone else to party with but don’t drink too much and don’t be late. Ok?” Dongho said hurriedly and stood up from the chair with the hope of rescuing himself from Minki’s too personal questions and moreover from his ridiculous answers.

*

Minhyun pushed the pilling folders aside and placed his elbows on the desk, rubbing his eyebrows and temple. The headache haunting him since the last night hadn’t waned even a little bit. It became considerably harder to focus on reading, analyzing, and thinking with every minute added to hours. That was the worst hangover he had experienced and his mind, being stubborn at recalling Dongho’s face when he had been sleeping wasn’t helping, either. Despite the embarrassment still wandering in his body, a small smile spread over his face when Minki’s words came back to him.

** _“The last time I saw you, you were in Dongho’s arms in bridal style and he was trying to ascend the stairs. I can’t tell he was having difficulty by the way._ **

** _And you were really enjoying it while you were snuggling against his chest.”_ **

His inner self was wishing he had been sober enough to feel being lifted by Dongho… To feel his muscular arms around him.

His not-so-innocent thoughts were scattered by a stable ring tone of the phone on the desk, deleting the grin on his face. He cursed at the irritating tone that was making his headache get worse with every second. He picked up the phone promising himself if it was Mr. Jung again, he would kick his ass out of the company.

“Mr. Hwang! Kim Seojun-shi wants to see you, sir.” said the young woman through the phone “Kim Seojun? Now?”

“Yes, sir. He is waiting outside your office.”

“Send him in.” Minhyun said and put the phone down with an anxious sigh escaping from his mouth. _Why he is here? Did he decide to blackmail me? Or reveal the truth?_ These questions were hanging in his mind space. Deciding not to overthink, he stood up from the leather chair. After hearing a deep sound of the wood, he straightened his posture and “Come in.” said towards the door, trying to ignore the tension growing up in his chest.

Kim Seo-jun got a leg in the door opened by Mr. Jung and made his way towards the taller, who was standing still behind his desk. Seo-jun was in one of his priceless suits and his hair was really well-done as always. When he approached in front of the desk, he stretched out his hand.

“It has been a long time, Minhyun-ah”

“Yes.” Minhyun grabbed the hand and shook it lightly. He gestured Seojun to sit on the couch located in front of the desk with his head and hand.

“And our last time wasn’t a nice one.” The tall man said after placing himself on the soft couch with a flopping noise.

The last one when Seo-Jun had told him about Dongho’s motive to accept the proposal.....**_Jinho_**. That truth was still making his heartache and an unpleasant feeling spread all over his body.

“So you came here to change it? To turn it into a nice one I guess?” Minhyun voiced his thought, remembering that horrible day after sitting on his chair. Seo-jun let a huffing smile escape from his lips and “You are snappy as always. I guess this is the most lovely thing that you have” Minhyun stayed silent raising his brows, against his unexpected guest’s unexpected comment.

“Anyway….This is for you” Seojun said burying his hand into his jacket’s inner pocket and left a small box on the desk in front of Minhyun.

“What is it?” Minhyun asked looking at the pleasantly-wrapped box but not reaching to take it.

“Don’t worry it is not a poison or a bomb or anything like that.” Seo-jun said smiling at Minhyun’s reaction full of doubt.

“Today is your birthday. Right? And I just wanted to give you a present. That is all”

“You didn’t have to.”

“You can’t just say ‘_thank you’ _?” he relieved an anxious sigh and kept “Anyway, we are friends Minhyun-ah! At least we were …. I just didn’t want to break the tradition just because you fooled me and made a fake marriage to get rid of me!!!”

“Why are you doing this?”

“Do what?”

“This!” Minhyun said gesturing the present.“You haven’t even tried to blackmail me about the marriage. Presents, sudden visits…”

“You didn’t understand it yet? It is simple………….because I love you.” Seo-jun said looking at directly Minhyun’s eyes and stood up from the leather sofa hurriedly without waiting for Minhyun to react and made his way towards the door he had entered a few minutes ago.

But the tall man stopped just before opening the door when he heard Minhyun’s soft voice calling out his name.

“Seojun-ah!” The said man turned back, Minhyun was standing in front of him not close but not far away, either.

“You can refuse what I will say right now. If you do, it is Ok.” Seo-jun's breath knotted in his throat but waited for Minhyun to go on with straight-face.

“I **can’t…..** feel anything for you but maybe…..maybe we can be friends like in the old days.” Seo-jun let out a small breathing smile thinning his lips into a straight line.

“I will think about that.” He said and opened the glass door to go out of the room.

*

Dongho looked around and thought of the day he had come here for the first time. It was the day his life had changed drastically and the scenes were still flying vibrantly in front of his eyes. The day Minhyun had proposed to him at the bus stop. The day Jinho had almost died. Remembering it made his heartache but a small smile managed to spread over his face. It had been almost 3 months since he had walked in the Hwangs Kingdom just to hand Minhyun’s watch in.

He breathed out and looked around again, focusing not to get lost among too many people running here and there. He passed the long hall and saw a desk three woman sitting and making and responding to the calls. He approached the dark-brown colored, long and rectangle wood and placed his arms on it. 

“Hwang Minhyun is in?” he asked the young woman who had just ended the call with an exhausted sigh.

“Yes, sir. But now he has a guest. I can inform him that you came.” She said, hurriedly standing up as soon as her eyes met with Dongho’s, the other two young women stood up, too clamping their hands over their stomachs and bowing slightly. _They must know me_ he thought, realizing the tension the three women spread into the air. It would be surprising to him if anyone in the universe didn’t know Minhyun and he got married leave alone the Hwangs’ employees after so many presses on the newspapers, magazines, and online news portal.

“No, thank you. I can wait.” he said performing a gummy smile, trying to be polite as much as he could and asked “You know who the quest is?”

“Yes, sir. CEO of Seoul Medics, Kim Seojun-shi”**_ Kim Seojun? Why does the name sound so familiar?_** “Do you have any idea how long it may take?” he asked in a friendly manner to decrease the amount of tension she had. “No, sir!” At that exact moment, the double-leaf glass door was opened and Dongho’s glares slid onto the tall, chic suited and too handsome man, smiling lightly. **_That face…_**

“_What does that mean Minhyun? What proposal is he talking about?” The man in a suit asked with a disappointed tone and I was the one who responded to these questions. “MARRIAGE PROPOSAL” I said with a decisive voice._

_“I would almost be engaged” Minhyun talked to himself with a smile on his face and kept giving short glances at me. My mind was going to the hospital, … to Jinho. “With Seo-Jun” he let out a relieved sigh turning his gaze at me again for a short time and said “You have saved my life twice”_

His ex-boyfriend….Seo-jun was Minhyun’s ex-boyfriend and ex-fiance. So, that name was familiar to him. His ex-fiance was coming out of Minhyun’s office smiling warmly but that wasn’t the reason why Dongho had clenched his hands into fists and why he had felt something pulling his insides. The reason was a question invaded every corner of Dongho’s mind. **_Why is Minhyun seeing his ex-fiance?_**


	16. Acception

**_Why is Minhyun seeing Kim Seojun?_** **_Why is that man smiling while going out of Minhyun’s office?_** The questions pounded his mind down as soon as he had caught the sight of the smiling tall man who was making his way out of the glass door. He was nearly as tall as Minhyun and had unnecessarily attractive features. No need to say he was like coming straight out of a fashion magazine.

While Dongho was grappling with his thoughts and questions, the glass door had already been closed creating a slight thudding noise. At that exact moment, Seo-jun looked forward, his eyes locked with the shorter man’s standing beside the secretary’s desk.

Dongho caught a glimpse of surprise on the taller’s face which was immediately replaced with a snobbish smirk. **_He remembers me! Me destroying his engagement party. Me, married to his ex-fiance._** The tall man stepped forward without leaving his stare on Dongho and let out a huffing smile while passing by the shorter.

Dongho couldn’t help but grit his teeth. _What was this show-off about?_ That face… that smirk ..that expression…There was something really annoying about this tall man that made Dongho feel uncomfortable, something that made his all nerves stand upon, something that made the strange feelings inside him intensify. He didn’t know why he had felt a suffocating urge to punch that face to get rid of the nerve-wracking smirk and watch it get wane in a second. He didn’t know why but he could feel the sharp desire.

Trying to gulp down the tension created by Seojun’s glare and smirk and remembering why he had been here in the first place, Dongho headed towards the glass door which was closed just a few moments ago. After knocking slightly, he slid into the huge room without waiting for any voice calling him to come in. Minhyun had already been making his way towards his desk before turning his glares back to see who had entered the room again. When his eyes landed on his next unexpected guest…

“Hi!” Dongho said smiling while heading towards his husband who froze at his spot with a slightly hung-down chin.

“H-Hi!” The taller responded back shuttering and trying to regulate the lingering questions in his mind. _Dongho? What is he doing here? Something bad happened? Did he see Seojun? Did they talk? Or …. Or will he talk about ….the last night?_ His thoughts got disturbed when Dongho asked looking around and Minhyun stared at the man unresponsively.

“You have a nice office. Can I sit?” when he approached the leather couch, widening his eyes and trying to ignore Minhyun’s blank expression.

“Y-yes please.”

The taller gestured Dongho to sit on the exact couch Seojun had sat on a few minutes ago after he had rescued himself from the shock invading his all body. Meanwhile, Dongho cracked a small smile at his success at extracting a reaction from Minhyun. The taller male pulled his chair and placed himself on it with a flopping noise, trying to calm down his heart and not to recall the conversation at the breakfast table this morning. Minki’s teasing face and Dongho’s surprised expression were still getting repeated in his mind. _Stop It. Don’t Think About It._ _Not Now_. Blushing in front of Dongho right now was the last thing he had wanted for the stability of his emotions. Trying to delete both visions and questions in his mind, he placed his elbows on the desk interlocking his fingers and leaned towards Dongho, whose eyes had focused on something on the desk. Minhyun’s eyes followed the route and then it hit him. The gift that Seojun put on the desk was wrapped elegantly and showing itself off with its shining silver line on the dark table.

“What is that?” Dongho asked and he knew it was probably the most stupid question ever that had slipped out of his mouth, nevertheless, he wasn’t able to control either his wonder or wish not to hear what his mind screamed to him.

“A present.” Minhyun said grabbing the small box immediately and stuffing it into the drawer on his right side.

“Hmmm. That I can see.” Dongho smiled trying to press the bothersome feeling in his chest.

“I think it is for your birthday, then” Minhyun raised his head from the spot that the gift had been and stared at Dongho before uttering the question

“How did you kn..?.”

“From Kim Seojun?” But Dongho found himself not letting Minhyun speak without feeling the need to answer the taller’s cut-off-question. _Why was he behaving like this? Why was he feeling like this? Why couldn’t he stop his mouth from uttering any more stupid things? Why the idea of Seojun’s giving Minhyun a present bothers him so much?_

“Yes.” Minhyun murmured trying to press the feeling, squeezing his chest. The intensity of Dongho’s gaze and expression had already thickened and he wasn’t sure if he heard bitter jealousy in Dongho’s voice. _No! it can’t be possible. His mind must be playing tricks on him._

“Are you seeing him? I mean …..romantically” _Why am I asking these questions that are none of my business?_

“No!... it is a little bit complicated” _Kim Seojun is in love with me but I am in love with you, my fake husband and you have a boyfriend named Kim Jonghyun out there._

Dongho shrugged the terrible thoughts conquering his mind and managed to say “Anyway…. Happy birthday.” with a soft voice.

“Thank you!….. How did you know?” Minhyun asked his earlier-cut-off question again gulping down the tension in his throat.

“Minki was very eager to party.” Dongho huffed a smile while recalling Minki’s face when he had announced there would be no party for Minhyun’s birthday.

“But I guess I buried his all hopes into the deep ground”

“Minki?”

“Yes. I wish I didn’t suck at lying. And …. I said we would celebrate it alone as….. a married couple. I am sorry I didn’t mean it….you know…… it just slipped out of my mouth.” Minhyun could see Dongho’s struggle to explain himself and that made him smile warmly before ending the shorter’s fight with the words. He had been still recalling the time when Daniel had come to his office to inform him about Dongho’s birthday party.

“No! no need to be sorry. Minki can be sometimes pain in the ass and I guess it is my fault not to warn you.”

“Yes. Exactly. It is your fault.” Dongho snapped back relieved. 

“Anyway. I mean we have a day to spend together…..if you don’t …have any special plan or something, of course. Because we both can’t go home. It will be suspicious”

“Yes, it will and no I don’t have anything special”

“Great! Let’s go home and wear something casual. No more suits…And you are mine ……..for today.” Dongho said more cheerfully than he had intended. Meanwhile, Minhyun was struggling between his mind and heart again because of the man in front of him.

“Have fun!!” Minki shouted towards the couple making their way out of the door. Minhyun looked up towards the voice and saw his brother leaning on the balustrade with a pouting face, cupping his left cheek with his left hand. He couldn’t prevent the chuckle from slipping out of his mouth since Minki was looking like a puppy being left behind by his owner.

“Do you want to come with us?” 

“Iııaaaackkk!!!! No! I am not fond of being third wheel” Minki retorted back still pouting “Just have fun but you owe me a party and I will make sure you repay it” 

“OK.” Minhyun said smiling and turned the door to get out of the house. He heard Minki’s voice shouting ‘Happy birthday’ and Minhyun murmured a ‘Thank you’ behind the already closed the door even though he knew his brother wouldn’t hear him.

Dongho was standing beside the car ready to go in his casual, manly, embracing his muscular body clothes. Minhyun shook his head slightly to get rid of the hotness-not caused by the boiling hot weather-spreading all over his body

“Dongho!” he called out and threw the key he had just pulled out from his pocket towards his husband “Hmm” the shorter turned to the entrance of the estate and saw an object already flying towards him and caught it reflexively.

“I think it will be better this way. Since you are the one who planned this….” **_Date…._**he thought but couldn’t complete the sentence. It was still enough. Even that was enough for him to feel the contentedness he had avoided for almost 2 weeks. He had already done it in his mind. Dongho chuckled staring at the key in his palm and made his way towards the front of the car while Minhyun had already been tugging his seat belt on the left side of the car. 

He watched Dongho with indescribable feelings conquering his inner. What was he doing? In the car going out with his fake husband whom he was in love with. He had promised himself heaps of times not to look at that man again. Not to spend even any slight time with him, not to fall deeper than already. But he was in the car with Dongho, going out for a date on his birthday like a real married couple and …already fallen too much deeper irrecoverably.

_It is my birthday after all and I can give myself a memorable gift he_ thought trying to make logical excuses for breaking his promise to himself.

Dongho placed himself on the driver seat and fastened the belt. He turned his face smiling at Minhyun.

“Are you ready?”

“Yes. But do you have to sound like Sherlock and John are about to get into another criminal adventure?” Dongho let out big laughter and said

“Don’t expect too much. It is just a boring birthday date.”

How could it be boring when he had Dongho on his side? Just looking at the man was enough to feel a large amount of adrenalin hormone climb in his body.

“I don’t. Don’t worry.” he murmured and turned his glares on the road when the car started off. _Just for once_ he thought and decided to let himself feel the happiness thanks to this man.

The sun was still shining on the horizon spreading its orange flow over the surface of the water and presenting its natural beauty to the city. People had been enjoying the last but suffocating days of the summer. Dongho and Minhyun were walking side by side with their harmonized slow steps as the human crowd was. They had stopped at the seaside after the latter had been nagging about how much he had missed the sea. They had found a proper parking area first and attended the flow of people walking at the seaside.

“You know.. it is really boring to spend your time in an office reading and signing thousands of paper.” Minhyun murmured looking at the mixture of the blue and orange on the sea. Dongho chuckled and turned his gaze on the tall man.

“Yes, I can imagine that.” Minhyun left his stare from the sea and turned his eyes on Dongho, smiling. When their eyes locked with each other’s for just a moment, Dongho understood the reason why that moment felt so right and familiar to him. The dream… The dream he and Minhyun were walking side by side just like right now… The dream they were in love with each other and exclaiming it freely…A pleasant heat spread over his cheeks and the rate of beating of his heart fastened a little bit above the normal. Maybe because of the dejavu feeling. His eyes unconsciously slid over the taller man walking beside him again and he couldn’t stop the flow of thoughts. _He is really beautiful with his hands in his pocket, a magnificent smirk garnishing his flawless face_.

“Dongho!! Look there” Minhyun suddenly said pointing somewhere exactly on their route with shining eyes. The shorter eyes slid to the spot Minhyun had already started to walk-almost run- hurriedly. People were holding something in their hands and the seagulls were competing with each other to get the thing from the hands stretched out. The children were screaming joyously and jumping around with screaming waves of laughter as the seagulls flew too close to their parents. Their cheerful screams were combining harmonically with the sounds of seagulls.

When he approached enough, Minhyun handed a piece of bread- probably he had borrowed from one of the parents- into his hands and started to push him towards the seaside.

“Minhyun-ah!!” Dongho struggled with the force of the push. “Dongho! please!” he didn’t know how he had ended up stretching his hand towards the sky but tried to convince Minhyun for the last time.

“I would rather eat the bread than feed the seagulls, Minhyun-ah” Minhyun rolled his eyes and

“I will buy a bag load of bread for you. Just stay still.” He said waiting for a seagull to snatch the bread piece between his fingers. Dongho couldn’t decide which one was worse; closing his eyes or not closing his eyes. When he felt the bread pulled out of his finger and heard a too-close scream of a seagull, he crouched down and “Ahhh, I am scar..” with his hand on his chest exactly on his heart. His silent screams of fear got disturbed with Minhyun’s loud laughter and Dongho turned his back to look at drowning-in-laughter Minhyun.

“Is it really so amusing? Hwang Minhyun?” Dongho said crossing his arms on his chest after moving away from the seaside. When Minhyun’s laughter had finally turned into giggles, he had managed to utter.

“You are afraid of birds?” like it was the most unbelievable thing he had found out.

“No! I am not..” Dongho deadpanned extremely-defensively like he wanted to prove his fear of creatures that had wings.

“Yes. You are! Dongho.” the taller said throwing his head back smiling with his disappeared fox-like half-moon eyes. He was obviously struggling with his laughter not to bother his husband anymore, pressing his lips into an invisible line.

Dongho felt something intense invading his all body. Something comparable to the feeling he had in his dream. _He is really beautiful._ Suddenly his heart rate quickened and his eyes lost his ability to move on something else except the man in front of him. When Minhyun’s giggles lost their noisiness he suddenly turned his glares onto Dongho. when their eyes locked with each other’s, Dongho was scared his thoughts being obvious, and he shuttered the first thing that came to his mind

“I am afraid of rats”

“Hm?”Minhyun raised his eyebrows making them disappear behind his soft brown strand

“I am afraid of rats and don’t like birds”

Minhyun giggled again “Finally I have found out something Dongho can be scared of. Dongho rolled his eyes and tried not to think about the feelings that invaded both his mind and heart.

“Let’s just go. I will die of hunger.” Dongho huffed grabbing Minhyun’s forearm as if his hand had belonged there.

The restaurant was two streets away from the seaside and could be counted as crowded considering it was one of the weekdays. It was containing overtones of hanok. Though the traditional structure it had outside, the inside was modernly-designed, mainly furnished white and blue harmonizing itself with the sea just a few meters below. Minhyun made his way towards the exit bowing the employee standing up in front of the door.

“What a handsome couple”

“Couple?”

“You didn’t see? They both were wearing the same wedding bands.”

“Ohh!”

Minhyun heard two girls whispering not so quite while he was just about to exit and bit his lower lips to prevent the laugh sliding between his lips. Dongho had just gone out of the restaurant and waiting for him outside with a contended face probably of a full stomach. The weather had already darkened and street lambs started to flash their wane light onto the narrow pavement.

“It was really delicious” Dongho murmured silently when they started to walk towards the seaside to reach the parking area they had left the car.

“Yes, but you should have eaten more slowly. I had to remind you there was nobody to take it from you so many times.”

Dongho cracked a sincere smile and “Now you really sound like my mom Minhyun-ah” said looking at his husband’s face. Minhyun rolled his eyes but didn’t comment. At that exact moment, he felt a wet and heavy drop dribbling down on his cheeks and reflexively looked up the sky. Another and another drop. Without getting a chance to look at Dongho, he felt long and thick fingers wrapped around his wrist and dragged by a force of the pull making him step forward hurriedly almost like running. When the pull was finally over, they were under a yellow plastic ceiling connected to a small store. “Wooah” Dongho murmured staring at the flow of the water flowing down from the side of the shelter. People who were enjoying the silent peace of the summer evening were scampering around probably looking for four walls with the ceiling. The streets had turned into a small river in leaps and bounds and almost got emptied except the whizzing cars probably trying to escape from the traffic jam that would be caused by the sudden pouring rain mercilessly.

Minhyun left his gazes from the pouring rain and slid them onto the man who was watching the heavy but quick drops with amazement and then realized Dongho was still holding his wrist. And he didn’t feel the urge to pull back. It felt right. It felt warm. Then Dongho’s warm hold disappeared from his pulse point and the shorter stepped forward but it was Minhyun’s turn to grab his husband’s wrist forceful “What are you doing? Dongho!” he asked trying to prevent the shorter from getting out of the shelter 

“I just want to feel it. It looks beautiful.”

“No! Don’t”

“It will not kill us Minhyun! And we don’t know when it will stop”

“But it will make us fall ill. I can call my driver.” Minhyun said reaching into his pocket to take his phone out.

“Don’t! If we fall ill, we will take care of each other. That is simple. The marriage is supposed to be like that right?” Dongho stretched his hand to prevent Minhyun’s hand to reach his phone.

**_As if it was a real one_**. Minhyun thought. He was really annoyed at how Dongho would say what he wanted to say, how Dongho would hold his hands like they were genuine. And he didn’t understand if it was bluntness or stupidity. But in both situation, Minhyun couldn’t stop his heartbeat frantically with a bitter joy.

Dongho stepped back towards the rain without leaving his gaze on Minhyun and finally rescued his body from the protection of the high, yellow shelter. He snapped his eyes shut with the shock of every sharp and cool raindrop hitting on his skin and shirt. There was a joyous smile on his face and it seemed really alluring to Minhyun. **_He is beautiful when he smiled; he is beautiful when he cried; he is beautiful when he was angry; he is beautiful when he is calm; he is beautiful when he is brave; he is beautiful when he is a coward; he is beautiful when he is eating; he is beautiful all the time. _**Minhyun found his foot stepping forward unconsciously to reach out Dongho and got out of the border of the plastic ceiling and let the rain bathe all of his soul besides his body.

***

Daniel bent over the lock and checked it again to be sure it was locked properly. He let out a sigh full of exhaustion caused by the unusual crowdedness of Saturday. The smell of suddenly- poured-rain in the early evening and humidity had been still lingering in the air and it had caused all enjoying-the-sun-people to run towards the places where had a ceiling over.

“It was the busiest day in the last 2 months.” Straightening his posture, Daniel said to Seongwoo who had been looking like he had been hit by a truck “Hmm. ” The tall man hummed “And it was the most terrible downpour in my 24 years.” Rubbing and squeezing his left shoulder with a silent groan. Daniel chuckled at his comment. Despite the late hour and sultry humidity in the air, the cars were whizzing on the main road and people were walking on the pavement with their husbands, wives, and children or on their own. The vitality of the city was still standing not showing any weakness to wane.

“Hmm. Goodnight then. Rest well” Seongwoo said pressing his lips into a thin line with the thought of he would not be able to see Daniel tomorrow and turned back to the main road to hail a cab “Seongwoo.” Daniel called out his name and made him stop to step further and turned his face to Daniel. “I don’t feel like going home. If you….” Seongwoo waited for Daniel to finish the sentence trying hard to focus on the face in front of him.

“…are not that exhausted, I know a place where we can eat and drink.” Seongwoo’s body was screaming with the wish to lie down on his king-sized and comfortable bed but. Who was he to refuse the offer made by his not-so-secret crush?

“No, I am not.”

Daniel performed his signature smile that had managed to melt Seongwoo every time. “Ok. Then. Let's go”

The said place wasn’t far away from the café and basically simply-furnished but extremely magnificent-smell, spreading from the small room and invading the air. _Grilled meat..._ Seongwoo thought with a growling stomach.

“Ahjumma! I came!” Daniel called out towards space after placing himself one of the low hockers circling a square low table. “Oooh! Daniel! Finally, you remembered this old lady was still living!” An old woman said going out from the doorless darkness. Her round and plump face making her small eyes disappear between her cheeks and thin eyebrows. Her short-cut, barely covering her ears, hair was making her round face look rounder. She smiled at Daniel wiping her hand on the white towel hanging down from her round belly and approached the table more.

“Dongho? Jonghyun? Where are these rascals?”

“They are not here today. I came with someone else.”

“Anyway, Dongho doesn’t know how to drink.” She said frowning and creating a magnificent smile on Daniel’s face. Her speaking was thick with Busan accent causing her voice to have a sharper but warmer tone.

“I hope he can drink more than Dongho” she kept, gesturing Seongwoo with her head.

“I hope so.” Daniel grinned at the tall man sitting across him and looked up the old woman again. “He is really handsome.” The woman whispered leaning down to Daniel but loud enough to be heard by Seongwoo. Blushing was strange for him and what the fuck? He could feel the redness spreading over his face, just by an old woman’s rude compliment. He looked at Daniel reflectively to see how he would react, and Seongwoo could swear he caught off the sight of vibrant redness covering Daniel’s cheeks. Something made his stomach cramp pleasantly sending electrifying sense all over his body. Since he had met this bunny-tooth man, everything he felt was like all new to his body and mind. His wishing to be out heart, the liveness in his stomach, blood rushing on his cheeks… And now he was blushing like a schoolgirl who had been praised in front of her impossible-crush.

“Yes, he is.” Daniel said with a sincere tone making Seongwoo’s blood rush in his cheeks more hastily.

“The usual one?” the old woman asked smiling. “Yes, please.” She made his way towards the doorless room again leaving still blushing Seongwoo and grinning Daniel behind and returned with 4 bottles of soju and grilled meat with rice and kimchi in 10 minutes. Daniel opened the first bottle and filled Seongwoo’s small glass after thanking the old woman who kept smiling at them. Seongwoo grabbed the bottle Daniel left on the small table and filled Daniel’s glass. Their gazes caught each other when Seongwoo put the bottle on the table creating a thudding noise. Something more was happening, something strange but good strange and Seongwoo couldn’t name it.

After an hour, the second bottle had already been emptied and the third one was in its halfway. Seongwoo could feel his mind was getting dizzier with every shot he had gulped down. Daniel wasn’t better than him. The broader man’s cheeks were displaying a stable redness now making him look cuter and harder to resist. _How can a mere human being be cute, hot, sexy, manly and irresistible at the same time? Is it fair?_ He let out a breathy smile huffing his nostrils and left his gaze from Daniel’s smirking face. Their gazes thrown at each other had already been staying on each other longer than usual. The intensity was still lingering in the air. Seongwoo’s stares were sliding from Daniel’s eyes to his lips and then his neck, throat and Adam’s apple while gulping down the liquid and that sight was making Seongwoo lick his own lips unintentionally.

“Seongwoo!” Daniel called out, making the tall man throw his thoughts aside and raise his head from his lap to look at the gorgeous man sitting in front of him.

“Hmmm.”

“I was just wondering…. What did you talk about with that girl?” Daniel asked with his sloppy voice that got started to be affected by the drink he had consumed in an hour.

“That girl?” Seongwoo questioned frowning and trying to comprehend to whom “_that girl”_ referred despite the dizziness blurring his all brain functions.

“She seemed really happy while you were whispering something into her ear. And I can't say you weren’t enjoying her company, either.” Seongwoo froze when he felt the hint of hurt in Daniel’s voice and the adrenaline rushing through his blood made his dizziness retract a little bit.

“She…” Seongwoo started but cut off with Daniel’s harsh and sharp tone.

“Did you sleep with her?”_ How can he sound so sharp while I am having difficulty even in breathing now?_ The broader male was looking into Seongwoo’s eyes directly without blinking and waiting for an answer. The intense stare made Seongwoo silent for a few minutes and shutter like a guilty girlfriend questioned by her boyfriend

“N-No!” he was cursing at himself inwardly. “That is not like that.” He managed to utter without shuttering.

“Do you mind explaining it, then?” Daniel asked in not-so-harsh-tone after leaving the empty glass near the green bottles. His eyes were still sparkling despite the dull lights dangling from the ceiling. Seongwoo gulped… How could he say Daniel that girl had wanted his phone number and he said “I am his boyfriend.” in the heat of the jealousy moment? It would be really humiliating. He let his eyes drop from Daniel’s face and his brain struggled to find something to tell… something logical. But the man in front of him interpreted his short-term silence into something Seongwoo didn’t like even a little bit.

“So, you slept with her.” Daniel voiced his thoughts screaming a silent disappointment.

“No! No! I didn’t.” He didn’t want Daniel to think he was someone who was sleeping with random people. **_At least since he had met him._** “Why are you jumping at conclusions about me?” Seongwoo retorted back with a furiousness that he couldn’t stop leaking out.

“Maybe because of the way you caressed a woman’s hips at the wedding night!!” 

**_Shit!! Hae-Won_**! Seongwoo thought. How could he forget the night he had seen Daniel for the second time? At the wedding of Minhyun and Dongho….

“Am I stupid to you?” Daniel asked softly but harshly putting the glass down on the table again sloshing down all liquid inside it. Seongwoo’s tongue got frozen not being able to produce even a single sound against Daniel’s soft voice but harsh meanings of the words spilled out.

“D-Daniel.” He managed to utter but was cut off again.

“YOU…are Hwang Minhyun’s friend. The Fucking Hwangs.. You must be a wealthy dude. One day you are coming in your too expensive suit to gulp down your espresso and then……. the other day you are becoming my co-worker.” Seongwoo’s dizziness completely disappeared placing itself with confusion, discomfort, and blankness.

“Are you playing with me? If so…… I should tell you I am not an easy man!”

“Daniel!!! I don’t think it is going somewhere …..nice and you are drunk. So....be careful while returning home.” Seongwoo put his arms on his knees to stand up, struggling with his shaking limbs. So many thoughts and feelings were devouring his mind and heart. _ARE YOU PLAYING WITH ME? _The question was lingering in his ears and the face Daniel made was haunting him with every step he launched forward. His eyes were looking for a vehicle that would take him away from here.

Yes, he couldn’t deny he had played with so many. But No! he wasn’t playing with Daniel. His body, his mind, his heart were screaming to him that fact since the very first time his eyes landed on him. Since the fucking engagement day…He raised his hand to haul an uber but

“Ong Seongwoo!” heard Daniel’s voice shouting out his name. He gulped down and tried to place a smile on his face before turning towards the man approaching him with hurried steps.

“At least answer my question.” Daniel said hurriedly, invading Seongwoo’s personal space as he had belonged there. The tall man could smell the scent of soju brushing his face with Daniel’s every breath. He was getting confused by the sharp turning of the events tonight. He had just wanted to enjoy Daniel’s company to prolong the time he had spent with him. And now the dumbfounded feeling caused by the extreme proximity Daniel initiated a few seconds ago…His legs didn’t listen to his command to step back. In fact, he wasn’t sure he wanted to step away from that man. Why would he instead of enjoying the breath swiping his skin, the eyes staring at him like they were looking for his soul, the lips he wanted to taste for a long time.

“Seongwoo” Daniel called out again to make him remember he was expecting a genuine answer. Seongwoo looked down licking his lips and when he raised his head, he couldn’t stop the words spilling out of his mouth.

“I want you to hear me out, Daniel! Listen to me carefully. NO! I. AM. NOT. PLAYING. WITH. YOU. She asked me about your …...phone…. number and I told her to **fuck off**. I didn’t sleep with her or anyone else since …...since I have seen you at that fucking café. Yes, I am a wealthy dude and I am working in a café just to see the man I like more. Now is there any problem? Any more questions? … Any more shit comments?”

Daniel displayed a small and gummy smile failing to hide his front teeth. “No! No more questions…. No more shit comments… And I am really glad to hear that.” In the other moment, Daniel was leaning towards Seongwoo to initiate a kiss.


	17. Fateful Day

He groaned and strained his limbs to prepare them to move again. His plan to drink with the excuse of Minhyun’s birthday had been buried deep down by his in-law-brother in the morning. He had been trying to contact his friends just to hang out. -His friends who had wanted to spend their late summer day with their girlfriends or boyfriends alone- Dongho and Minhyun, too, probably had been enjoying themselves in the middle of their date while he had been convicted to watch the paintings on the wall for hours and try to ascribe meaning to them aimlessly. His head was about to explode because of the lack of his-so- wanted-but- never-came sleep despite the cotton pillows, silky sheets on the extremely comfortable bed.

The clock was showing it was mid-afternoon and the sun was preparing itself to disappear in the horizon line. _What an exciting day_. He thought before sliding out of the bed and opening the door of his bedroom to free himself from his so-called-cage.

The moment he stepped into the dining room, Minki felt the tension filling the room though the soft Bach tingling in the air. His mother was sitting in front of the table with her all glorious posture and having dinner alone at the long table. Just a moment, his mind wanted to go back to his bedroom and the sleep claim him, but the hungry growl in his stomach made him go forward.

Paying attention not to make any unnecessary sound, Minki placed himself on the chair across his mother’s after murmuring a silent “Evening.” But he knew his prayers hadn’t been heard when she asked

“Don’t you know the time for dinner, Minki?”

He pressed his lips tight before answering the question making his already-annoying headache more annoying.

“I … don’t see anybody obeying the time-for-dinner rule…. Except me” the last two words had slipped silently from his mouth and he couldn’t stop himself from questioning “Where is dad and the others?” gesturing the empty chairs.

“He has an impor….”

“Aaahhhh” cutting off the sentence with a soft clap “True!!!….Sorry! My fault!! I forgot the rules in this house are just for me. Just me. Being sent abroad for years, being treated like a plague. Everything in this damn house is just for me.”

“You really like being dramatic” she huffed without changing her posture.

Minki let out a heaving breath and without raising his head from the table, asked “Be honest with me, mum! How many of your _noble_ friends do know you have a son except Minhyun?” before returning to savor his soup as he knew he wouldn’t hear an answer to his question but the crashing metal sound on the plate echoed in the room while he was keeping to spoon his soup and Minki could feel his mother’s straightening her body on the chair.

“And do you need me to remind you of the exact reason, Minki?” she asked calmly. Minki clenched his teeth with sharp anger, pain, and regret. He straightened his back to look at his mother in the eyes.

Not the words but the calmness stuck on her face angered him most. The calmness when he had been arrested with a large amount of illegal drugs in his pocket when he had been accused of being drug dealer at the age of seventeen by the man he had been in love with. When he had cried to death and begged for not being sent abroad when he had hugged her for the last time in the airport seven years ago. The same calmness making his skin cringe and his blood boil in his veins, have the curses come to the edge of his mouth. He would be less hurt if she slapped him, shouted at him but no!! She should have sat down with her calmness that Minki had hated too much.

“The past is the past. No need to remind me every time.” He snapped back standing up and throwing his spoon onto the plate with the hope of destroying his mother’s demeanor. **_But, no avail_**. She slowly took the knife again and started to cut the pieces into smaller pieces like Minki hadn’t said anything. After taking a small piece into her mouth, she cleared her mouth with the napkin and directly stared at her son.

“Then would you mind telling me why you went to him again? Minki!! In 2 weeks after you stepped on Korea.” Minki felt something dreadful and gasping, waited for a long minute to comprehend the sentence his mother had just uttered.

“Wh…. what?”

“You went to him again. You went to that scumbag again” This wasn’t a sentence with a question mark at the end but a clarification. Minki could feel the struggle of his fear trying to surface and throttle him. He couldn’t produce even a sound until he heard another devastating sentence that made his world crash down in front of his foot.

“You are going back, Minki!” he heard a silent hiss echoing in the huge hall and realized it escaped from his own mouth.

“No, mum!!! PLEASE…..please no.” his voice stuttering, he realized his whole body had already started to tremble.

“I don’t want to deal with _that scumbag_ again. I will not!!” the sentence was filled with disgust.

“Mum, please.”

“I DON’T WANT TO LOSE YOU AGAIN!!!!!” She shouted back out of her lungs against Minki’s silent whispers. Her calmness had already turned into desperation and anger confusing her trembling son. This was the first time he had been shouted at by his mother in seven years. There was devastation and anger on her face but not a disappointment.

“Once just once try to understand me, Minki! I am your mother not your enemy and you are my son………….. My beloved son” she had already been standing in front of Minki cupping his face and caressing his cheek softly with her thumb.

“MOM PLEASE. I am sorry. I j-just wondered. I will not…..I swear I will not…. I didn’t even talk with him! Don’t send me back, please” he grabbed his mother’s hand and squeezed them with the desperate hope of changing her mind

“You went to him again.” She repeated as if Minki wasn’t begging her, as if the sentence was causing excruciating pain. Her voice wasn’t accusing one but defeated. Realizing there was no way to convince his mother, Minki felt his eyes filling with unshed tears. His hands fell aside stopping to hold her hand.

“You are going back, Minki” without uttering any more words, she put her hand on Minki’s cheek and slightly caressed before going out of the hall leaving him with already pouring tears down his face. He knew that look on her face. He had seen that look seven years ago. He knew what she meant. He had heard that sentence seven years ago. He knew he would be back whatever he said, however much he begged and cried. The hot slide of the tears across his face and the silent sobs echoed in the empty hall.

He stood up from the chair that his body collapsed on until the tears dried and sobs got silent and made his way towards the huge window exhibiting the sun which was shining with its last glow and the sky was losing its blue to orange. The dark clouds had already started to pile in front of the sun.

_Probably a late summer storm_ he thought and opened the main door to breathe and walked away to escape from his own misery and his own past faults.

*

Jonghyun’s eyes stuck on the window displaying the sudden summer rain pouring relentlessly and he shoved his phone into his pocket unable to stop a sigh escaping from his lips. He had been trying to contact Dongho, his boyfriend, for hours and the damn thing had kept going straight to voicemail too many times. He had just wished to hear Dongho’s voice.

The shop had already begun to brim its fullest with the people escaping from the pouring and Jonghyun’s thoughts were shoved away by Woojin’s impatient but polite tone trying to explain how to use the console to a thick-headed customer. Unable to stop a sigh escaping from his lips he started to make his way towards his young co-worker passing through half soaked people. Before he managed to rescue Woojin from his misery, Jonghyun heard a soft voice calling his name and saw a familiar face staring at him with a mischievous smile.

“Ah! Kim Jonghyun, right?”

“Yes!” Jonghyun said barely succeeding to turn his body towards the familiar face. The owner of the voice was also struggling to make a way towards Jonghyun passing by the crowd. He was soaked head to toe, his slightly long hair glued on his forehead and his grey T-shirt clinging to his slender form with black pants full of dark wet stains.

“Oh! Please don’t dare to pretend as if you don’t know me!” Minki said after approaching enough to the brunette. Of course, Jonghyun knew the man standing in front of him although they had only met twice; first when Dongho got married and second when he learned that marriage was just a pretend.

“You know I am the one who knows your unconditional love for my bro-in-law.” He kept with a smirk and raised brows. “You are working here?” Above all, something about that man was really irritating Jonghyun. His boldness, his I-know-everything-attitude while he didn’t know a fucking thing.

“I think it is not a secret.” Jonghyun snapped back as much as silently he could manage, the anger flowing from his voice.

“Your love for Dongho or your working here?”

“Both” he deadpanned with an angry sigh while Minki was looking around until he stopped in front of Jonghyun again. He could feel the irritation leaking from the brunette’s stare but Minki wasn’t a person that would step back easily.

“How about dating me?”

“Wh-What?” Jonghyun’s eyes had widened as much as possible and it was clear to Minki, the brunette’s brain was trying to comprehend the situation. _How the conversation slid from his love for Dongho to dating this mad man. _

Minki’s inner self was really pleased to see the man’s confusion and struggle..

“I want you to date me.” he repeated although he knew Jonghyun had heard him really well. Without allowing him to utter a word, Minki kept

“I liked your appearance and you know you have to give up. Dongho is already married to Minhyun. Just try to go on with your life and date me”

Jonghyun was completely speechless with the bravery and openness of this man. This was frustrating. Really frustrating.

“You are really being ridiculous right now.” He said and stepped forward to pass by that irritating man but ridiculously- long-legged man had already been in front of him.

“I prefer saying realistic” Jonghyun couldn’t stop a huffing laugh.

“Realistic as in you want to date a man that you have seen only twice” he deadpanned directly staring at Minki.

“Realistic as in you have to go on with your life and start to date. I am willing to date you.”_ No way! _He wouldn’t win against this nonsense and he couldn’t say he had already dating Dongho and the mentioned marriage was a huge lie.

“You see there are lots of customers here that really need my help.” Jonghyun stepped forward again just to be caught by his elbow. He gritted his teeth not to punch Minki on the face. Presumably hard. The only reason he hadn’t already was his willingness to ruin the pretty face facing him.

“I need your help too.” The taller exclaimed and pointed to the biggest box in the whole shop. “I will buy this! Did you eat? What time do you finish here?”

Jonghyun shook his head and turned his back to Minki as if he didn’t hear anything. The younger grabbed his arm again.

“Alright! Alright! I was just joking. Can’t you at least keep me company while I eat something? I am hungry, I fought with my mom and I hate eating alone. My friends decided to spend their time with their beloved alone and Minhyun and Dongho, too, went on a date.”

Jonghyun’s feet stopped to move and his brain focused on just one sentence. **_Minhyun and Dongho, too, went on a date. Minhyun and Dongho…._**

While he had been trying to contact him, Dongho was with his fake-husband……With his fake husband who had already fallen in love with him.

His blood started to boil in his veins and his hands turned into the clenched fists at his sides. _Did he have to go? Why didn’t he tell me? He could at least send a message, right?_

“Please” Minki said unaware of the thoughts conquering Jonghyun’s brain.

“If you won’t buy anything, sir, please don’t disturb me”

“I said I would buy this thing, didn’t I?” Minki argued back before Jonghyun stepped forward...

“Woojin-ah! Help this sir with that box, please” and he left Minki behind with Woojin just to pull out his phone again.

*

The darkness had already dominated the sky when they finally got into the warmness of the car. The rain hadn’t still stopped falling furiously, beating the streets for hours. The shivering and irritation of wet clothes clinging onto his skin conquered Minhyun’s body meanwhile the content feeling he had inside, making his trembling lips to display an unconscious smile.

His eyes slid on Dongho who had been struggling with his seat belt because of the shivering hands and he murmured.

“You know if I fall sick you have to carry me to the hospital onto your back because I won’t let you drive my car”

“I will….I will…. pinky promise.” Dongho whined with the genuine smile on his trembling lips after managing the seatbelt. Minhyun felt his heartbeat rise drastically again and turned his blushing face towards the road not to lose his focus on driving.

“As I got the promise, now let’s go home to warm our frozen butts.”

“Hmmm.” The shorter murmured after releasing loud laughter. Minhyun couldn’t stop the smile alongside his husband’s joyous laugh. He sighed and started the car. Just yesterday he was drinking out of his mind with the hope of forgetting the feeling that had stabbed him relentlessly. But now, he was enjoying the same feeling making his insides flutter, feel more alive than ever and laugh with the man who had caused all these feelings. _What a contradiction. _Even if it was for just one day, even if he wasn’t sure whether he had done good or bad, even if he knew he would regret that soon, he wanted this. With Dongho. Like a real married couple. Like it was a real date. Even if he just didn’t know if he could restrain himself from wanting more. He was happy and content right now It was enough. For now.

……………………

The moment Minhyun pulled the key from its switch after parking the car in the garage, a cheerful ringtone echoed in the car surprising both him and Dongho. The latter went through his pockets hurriedly not being able to find the still ringing phone

“I think it is there.” Minhyun said gesturing the glove box. “Ahh… True.” Dongho pulled his phone out and said. “You go!! I will come in a few minutes”

“Alright!” the taller said but noticed the tension placed on Dongho’s face as soon as he laid his eyes on the screen.

Both went out of the car and Minhyun headed towards the exit of the huge garage. Dongho’s phone had already stopped ringing

He looked at the screen again and gasped the number of missing calls. How did he forget his phone in the car? Jonghyun was probably worried and maybe angry at him. _Sooner rather than later. _Despite the cold enveloping his all body and making him shiver, he managed to slide the callback icon. After a few seconds, he heard Jonghyun’s calm and deep voice. _At least he is not angry._

“Hello!”

“Hello Jonghyun-ah”

“Dongho…. I….I called you so many times.” _But worried,_ Dongho noted.

“I am sorry. I….” _I have spent my whole day with my fake husband and really enjoyed it. Forgot my phone in the car. Should I tell the truth? What is the truth? Will this hurt Jonghyun? _

“I…...I…. had a busy day.”

“Hmmm….I got it” Jonghyun said and Dongho heard a sigh. But the sigh wasn’t the one that worried him but the coldness and calmness in Jonghyun’s voice. They were friends for almost two decades now and Dongho knew Jonghyun had the tendency to withdraw himself into calmness when he was sad, worried or angry.

“I had just wanted to hear your voice but I guess you were too busy to pick up the phone.” Now, Dongho could clearly hear Jonghyun’s disappointment in his calm voice and he felt the guilt squeezing his heart.

“Jonghyun-ah…..I….” He started but Jonghyun’s sharp and now-angry voice didn’t let him.

“Good night, Dongho!”

“I will make it up to you, I promise.” He said hurriedly before Jonghyun hung upon him.

“Hmmm”

“Goodnight, Jonghyun.” And the line was cut off. There was something wrong. _Maybe he had a bad day. _He breathed out and made his way towards the warmness of the manor.

…………………

As soon as he entered the bedroom, he headed towards the bathroom leaving the thoughts gnawing at his mind just to think over and over another time. _Who had called Dongho at this hour? Why did Dongho get tensed up? Would they be able to have a date like that? It would be over in two months, right? Would they meet after they ended this fake marriage?_ And the other bunches of questions.

He stripped from his almost-dry clothes immediately and shoved himself under the hot splash of water. The frozen and tense muscles gave themselves away with the rising temperature in the bathroom and his mind replayed the whole day in front of his closed eyes. _The breakfast when he had been clarified as a snuggling husband by Minki, Seojun and his-not-making-sense behaviors, Dongho’s coming to his office, his stuttering birthday date explanation, and his sight while driving, their small talk in the sunlight, his face and scream when the seagull had captured the bread from his hand, ladies’ talking about their being happily married handsome couple in the restaurant and the rain_

A small but genuine smile spread on his face with the memories he would probably never forget. He didn’t know when the last time he felt so much peace and happiness was_. _ Just a fake birthday date with his fake husband. He was all over the moon. _I am really screwed._

Of course, he wailfully knew he was deceiving himself. Maybe tomorrow he would feel devastated again, maybe they would divorce in two months, maybe they wouldn’t meet after the divorce or worse they would meet and he would have to witness Dongho marry someone else and he would have to pretend as if he was happy for him as a friend like Dongho claimed he was.

Shaking his head to save his mind from the thoughts, he focused on the peace of the moment. The frozen muscles had already started to feel normal and the skin the hot water directly poured on had started to redden. He sighed and went out of the cabin to wrap a towel around his low belly, taking another small one to dry his hair. He opened the door but the sight he met when the bathroom door clicked closed behind him was the one making him freeze again.

That wasn’t the first time he saw Dongho topless but the man was standing with his almost-dried and slightly-curly hair, tight trousers showing off his thick thighs, and with his two tattoos sprinkled across his upper large chest. Minhyun felt his heart rate rise drastically again and blood rushing to his cheeks and ears. He was sure if he kept staring at the glorious man in front of him, he would feel the hardness below that he wouldn’t be able to hide. With the urge to clear his throat, he said not looking at Dongho but the wall behind him.

“Hurry and take a shower. You will catch a cold.”

……………….

The sound of the splashing noise of the water was conquering the silence of the room. Minhyun was probably enjoying a hot-water shower that Dongho’s body was craving for. Shivering made his frame shake with the urgency of getting rid of the wet and cold clothes clinging to his body and decreasing his body temperature. Dongho stripped off the t-shirt leaving his body topless. He sighed and let the warmness of the room soothe coldness that had got in his blood.

The bathroom was finally opened and Minhyun with only a long towel around his low belly drying his hair with another small towel came out.

_Just a moment._ Just a moment, Dongho froze and his mind rejected to cooperate. His eyes skimmed over the slender, tall but wide frame. He tried to suppress his need to gulp and his heart started to beat too fast to breathe easily. That was the first time he saw the taller so-naked and he wasn’t expecting _this_. He licked his lips unconsciously and noticed the blush covering Minhyun’s face making the taller more attractive. Averting his gaze from the half-naked Minhyun to end the awkwardness hanging between them, Dongho let out a small cough and heard the taller say

“Hurry and take a shower. You will catch a cold.”

He managed to hum passing by his husband towards the bathroom after collecting some loose t-shirt and pajamas from the wardrobe.

As soon as he closed the door behind him, he huffed a breath out which he didn’t realize holding. Looking at the mirror, he saw the same blush on his face as Minhyun’s, along with a heart beating crazily and a panting chest.

He splashed the cold water on his face again and again despite his wanting-hot-not-cold-water body.

“What the fuck is this?”


	18. Confrontation

He grabbed his black t-shirt, waving it to feel a little cool air through it and cursed at himself for wearing all black again. He swore when he got home, the first thing he would do was to throw away his all t-shirts that’s, his all-black t-shirts not to repeat the mistake of wearing them on too-much-sunny days.

It was almost afternoon and the sun was spreading its all glory creating suffocative hotness all over the land while the wind was easing it with the cool blow. People had poured into the streets again, enjoying the last summer days before welcoming the bitter coldness of the winter. Families, students, workers, couples… They were all outside chatting, laughing, gossiping, wandering around… The cafes and everywhere that had four walls and roof were full to their brims.

_Daniel… Guanlin… I hope they are doing fine. I should pay a visit to them soon. _ Dongho thought, smiling slightly and took a deep breath before slipping into the familiar store. The uneasiness settled on his chest after the call he had with Jonghyun had caused him to sleep restlessly. There was something wrong in Jonghyun’s voice yesterday night, he knew it but couldn’t decide it was anger, sadness, or disappointment and why. He didn’t want to anger, sadden, or disappoint him. Jonghyun was his friend…..boyfriend and Dongho would resolve whatever it was. Today.

The store wasn’t as crowded as he had guessed. Obviously, people had preferred to sit in cafes, drinking iced-God-knows-what instead of looking for books or games. His eyes scanned all over the place until they landed on the brunette man. Directly making his way towards Jonghyun,

“Hi Jonghyun!” he said smiling not to show the nervousness of which he didn’t know the reason. Jonghyun’s intense stare was on some papers, studying them with a frown on his face and his eyes lifted from the said-papers, meeting with Dongho’s. Just a moment he looked at Dongho in a daze but then a cold mask replaced on his face, returning to the papers again.

“Hi” the voice was_ literally_ icy-cold._ Exactly like I guessed._ Dongho thought and

“Can we talk just a little?” said directly looking at the man across him. He had already realized Jonghyun was trying to avoid direct eye contact and Dongho was really wondering the actual reason for this remote behavior.

“Sure” Jonghyun said frostily without lifting his head. After placing the paper in one of the drawers, he went out of the cashier part and directed towards a calmer spot, waiting for the other man to catch him.

Crossing his arms over his chest, Jonghyun stared at Dongho’s face in the very strangely-calm way.

“Yes, what is it about? What do you want to talk about?” Dongho couldn’t stop the tension caused by Jonghyun’s defensive posture, climbing onto his shoulders and hoped he wouldn’t stutter like a child caught by his mother trying to steal a few more snacks. _Whatever it is, we will talk_. He breathed out and asked more fiercely than he had actually intended.

“What is the problem? Jonghyun-ah?”

“You think?” The shorter man countered back raising his chin upper. _Then the problem is much bigger than I had guessed._

“Look! If this is about yesterday...”

“No, it isn’t.” he cut Dongho off sharply. Just a moment Dongho was perplexed by the sharpness of Jonghyun’s voice and then he collected himself together, letting out a huffing breath.

“Then what is it? You are acting strange.” Jonghyun’s angry-calm face suddenly lost its sharpness and then his features saddened. Letting out a breath and staring into Dongho’s eyes, he loosed his crossed arms and let them hang at his sides. As if the anger replaced with sadness and pride with disappointment.

“Where were you yesterday, Dongho?” He wasn’t expecting this question, what he had expected was an angry remonstrance about his forgotten phone or about the missing calls. But the question was asked so delicately. It hanged in the air like a thin glass ready to be broken. Dongho gulped down, not knowing how to reply. He shouldn’t tell him about Minhyun, right? 

“I was busy. I have told you that…… yesterday night.”

“No, you were not.” Jonghyun’s eyes were full of certainty and something bitter. Dongho opened his mouth to speak but the other man didn’t let him.

“You lied to me, Dongho. You were with Minhyun… with your fake husband ….dating with him, right?” it wasn’t an accusation. It wasn’t said in accusing way. Dongho knew it but how Jonghyun knew about that and …

“Since yesterday I have been asking myself ‘Did he really have to go’…’Doesn’t he remember me while everything in my mind is him or about him?’”

“I don’t expect you to fall in love with me at this instant but I expect you to respect me, Dongho! As your boyfriend.”

“Jong-“

“Stop!” he raised his hand and kept

“Let me tell you why I am so upset right now. Just two weeks ago you said you were going to try. But it is only me…. Trying.”

“Jonghyun-ah, please! It is not the case, you know it!” Dongho whispered.

“I don’t want to talk with you right now or I am going to say something that will hurt you.” He said and turned his back to his boyfriend leaving him in the spot, questioning all the feelings.

It wasn’t guilt or regret that Dongho was feeling right now. It was confusion and…. sadness. The sadness for upsetting his friend. The confusion of the questions that he wouldn’t dare to ask himself.

Why did he go to Minhyun’s office? He could just call him and they could decide the time and place to go home together to escape Minki’s questions and the awkwardness.

Why did he feel anger when he saw Seojun in Minhyun’s office giving him presents and smiling smugly? He had felt an urge to punch his face to destroy the smugness of it.

Why didn’t he remember he had a boyfriend out there? He could send a message at least, right? Wasn’t he trying enough as Jonghyun had claimed just now?

Why couldn’t he tell Jonghyun about the date? For the fear of upsetting him? But now didn’t he make Jonghyun sadder, angrier?

The last one….

Why does he feel sad but not guilty?

*

Minhyun entered the hall loosening his tie. The soft but predominant voice of his mother was echoing in the entrance of the hall. _She is probably having a talk with her-president-of-what-foundation friends. _

“Good evening.” He greeted looking around. The table of the dinner he had missed had being cleared hurriedly while his father was drinking his coffee, reviewing the reports of today’s meeting that Minhyun had conducted today. How could Mr. Jung be so fast? The meeting had ended just 2 hours ago and his father had already gotten the reports in his hands? _Maybe I should have a talk with Mr. Jung_. He sighed and his eyes slid to his husband.

Dongho was sitting at the armchair in a brown study. _God-knows, what does he think? Again. _ To release the shorter from the frustrating thoughts that made him stare at a certain part of the carpet for a while, Minhyun settled himself on the armrest Dongho had conquered. Still not succeeding to attract his husband’s attention and not knowing when-where he got this urge, he leaned downwards to kiss Dongho’s soft-looking fluffy strands after throwing his arm on his husband’s shoulder. Just a little display of affection in front of everyone wouldn’t be bad, right?

Dongho suddenly tilted his head upwards and his widened eyes met with his. _At last_. The taller thought, not being able to block a small smile grazing his lips. Minhyun could swear he saw a nascent blush on Dongho’s face, coloring his cheeks and ears with soft pink while his eyes shining with bafflement. A few moments maybe minutes had passed before Dongho averted his gaze from his. Minhyun couldn’t name what it was but there was another thing in Dongho’s stare besides perplexity. _Something more intense._

“Would you mind if I retire to rest early? I feel exhausted.” Dongho asked and Minhyun knew the question wasn’t directed to him.

“No, of course, you can. Good night.” His dad said affectionately lifting his gaze from the report in his hand.

“Good night.” Dongho said, sliding out of Minhyun’s arm and stood up before kindly bowing his head before walking towards the stairs.

_He can’t be bothered because of the kiss, right? Maybe he is really exhausted_ Minhyun thought while looking behind his husband.

*

His skin felt ticklish and feverish. He let out a breath as he threw himself on the silky sheets. Even the dimmed light was hurting his eyes beside the thoughts prowling inside his head had been causing an explosive headache.

Just an affectionate act. Just an arm around his shoulders and a slight kiss that he had felt on his hair made his all body ticklish throwing all the thoughts out of his mind alongside a hard-beating heart and crumbing stomach. _Why? Why do I feel like that? As if I have never breathed before…. As if my heart never beat before. Shouldn’t I feel fucking guilty towards Jonghyun?_

Just a kiss over shaded all the thoughts about Jonghyun. -I should have told him the truth- replaced with -why does my heart being squeezed-.

The light of the moon was being displayed on the floor creating silver and beautiful line through the huge glass wall meanwhile the sound of a clock tic-tacking was disturbing the peaceful silence of the room. He let out a sigh and put his arm over his eyes with the hope of getting rid of the ridiculous questions he hadn’t wanted to answer in the first place.

_The sun was already lost from the sky the slight breeze was filling his nostrils with the sweet summer smell. The sea wasn’t far away. He could feel it and smell the salty moss spreading itself in the air. A smile forced his face. He felt the hand holding his squeezing lightly as if it was trying to remember itself. The peace of the moment doubled with the feeling of grabbing his. He couldn’t stop himself and looked at their interlocked hands. His marriage ring was shining in the orange light the sun had left behind. A single drop landed on his face making him look towards the slightly dark sky. The clouds were adumbrating a sudden downpour._

_“I love you” said Minhyun suddenly smiling._

_“I love you, too.” He said. _

His eyes opened slowly. Dream… ….……… Fucking dreams again……..The moon was still displaying its luminosity and it meant he had just managed to sleep for a few hours most. The tingling sensation on his body was slowly returning back and he was feeling the warmness of somebody behind him. Minhyun. His fake husband.

The man he had been dreaming about. 

The man he had been declaring his love for him. 

The man telling him about his love.

A shiver made its all way all over his body again and pulling the sheet under his chin, he turned his body slowly to the sleeping man, “Tell me Minhyun. What is this _damn_ feeling?” he whispered and drew himself closer to the man.

*

The intense sunlight leaking into the room by the huge glass wall was sending signals for his body to wake up. His conscious was shuttling between the sunlight disturbing his closed eyes and the warm breath tickling his neck beside the soft, cottonous hair sweeping his cheek. He tried to ignore the sunlight and focused on the warmness beside him. The feeling that filled his guts made him open his eyes slowly and tilted his head towards the source of the warmness, Dongho, his husband. A tiny lock of hair was swinging on his eyelashes and his lips were slightly apart, breathing soundly. His cheeks were rosy pink even his slightly sunbathed skin wasn’t able to hide the color. _How does he look like a small child fearing the sound of thunder_?

Extremely careful Minhyun turned over his right side to see Dongho’s sleeping face clearly. It was like an allure to him. Before he couldn’t stop himself, he raised his hand to slide the strands back covering the sleeping face. Just a moment Minhyun thought his hand burned as soon it touched the skin and Dongho suddenly let out a shivering breath making the taller man retract his hand hurriedly back. He waited for a moment without even breathing. It would be really embarrassing and awkward if he got caught caressing his husband’s face.

He placed his hand on Dongho’s face again and then ……forehead ….but it was hot… like really hot. Bouncing up from his lying position he nudged the sleeping man lightly.

“Dongho! Dongho!” the shorter male was just breathing loudly as if he was really struggling to fill his insides with the air.

Minhyun tried again and shook Dongho more forcefully. “Dongho!” All he got back from his husband was a quiet whine. He stood up immediately and hurried to the other side of the bed. Tearing off the sheet from his husband, he shook him again

“Dongho!”

“C-co-cold” the shorter man was shivering and had already crawled into a fetal position. _When did he start shivering like a leaf?_

“Dongho it is not cold. You are burning up.” Minhyun countered back. “Get up!! we are going to the hospital”

“Hoss-hospital. No! No I- I am fine. I just feel cold.” His lips were trembling by the force of trying to produce sounds.

“Dongho! You are burning up. God damn it!!”Minhyun caught his arm to make him stand up. _In the hell, he would let him lay on the bed while he was burning up._

“P-Please, please. Minhyun-ah. I-I don’t like it there. It is noth-nothing.” Dongho pleaded with his half-opened eyes, his breathing accelerated.

“Why do you have to be as obstinate as a mule? You can’t even produce a sound without stuttering.” the taller grabbed his hair furiously and made his way towards the door.

“Mom! Dad!” He shouted towards the stairs hoping one of them would hear his bellow. Returning to the bed with hurried steps, he put his hands over his husband’s face again.

When he felt the presence of his father at the door, he said without letting his father make a sentence

“He is burning up and he doesn’t want to go to the hospital. Can you call our family doctor immediately?”

“Of course!” Mr. Hwang said and pulled out his phone hurriedly walking towards the stairs again. He wasn’t aware of his mother standing behind him until she made her presence known

“Minhyun-ah! Take him to the bathroom and shove him under the slightly-warm water. Not cold. Slightly warm. Hurry up!” His mother said before making her way out of the room hastily. He grabbed Dongho’s arm to pull the man upwards.

“D-Dongho! Look at me. We have to take a shower.” Dongho nodded with a whimper and Minhyun wrapped his arm around his waist and placing himself under Dongho’s shoulder until they arrived at the bathroom.

“I feel cold, Minhyun-ah”

“It is because of the high fever. Just sit here for a moment.” Minhyun turned on the tap making sure the flowing water was neither cold nor hot. He directed to Dongho again and

“Let’s take off your clothes” he pulled the shirt over his husband’s head and leered down to the pajamas bottom. Just a moment he hesitated. _Not now Minhyun! Pull your shit together!_ He pulled the elastic band down, leaving his husband-his fake husband- stand just in his briefs.

“I need you to go in the bathtub….Slowly.” He urged the shivering man towards the bathtub filled with the water. The look on Dongho’s face was displaying his hesitation clearly to go in the water. 

“You should, Dongho, please!” The taller supported his husband’s weight to settle him into the warm water without failing or breaking bones. Meanwhile, Dongho had already started to shiver uncontrollably making his teeth clatter, and his broad body shook like a leaf.

“Please! Dongho, I want you to lie in the water.” Minhyun pleaded and Dongho started to slide his body through the water.

“Co-c- cold” Dongho whispered with his trembling lips, chattering teeth and sat in the water whimpering until his whole body sunk in it. Despite the trembling, Minhyun could see the redness on his cheeks as if he had run for a few hours and his body was all on fire except his hands, they were cold.

“Ssssshhh. It will be better soon” Minhyun tried to comfort the shorter and leaned down to kiss black-brown strands. Dongho was just breathing shakily.

Minhyun grabbed the showerhead and soaked Dongho’s head eliciting another shivering gasp from his husband. 

“Just a little bit more. Can you do it for me?”

The shorter nodded before straightening his body slightly, bending his knees towards himself, wrapping his arms around them and putting his head on his knees.

“Just one more time. It will help to bring down your fever” Minhyun again held the water down from Dongho’s head, watching it flow for a few moments. Dongho was shivering violently, gasping despite the warmness of the water.

“I will get you a towel and underclothes.” He said and went out of the bathroom hurriedly, coming back with a fluffy towel and two pieces of clothes in his hand.

When he finally got Dongho lie on the bed, he pulled the curtains to block the sunlight leaking in and checked the air-conditioner. Letting out a sigh, he placed himself on the sofa watching his husband, half sleeping.

*

“It is a severe infection. At this time of the year, it can happen. It may cause fever, arthralgia and overfatigue. Use the medicine I prescribed twice a day on time. And be careful about dehydration. Make him drink lots of water and eat. If he rests a few days, he will get well soon.” The doctor said collecting the examination equipment. His slightly whitened hair and small wrinkles around his eyes were making him look dignified.

“Thank you. Mr. Lee!” Minhyun said bowing. The old man smiled making his eyes create a half-moon shape and patted his back while making his way towards the stairs where his father waiting for him. The last thing he heard before closing the door was his father’s thanking to Mr. Lee.

He huffed out a breath and walked back to his sleeping husband. He lied beside Dongho in turtle speed. His hand started to caress the black strands, paying attention not to interrupt his husband’s needed sleep.

A few hours passed while he was watching his husband and checking his fever once half an hour. The sun had already lowered itself behind the horizon, disappearing completely and leaving a light breeze behind.

“Dongho! Drink this.” he cupped the nape of his half-sleeping husband and brought the glass to his lips. All-day Dongho had just shivered and complained how cold it was in just his briefs and under the diaphanous sheet. About three hours ago, his shivering body relaxed in sleep which showed the fever had already been brought down.

He put the glass on the nightstand next to the frame of Jinho’s joyous, smiling face before lying beside Dongho. Actually he was afraid of the fever that might return back but he let the sleep claim him slowly. Beside his husband.

*

The heavy feeling on his eyelids wasn’t allowing him to open his eyes. Something cold was pressing on his forehead and forearm, disturbing the temperature of his body. The feeling of chill had already left. His newly regained consciousness was also making some images swim before his closed eyes. The motifs on the circular, light-colored carpet in the hall, the charismatic voice of the newscaster, soft kiss on his head with the heavy feeling of the arm circling his shoulder, Minhyun’s dark orbs, the moonlight leaking in the bedroom, the dream, Minhyun’s presence behind him, and then cold. He could remember when Minhyun literally dragged him into the bathroom and then into the bathtub. He could remember every small moment the taller made him drink something or caressed his strands back, or place the wet towel on his joints.

The realization of the throbbing pain all over his body hit him like a trunk and his all muscles felt like caned. He opened his eyes slowly to the assaulting sun. _A whole day then._ The chirp of the birds was filling the room through the opened window. Not being able to stop the groan, he tore off the antifebrile band from his forehead and threw his head back on the pillow again with a sigh.

The soft rhythm of shallow breath was displaying the certainty of the presence of his husband beside him. Despite the ache in his all muscles, he couldn’t stop the urge to see the sleeping man and slightly angled his body to look at the sight before him. _Such a beautiful sight_ he thought and smiled. It was clear that Minhyun stayed awake all night from the slight darkness under his eyes and the frown on his face. He strongly wanted to make the frown disappear.

His heartbeat rate considerably increased as soon as his eyes settled on the man. The squeezing feeling returned back with its full force alongside the questions that conquered his mind. Just in two days, the world felt like it had turned upside down and he had been feeling some strange and strong emotions that he had never been exposed before. It was difficult to distinguish them and difficult to answer the questions.

Why did breathing turn into a struggle every damn moment when he had looked at Minhyun? Why had he desperately wanted to spend his time with him while he had a boyfriend? Why did the time have a tendency to flow fast with him? Why had his heart decided to burst into flames with every simple touch? Why had he been dreaming about him constantly? Why had he been wishing to touch him, hug him, kiss him and breathe the fresh smell in his hair? Even now…

He sighed, closing his eyes and then just a moment he looked at the sleeping face peacefully again. He didn’t know if it was a moment or minutes or hours but he just looked at his sleeping husband.

Then it was all clear to him. Like someone switched on the light in the darkness. Like someone pulled him out of the unknown maze. Like someone woke him up from the endless nightmare. Why couldn’t he see that until now? But the child who had never eaten chocolate wouldn’t know the taste of it. If you didn’t know what the water was, you wouldn’t understand it was water you had been drinking for a long time. He was the child who had never eaten chocolate. He wouldn’t know the taste of it or how it felt like. So it had been hard to name, understand, or distinguish it. But someone said. But someone showed him. He had been a man who had never fallen in love.

His all why- questions wandering in his mind had actually a simple answer. A simple answer that was making his heart burst and strange feelings in his guts: Love.

I love him.

I love my fake husband.

I love Minhyun.

**Author's Note:**

> Really sorry for deleted comments :(
> 
> English is not my native language. I sincerely apologize for any mistakes. In fact, I wrote it for fun but I really don't know when and why I decided to post it. I hope you will enjoy reading it as much as me writing it. It will be a long story. :) Please be patient with me. I will try to update weekly. Love you:)


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